Anyone out there deafened and in their 20's/30's/40's?

Question

I lost my hearing completely at age 26, 10 years ago. I had no help with rehab the doc gave me tranqs and the social worker told me to 'learn to lip read, cos your gonna need it'.
It took me some time to accept the situation but i have worked hard to try to become accepted in the Deaf community, they are very nice and friendly towards me but i am not yet fluent in BSL and its difficult. I feel stuck in the middle. Deaf people think im hearing and hearing people think im deaf. The only other deafened in my area are the oldies.
Its all getting me down.....and i feel a freak

Answer 1

you have all my simpany my wife is partly deaf she was waiting 4 years for a hearing aid i bought her 2 hearing aids cost 1600.00 pounds she can now hear the grass growing.

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

You aren't a freak. How dare these so called health care workers just tell you to get on with it. I have a small grasp of BSL as I work in a school that uses it, I find it really difficult, but I have the option of not having to learn it. It's much harder for anyone that has become disabled in any way to come to grips with that, let alone then having to learn a whole new language. If you're born with the disability it's hard enough, but at least you've always learnt the language often from a younger age.
On a more positive note, I do think that you will gradually develop these new skills and hopefully show those unhelpful people that you're not going to be kept down by them.

Answer 4

I'm not deaf but I'm hearing impaired. My hearing has been getting worse for the past 4 years (I'm 25). I can still hear quite a bit, but I have major problems with hearing spoken language well enough to understand. I've practised lip reading and it helps me a lot. I don't know sign language.

One of my biggest problems related to my hearing is that people don't believe me when I explain that I hear badly. It's like they think it's either all or nothing, that either one is completely deaf or one can hear fine. People know that I hear something, so they have a hard time believing that I don't hear well and keep accusing me of just not listening and say that I'm lying about my hearing. I think my age plays a part in this too. People tend to think that young people are healthy in all ways and that either people are born deaf or lose their hearing at a high age. So I don't face much consideration or understanding, which can be frustrating.

You're not a freak. Some people can just be really ignorant and narrow-minded.

Answer 5

I'm in my 50's and have lost some hearing and have gained a world of 'sound effects' from tinnitus.

I began learning the standard BSL some years ago, but as I can only use one hand, they wouldn't allow me to take their test / exam, which I can understand - to a point, as it's a matter of 'quality control.' However, this brings into play a great many questions about deaf people (who can be really 'bloody minded') and whether they will or will not actually communicate with someone like me should I go stone deaf? ~ etc etc.

I'm curious as to where you dig up the word 'freak' in relation to yourself!! It's such an emotive term and used in such a self deprecating way too.

You simply need to keep plugging away at the BSL which will fall into place in time. I actually see BSL as quite beautiful, a bit like 'ballet' with the hands. Try looking at it that way for a change.

Good luck with it.
Sash.

Answer 6

You're not a freak! You just haven't found the right group for you. Maybe the other people in your community that are deaf are just the oldies but they would be a good starting point for you until you find a younger group perhaps. Social Services should be able to help you find a group with people nearer your age or perhaps there is a group for mixed ages. It takes time to learn BSL and everyone who has been in your position will have felt like you do too. Are there any groups in the Yellow Pages Directory you could make contact with or have you spoken to the Practise Nurse at your surgery. There is help out there for you and we wish you luck in your future.

Answer 7

I am profound deaf too. I have also several deifficulties in my life. I became deaf at the age of 2 and half year old. But i have won the heart of normal people through my great achievements that is i had stood third in a normal university just at the age of 19. People also consider me as normal.

So not break ur heart. Try to do Something better and try to get fame. People will like u soon.

Answer 8

I started losing mine when I was in my late 30s and gradually lose more each year. I don't get any help because I do lip read pretty well.

And I do know what it is like to be in the middle - although I sign very little. People who are Deaf definitely don't think of me as deaf. And people who hear don't seem particularly conscious about helping me participate without constant reminders.

So I do find myself as I get older isolating myself more. I find I do best in small groups or 1:1 - so I concentrate my social life there.

Answer 9

You are very young for this. Do you have any idea what caused it?

If I had my life to live over, I'd become an audiologist, because the way kids abuse their ears, they'll all need hearing specialists.

While I'm not deaf and I'm older than my 40s, I am having difficulties with ranges -- at certain pitches, my ears "mumble," and sometimes I fake being able to hear well to avoid having someone repeat himself or herself for a third time.

Answer 10

You are no freak! I shut my voice off and people ask me "deaf or hearing?" It's easier to make the first introduction as deaf.. Keep up the sign- watch volgs (video blogs on deaf sites) they really help for receptive
Does your town/city have deaf clubs? My interpreter friend does these scrap booking clubs and started a Deaf one. She and I go to these picnics vocational rehab. has about once a month to improve our sign skills. Maybe something like that where you live?
I'm a teacher of the Deaf and Hard of Hearing in US and have many kids either HH or losing their hearing. I wish you lived near me, I'd like you to come talk to them..start a website reach out to others in your same boat. me, my dad and the thousands of kids out there We need ya!

Answer 11

Nobody can make you feel like a freak unless you allow it.

Don't allow yourself to become depressed by a new challenge in your life. Life itself IS DEPRESSING from time to time.
There is a place for you in life. You may always be "in the middle" of two worlds and you're going to have to find a way to like it and flourish in it. You have to deal with the deck you've been given and refuse to be shut out of the life you deserve. Stand up and go get it. Your hearing shouldn't be a deterrent to most anything you wish to do or accomplish.
I'd say before you go looking for outside communal acceptance, you need to do some work on your inner acceptance of yourself. That's always the best place to start.
Blessings to ya' friend.....................