When I read forums and messages I interpret them to be negative. When you read things, you usually can't tell the tone of the message. But for some reason, I always read it to be the negative. When I read video comments on YouTube or even answers to questions here on Y!Answers, unless they are worded precisely to sound positive, I take them to be negative.
This also goes for correction and criticism. For example, when I write a paper for a class, the professor grades it and hands it back. And when I read his/her comments, I always immediately take it to be an attack of some sort. They may disagree with my reasoning on some subject, and I feel anger towards them for critiquing my work. The thing is, though, I am rarely angry about things and I always try to keep an open mind. But my natural reaction to a criticism is always the negative.
I was just wondering if others are similar or maybe have some comments on the subject. I appreciate it!
-Rich
2007-10-06 06:54:58 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Fran that's funny, it is a perfect example of a answer that would make me angry.
2007-10-06 08:28:02 · update #1
At times it sure seem that way ! But I really believe that it as do to do on how we take the answer to our question.
There are times that we have a negative point of view on certain things and someone else might see the very same thing in a positive way. So the best solution for this is to try to not let it bother you, just because a Professor grades your paper in a certain way that doesn't mean that he is right! You could be right! but there is no point on arguing or feeling bad about it at the end you are the one that know how you feel about it right?
I will give an example , A few years ago when my son was in High school he got a lousy mark on one of his history test. So I went to speak to the teacher and I challenge him to prove my son wrong!
I told him that just because he believed that he was teaching my son what he toughed was right that didn't necessarily meant that he was right and my son was wrong ,because we all understand and see things from a different point of view.
After all we are entitled of our opinions or beliefs, either they are correct or incorrect. We will learn from our mistakes !
2007-10-06 07:19:45 · answer #1 · answered by bornfree 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I use to scoff whenever I heard the term 'constructive criticism' as I questioned how criticism could be constructive? However, I've learned that such is possible. It all depends on how it's done. There is a verse in the book of Proverbs (the Bible) which refers to harsh words from friends as being far better than empty flattery from enemies. This is very true. Everything that sounds nice may not always be in our best interest. We need to figure out the motives behind the comments -- whether they are genuine or not and if they are intended to be helpful. Therefore, some criticism can be beneficial, especially if it aids self-improvement and hinders failure. The key thing about criticism is placing more focus on the 'how' and 'why' part of it rather than strictly focusing on 'what' is said.
2007-10-06 07:59:07 · answer #2 · answered by drewster 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hello Rich, Don't worry, you are not alone in this - I am married to your emotional brother! Its the way we all look at things as being half empty or half full and, to a certain extent, is a product of our own lack of self confidence. Criticism can be positive in that, if worded correctly and taken in a positive way, will help us learn and move forward. You are obviously intelligent by the way you express yourself so apply a positive outlook towards what is said and see what difference it makes. Good luck in all that you do.
2007-10-06 07:21:28 · answer #3 · answered by alex s 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dear Rich,
I wish that everything in the world could be positive too, but it isn't and never will be.
This is the best advice you will get while there is still time.
I hope you will accept this because that would mean that you are mature. You have many pshchological issues that need to be dealt with immediately.Please go to a good therapist or psychiatrist now. They can help you in a positive and non-confronting way to deal with these issues. If you don't you are going to have trouble in every area of your life from now on.
2007-10-06 07:25:38 · answer #4 · answered by Fran 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
no one like to be criticize, and not all criticism are real.
how to deal with it is only dependent on how truthful you are to yourself.
only accept criticism that are true, for those that are not true, try using other tones and see how it goes
2007-10-06 07:03:03 · answer #5 · answered by revelc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think all critisim is negative. Some people may just misinterpret what you mean.
2007-10-06 07:13:41 · answer #6 · answered by noseygirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋