My wife of 15 years has had four very part time jobs. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. The problem is she is friendly to everyone around and she goes out of her way to say hello to good looking men. I have caught her in very close encounters with more men than I can list. I know some of them have been closer than I think most men can tolerate. She tells me she is just being friendly. I just think that she wants the attention and it makes me wonder how far it goes. She has said for the last year that she doesn't go out of her way to be friendly where in fact she has three very close men all over her. Why do I worry? Four short jobs and 7 guys have told her that they wanted to take her to bed. I guess that is the friendly part I worry about.
2007-10-04 19:06:13 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If she admits it or not, she likes the attention. I've been married for 15 years and my husband is a good man. He loves me and takes care of me and he lets me be myself. However, sometimes I will tell him when I have an encounter with another man that has flirted with me even in the most innocent way. I want to see if he will react. He never does. I don't go out looking for more attention, but I do let him know when I've caught someone's eye or vice versa. It is nice to be admired, for both sexes, by someone who doesn't know you. It lets you know that you are still attractive but she may be looking for something MORE from you by doing this. Don't get mad right away, try to look at your relationship and see what she may be missing from you.
I'm not sure what the part time jobs have to do with it, but you may need to dig deeper with in yourself to see why that bothers you. On the other hand, don't live in denial either. If men are telling her they want to go to bed with her, and these men aren't drunken idiots, then you need to open your eyes a little wider. You have to have self respect. Good Luck.
2007-10-04 19:41:29 · answer #1 · answered by TJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have good reason to worry, these men are only after her body, they could care less about her as a person. They don't mind trying to get some uncommitted free sex. She probably gets off on the attention from them. It feeds her ego. If she is good looking she doesn't have to go out of her way to attract men. They are always looking at bodies. You are a guy you should know all that. Just keep a close eye on her and until you have proof she is going all the way with them, not much else you can do.
2007-10-05 02:22:20 · answer #2 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be you are not spending enough QUALITY time with your wife. If not then she is trying to get that by having the men friend. Doesn't mean that she wants them, but I bet if you start doing a little more with your wife instead of just being there then the men friend will soon be a thing of the past. Try being a little more compasionate and try to sprice things up between you and her. Sure you might be there physically but are you there mentally as well?
Then again she could just like the attention from the guy friends and needs it to an extent to feel like she is worthy or something.
2007-10-05 02:16:53 · answer #3 · answered by Kris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably just jumping to conclusions. If she goes to talk to these men in front of you, then there is more than likely nothing to worry about. If she were to do it behind your back, then you would need to worry. Also, 7 guys have told her that they'd like to take her to bed. How did you know that? Did she tell you herself? Again, if she says it outright, then there's nothing to really worry about. The day she stops telling you is the day she doesn't want to get caught.
It's an ego boost! When I get male attention outside of my marriage, I tell my husband because I have nothing to hide. Part of me likes it when he gets a little bit jealous, or maybe it's just my way of telling him, "Hey, buddy. Don't start to take me for granted, okay?" But the day I stop talking about other men will be the day that I'm starting to find a way to cover up things, and that will more than likely lead to an affair. But saying it outright means nothing.
My husband also has had to get used to the fact that I'm overly friendly to people! He doesn't get it...but that's just me. I say hi to women, men, kids...anyone! I think when he sees me being friendly to a waitress just like I'm friendly to our waiter, he knows that I'm not intentionally flirting. He just worries that the guy might think I'm being flirty!
2007-10-05 02:13:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you trust our wife then you have nothing to worry about. If she has never given you reason not to trust her then maybe you should be glad that she comes home to you every night. If your relationship is good and is strong you needn't worry. The only time infidelity can enter a relationship (I believe) is when there are already problems.
2007-10-05 02:21:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are jumping to conclusions,there is being friendly and just going overboard.I'm sorry but something is definitely odd in this situation.Tell her that her "kindness" is making you uncomfortable,and is making you think that that you shouldn't.Ask her what is really going on.
2007-10-05 02:16:40 · answer #6 · answered by demonfirelife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are right. if you feel she should set some better boundaries to sute you better then she should respect those kinds of request. after all she did marry you. people now adays just marry and dont even value those vows andwhat they really mean.
2007-10-05 02:24:53 · answer #7 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be menopause coming on. She wants to feel wanted. If it really bothers you, talk with her about it. Tell her your concerns.
2007-10-05 02:11:26 · answer #8 · answered by Kathy R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋