I am engaged to a man who gets a little abusive when he is drinking, he slaps me pushes me and then always runs off in the truck. Last night he took all of our guns, talked a bunch of nonsense threatened to call the cops and report my car stolen I love him but i dont know what to do
2007-10-06 06:31:12 · 22 answers · asked by deeeee 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
love yourself more, and leave him before he kills you , or before children are involved!!!!!!
2007-10-06 07:47:04 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ஐDanielleஐ♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you don't love him, you love abuse. You love pain. And your self esteem is in the toilet. What you love is what you wish he WERE, and what you love is an image that isn't even there. Hon, seek some counseling. You marry this guy, and you ain't seen nuttin' yet.
Just read all the postings on here about how " I saw some of these red flags, but I was just blind. Now I have three kids, he's beating me, drunk, out screwing other women, and I have no education and no money and can't support myself and all these kids. What do I do?" Time to end this one sweets. Here's some rules from my mom... sounds like you need them
1. The most important decision you will ever make is who you marry. Choose with your head as well as your heart.
2. Have no children until your bond is strong, and have no more than you yourself can support. You may just have to
3. At any and all costs finish your education to qualify for those high paying jobs. It is likely that you will work sometime during your marriage, probably for decades…. Get paid for it. And remember, your kids and your education are forever…. Husbands, lovers and promises are not!!
4. Have a stash of cash no one knows about even if you are sure you will never need it. You absolutely will, and the more the better.
If this is a serious posting, hon, you are looking down the road at nothing but problems if you don't leave. let some other female have him.....
2007-10-06 06:46:19 · answer #2 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An what is it about this man that you love?
The bruises from being slapped and pushed?
The pain from being slapped and pushed?
The words he shouts at you?
The threats that he uses against you?
Do you want those things and worse for the rest of your life? It will only get worse as he sees that you will put up with it.
2007-10-06 06:35:38 · answer #3 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave him until he gets help and straightens himself out. You are in a dangerous situation, especially with guns in the house. I would also press charges against him to give him a wake up call.
There is NEVER a reason for physical abuse.
2007-10-06 06:36:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie I thought my husband was a jerk, but this guy is worse ... mine is just verbally and mentally abusive, this guy is physical.
I know they are not like this when we fall in love with them, but they progress to being like this because they don't love themselves, and therefore cannot accept anyones love and it follows that they cannot give anyone love.
This guy needs some serious therapy, which unfortunately he may not get while with you, and maybe not ever with anyone else either.
I think you know what you have to do. Good luck.
2007-10-06 06:39:14 · answer #5 · answered by Chikadee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
break up with him unless you want your life to be life like this all the time and you don't him to keep hitting you you sound like a really sweet girl get your car back and get away from him love hurts but you will regret if you don't get out of this relationship. I hope you have a supportive mom like i do
2007-10-06 06:38:25 · answer #6 · answered by dreamweaver 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
phh.. sorry, but its a dangerous situation. It will be easier to walk away NOW then later! If you committ to him you will feel obligated to stick around and help him. Have enough respect for yourself to walk away now before it will hurt worse later to walk away. keep in mind that you might end up having children with him if you stay with him which will then expose them to that same abuse and expose them to seeing how he treats you. It's disturbing to them because they are so full of love and innocent when they are little. You will have to live with regret and guilt if you get into something like that.
2007-10-06 06:36:40 · answer #7 · answered by In over my head 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Break off the engagement. He's got problems that I'm sure will get worse. RUN!
2007-10-06 06:34:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him that when he is drinking he hurts you and that you dont have to take it and you would like for him to stop drinking. And if he wont honey then walk away from the relationship
2007-10-06 06:34:47 · answer #9 · answered by weeping_spirit 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
leave! you wont be able to fix him and things will only get worse. I know you love him hitting is not love! but time and time again I get ems runs to women who get the s h i t beat out of them, and they always go back because they love him. just leave him!
2007-10-06 06:46:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave. This guy needs to give up the booze or the guns, preferably the booze.
2007-10-06 22:32:48 · answer #11 · answered by kttphoenix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋