If a person grew up in a home where one of their parents was a habitual cheater, is that person more likely to cheat when he/she is married/in a relationship? What if the child never knew that the parent was a cheater until he/she was grown or never found out at all? What if the child hated that the parent cheated and swore he/she would never do that to someone he/she loved?
If you think so, do you think it's something in the genes, or is it a learned behavior from childhood?
If you don't think so, please tell me why.
2007-10-06 04:40:56 · 13 answers · asked by ncgirl 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If U never "learn" what cheating is...U cannot cheat.
2007-10-06 04:43:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think cheating is some thing that is learned from others and the influences around us. I don't agree with it . I think if you dedicate your self to a person in marriage you put all your love into your relationship work at it, communicate problems out instead of finding another person when things get rough. Most children are hurt and have very angry issues about a parent cheating because it hurts everyone involved.Its OK to be angry about it. I think Its a choice to cheat or not people are temped all the time. If a person believes Its morally wrong and know how it effects all involved more than likely they will not cheat because they know the pain and hurt involved.
( I was married for 13 years and cheated on It was so painful. I am now remarried to a great guy I honesty know he would never put me through that he's a good guy.) I hoped this answered your questions. If you want to ask more questions contact me.
2007-10-06 05:20:03 · answer #2 · answered by Hugs from Sugar bug 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I sure hope not---I would hate to think that either of my children is destined to cheat just because their father did! I have certainly drilled it into their heads enough how wrong it is and how much it hurts, and I think they saw enough of the damage in their own lives.
As far as I know, my ex's dad never cheated on his mom (if so, it was either "before my time" or they hid it well & kept the marriage together). However, I did see some personality traits in his maternal family that probably lent themselves to the cheating. He had several relatives with at least borderline
bi-polar disorder (which I also believe he suffers from) though none of them would probably ever admit it. So I guess in that sense, if there were underlying genetic factors it could contribute.
I would think that a child of a cheating parent might be even more resolved to break that cycle, much like the child of an abusive or addicted parent.
As a Christian, I also believe that since cheating is a sin, the ability to overcome the temptation of cheating would come from the power of Christ in one's life. This is certainly a "last but not least" point, because I personally believe this is the most important distinction. I know Christians cheat too, but ideally if a person were committed to walking with Christ, he/she wouldn't fall into this sin. Those who do are living out of fellowship with Christ when they break this commandment.
2007-10-06 04:53:00 · answer #3 · answered by arklatexrat 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is a learned behavior. It's the feeling of entitlement that one uses to justify poor behavior. Studies have been done on this, have a look around the internet. Males will say it's because they have the need (biologically) to spread their seed to as many as possible, thus ensuring his gene pool. In the meantime women are most prone to cheat during ovulation because (biologically) they must ensure that the male with the strongest most viable sperm impregnates them. That's all well and good if we were animals in the wild. However, one things that seperates us from not only our ancestors but also primative animals is logic. We do not need to cheat for any scientific reasons. Some mating animals are monogomous - therefore the human should be duly monogomous if one so chooses. So, back to the original statement - cheating is brought about by a sense of entitlement, a disregard to ones committment due largely in part from selfishness/self satisfaction. So to those who will give thumbs down, think about it, research it. I know I did.
2007-10-06 05:04:31 · answer #4 · answered by Lori E 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about infidelity. It's true in homes where children are raised with great amounts of verbal and physical abuse.
What's serious about being a good parent is children are emulating us from the time they are very little. I knew a good man & woman who adopted a boy as an infant. He idolized his adopted father and picked up his mannerisms. When people met the son they said you can tell you his dad is.
Back to your original statement the parents are demonstrating that being faithful isn't worth the effort.
2007-10-06 04:54:09 · answer #5 · answered by Will 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure there has been a study on this before. It's probably genetic. Remember, as males, we have been programmed to ensure that our genes are passed on.
Similar to other species, the male will have intercourse with as many females as possible. Obviously most human males have somewhat evolved from this...but not all. I mean, I can admit that I have been tempted many times.
It's a good reason why males will continue to produce sperm well into his late years, while a female has a set number of eggs.
2007-10-06 04:44:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be both, we'll never know for sure. That would be an interesting study. Usually both genetics and environment play a factor in one's behavior.
2007-10-06 04:42:55 · answer #7 · answered by Psylence 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is a learned behavior because you have to determine/learn what cheating is.
What do you define as cheating? A lot of people would consider the spouse making out or having sex with someone else cheating. This may not be cheating at all. What difference does it make if you have sex with someone else. Sex is not love. Sex is hormones.
I would be more mad about the collegue he spends every minute with but has never physically touched than the secretary he screwed one time 6 months ago. Most people would see that the other way around.
Why is the behavior happening? Well, he had sex with the secretary bc of some fantasy or he was horny right then or she seduced him or whatever. He doesnt just suddenly have sex with someone else bc he no longer loves his family and wants out, and probably has nothing to do with his family.
He spends every min with his collogue bc he has developed a RELATIONSHIP with her. Maybe he is falling in love her. Maybe he is leaving you for her. Relationships happen over time and are much more impt than any one night stand or even an on going sexual thing.
So before being mad and hurt at 'cheaters', how is he 'cheating' and why?
An example
When I was 19 I had a one night stand with this guy. I was drunk, he knew I was drunk, he was much older than I was. His sig other was out of state with another man. It just happened. It meant nothing. I had no romantic feelings for the guy, nor did he for me.
But it came out, his sig other was mad, lots of drama happened. Again, it was a drunken one night stand that meant nothing to either of us. 5 years later his sig other everyonce in a while will still call me in a jealous rage that he cheated on her. He didnt cheat on her. He had sex bc he was horny with someone much younger who was drunk. Right or wrong as it was, had nothing to do with the feelings for his sig other.
2007-10-06 05:44:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
Cheating is someone's own behavior. It can be learned, and it can be controlled.
2007-10-06 04:45:54 · answer #9 · answered by PRSD 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not hereditary . A person has morals or they don't . It can go either way .
2007-10-06 04:44:21 · answer #10 · answered by missmayzie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋