Been back at home for 6 weeks now, and we've been trying to work things out. We both had our faults, but my spouse seems to forget everything he "realized" in the summer, and feels now that he did nothing wrong. Then, we have not been intimate for the entire time either, and he was pressuring me, having tantrums for the first 3 weeks, and then I'd feel guilty. Then, after the 3am yelling matches stopped, it evened out to maybe once every 4 or so days. The Dr. told us not to have heated conversaitons, and to each have a personal space to go to when we feel frustrated or need to relax. Now that we did, my space seems to be fair game to knock on the door every 10 mins. If I don't cuddle when he wants he views it as rejection, if I want to take a walk then all of a sudden I'm ignoring him, if we're on the couch, he stares at me and when I ask him if there's something to say, he says no. Then, if he starts discussing why I don't want to cuddle, I see the fight coming, so I keep taking ....
2007-10-06 06:46:30 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the Dr's advice to avoid it, but he is beginning not to listen, I know from frustration that he isn't able to discuss what he wants right now. We also has problems sleeping at night. I work, and he doesn't, so he wakes me up early wanting to cuddle or hold my arm, and then I can't sleep anymore, and then if I sleep in certain positiions he views it as rejection even when I'm not aware. If I leave in the morning befor work and don't give him a kisson the cheek he feels rejected... I don't know what to do... he is a nice person, cooks, picks up, but I don't feel this is right. :(
2007-10-06 06:48:45 · update #1
Thanks for the first 4 comments so far :)
2007-10-06 07:32:32 · update #2
It sounds like he's kinda 'clingy'.
I hope this works out for you both.
2007-10-06 07:13:04 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, a break is exactly what you need, even if the doctor didn't recommand it.
You sound like two strangers thrown together in a tiny box and then you are fighting till one emerges the winner leaving the other dead on the floor.
Definitely take a break from each other; and think of the reasons why you would want to stay together, even if there were just one and also about the reasons why you think it's not working.
Then see if there are things you can work on.
You should try for a while and if nothing changes, then well, maybe you'll need to rethink your relationship.
2007-10-06 14:15:46 · answer #2 · answered by Kc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he needs to grow up. Tantrums and strong arming you into having sex is not healthy for either of you. If you lose the emotional intimacy in your relationship, you are all through. Anger and resentment sets in. Maybe it's time to take a hard look at where you are at with him, and where you see that going, or not going? Good luck sweetie.
2007-10-06 14:28:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should of told that DR. to take that advise and shove it where the sun don't shine. You are dealing with a little boy in a man's body and he'll never grow up to be a man.
2007-10-06 14:34:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're both too immature to be married.
2007-10-06 13:49:44 · answer #5 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋