Breastfeeding is bonding?

Question

I was just curious at what time, if there was one, did breastfeeding your child actually become a bonding situation.

Perhaps I'm just a bit jaded for the moment. It's only been 2 weeks but it feels more like a battlefield than a bonding situation. First there was the sore nipples and learning to latch correctly. Now that we've got that down, it seems either gas or colic has got my daughter all worked up. She bites down, pulls away and gets generally frusterated and hurts me. Any suggestions? And does everyone go through something similar and then once you have it all down it becomes that loving mother scene you see in the pictures, or do I need to expand my views of bonding?

Answer 1

It is a bonding situation, if you cant bring yourself to let it be one for you, it certainly is for her, no matter the situation.

Yes, every woman goes through this, especially with their first. Its hard to figure out how to breastfeed, and equally as hard to be a newborn and not know how to do anything, and not even be able to express anything without crying.

It does get better though. Just tough it out. I literally cried EVERY TIME we nursed from 2 weeks to three months. My nipples hurt SO BAD, just the thought of nursing made me want to cry. Then I got a clogged duct. Then my son was sensitive to EVERYTHING I ate, including veggies. I basically had to eat toast and noodles for a few weeks to get him settled.

If your nervous or upset, your milk will sour and wont let down, so its hard for baby to eat, this causes colic, and also an inability to nurse well. You have to be relaxed, as much as possible. And watch your diet. Even things like having one chocolate bar are enough to upset the balance for a day or two. But its only in the begining, only those first couple months.

Get some mylacon for the gas, it helps her greatly.

Once the pain is over, and the technique is gained, it really is the most amazing thing ever. To see your baby turn towards you. For them to realize one day that MOM is providing all thse wonderful boobie, that even when theyre scared or hurt boobies make it all better. To have that time when they realize they can see you and communicate to you with their eyes while they eat. Its honestly breath taking.

It is hard at first, but it DOES get better.

Get yourself some lanolin cream, and put it on after each feeding. It will help protect your nipples and soothe them after a rought nursing.

Answer 2

Check out this question, I asked it a couple of weeks ago or so.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AjCN5Yaf3ua0NfXJrcCqOODty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20070923110028AA92cqG

First of all, breastfeeding is not easy. Every mother goes through some problems at the beginning. Gas and colic would be a lot worse if you bottle fed. No matter what's bothering her, nursing comforts her, even if she has no way of tellling you. You'll start to understand how much she loves it, once she's older, and she'll be pulling on your shirt to get at her milky. When she'll be humming from satisfaction while she drinks.
Until then just be patient, and feel good that you're doing the best thing in the world for your baby, and she'll appreciate it one day.
Now about the problems, get in touch with a lactation consultant to help with the latch. Contact LLL, they're wonderful.
When the latch improves there should be little or no pain. Get a nipple ointment. Lansinoh is really good. It's in a purple tube. Applying heat also helps. Dip a towel in really warm water, and apply to your nipples. Then let them air dry and apply the ointment. A good lactation consultant will be able to help you with all these problems.
The first few weeks, and for some womenl even the first few months, are very diffult. You'll get through this believe me. It's worth the trouble, and you'll never regret it.
Spend as much time with the baby as possible. That will help keep your supply up and even increase it. Sleep with her if you can. That way you can nurse lying down, and get some more sleep, which will give you more strength, and patience.
Just don't let anyone discourage you. You can do this.
I wish you the best of luck, and congratulations on your baby!

Answer 3

Both of my children were tongue tied so I had major issues nursing in the beginning. With the second one I had cracked and bleeding problems, etc... Now he's almost 7 months old and has it down. It sometimes takes a while to get in the groove. It took me well over a month this time. I think you are going through issues that a lot of moms do and if you stick with it you and your baby will get the hang of it. Gas and Colic can be really frustrating but they pass when the babies digestive system starts to mature. Try Mylicon drops for the gas, they were a life savor for both of my kids. Nursing is a wonderful experience but it doesn't work out for every mother and baby. If you have to give it up, just know that the colostrum has the most important nutrients for your baby and they get that in the first few days of nursing. Good luck to you!

Answer 4

Breastfeeding doesn't "create" your bond it enhances it. Doe's everyone really think that mother's who bottle feed aren't bonded with there children? What a lack of logic.......

Anyway, the first 6 weeks is usually the hardest. It will also help if you are calm and relaxed. Good for you that your keeping this up. I would contact a lactation consultant to help you through this and get some support. Because it should be a loving experience not frustrating to you and baby.

Answer 5

Yeah you will get past all of all of that, it's the winding that you need to get used to, a baby fights at the breast when it has a wind. Please believe that this is not a breastfeeding problem but a winding problem and colic can also be extremely frustrating but bottle feeding can make it worse. Breastfeeding is an awesome thing once you get used to it. Here is a site with a very helpful article on breastfeeding, things that help and also about the bonding. Scroll down a bit to get to the article.

Answer 6

If she has gas-like issues, it may be something you ate. My daughter was gassy after I ate any tomato product- sauces, tomato in salads, etc. I omitted those things until she was 3 months of age- and she has been fine since. Other things that bothered her- caffeine. Get mylicon drops and keep them nearby- it helped a lot!

The first 2 weeks are hard- for our son it was the first month. You are always nursing, you are learning about each other, and you are tired. It does get better. I promise. Our baby is 13 months old and still nursing. Use lansinoh ointment between feeds- it will help with the sore nipples. You don't need to wash it off before you nurse again.

Sometimes, baby wants to suck, but not to get the milk out. She would be frustrated because with a fully tummy of milk and wanting to suck, she'd get more out- and not want that. Yet, she'd want to suck. This may be why she is biting down and pulling away. Our baby did this. I rocked her, danced with her, etc. You can try a pacifier but it can interfere with nursing. I opted not to.

It does get easier. It really does.

Good luck!

Answer 7

for me the bonding part kicked in pretty quickly, but I did have all the issues, sore nipples, biting, etc. I just hung in there, put the creams on that wouldn't hurt the baby and relaxed, in a few weeks it all came together and I loved the experience. Now I'm not saying it will happen for everyone, but try to relax and hang in there another couple of weeks, but don't beat yourself up if it never happens. Bonding happens in many ways.

Answer 8

hang in there! it will get better, it will end up being a great experience for you, and it's so healthy for your baby. it is a great bonding experience.

don't give up. i took tylenol about an hour before nursing and that seemed to take to edge off some of the pain.

i know it's hard at this point, because you are sleep deprived, emotional, and perhaps overwhelmed. take it one feeding at a time, and just know that it will not last forever.

best of luck!!

Answer 9

Everyone starts out this way, but eventually once you and the baby get the hang of this thing it will be an very loving wonderful time for you both. Your baby will know you as the loving provider, and feel safest with you, what is more special than that??

Hang in there hun, it takes awhile, but it is soooo very worth it once you both catch on.

Good Luck!!

Answer 10

It worked straight away for me, but for most mothers the first six weeks are very close to hell on earth...once baby has the hang of it though, and feeds easily and happily, it's intensely bonding, and sooo very special. It's lovely to see your child feeding on the breast and gazing at you at the same time, then pulling off the boob to smile at you drunkenly with milk running out of their mouth lol.

Hang in there, it'll work out in the end.

P.S colic is usually worse with formula