Why do people think a guy with female friends is cheating??!?

Question

I see questions on here all the time about this. Women who think that their husband is cheating just because he talks to women.

I have never done a damn thing to cheat on my wife, but I talk all the time with female coworkers, about our lives, problems, etc. I go out to lunch with them. We (as a group) go out for beer and wings. I have even travelled for training alone a few times with one of them. My wife believes in me and I have never given her reason to believe otherwise. Although what I describe most people would scream "CHEATING!!" to, I have done and will do no such thing.

Why are people so quick to assume that?

EDIT to the "rings" comment - I have had a couple of women try to get too close or become inappropriate. They are no longer my friends if they cross that line.

To the person who did not understand...

My issue is not with my wife, who loves and has total faith in me. My issue is with people who assume any man who chats with women is cheating.

Answer 1

People like to assume the worst in people. It makes them feel better about themselves. They think that other people would cheat because in reality...if given the same situation...they would.

Answer 2

I think people scream this because lots of us are wounded and want to help. My husband cheated with a co worker but I have no control over that then or now...he can even choose to make the same mistake again--it will cost him---he will always work where there is a woman or ten...just have to trust and if you cant do that then have faith in God to take care of you It sounds as though you make wise choices to go out in groups and run the other way when you are advanced...good show!! I think a lot of men are boys at heart and not detrmined like you to preserve a marriage

Answer 3

Great question, though most men probably WOULD cheat under the situations you describe. Women know this, so they play the odds and call us all cheaters.

I too have never cheated on my wife. I won't either. Why would I risk my marriage over a one night stand that I have to pay for a hotel room, probably dinner for two, then come up with some elaborite story that my wife would believe when all I have to do is walk up to my wife and say "Break out the Karma Sutra, baby! You KNOW what time it is!"??

Answer 4

Until I read your added detail about you stopping the "friendship" when the women got too close, I also thought "cheating... lying". I commend you for staying true to your wife. Most women will assume as I originally did because most of the time, not always, but usually, it's true! Men can't have female friends without benefits. The fact of the matter is that men and women are chemically different and when there's sexual attraction, there will eventually be sex happening. It'll never mean the same to the men as it does to the women (usually), but the act will happen. Been on the receiving end of that one way too many times. The line is too fine and men (women too) can't help but cross it. (most of the time), so congrats if you haven't, and God bless your wife for trusting you. Don't do anything to change that because once gone, it will never return.

Answer 5

You are a rare exception and your wife is lucky! I gave my husband lots of freedom and he abused it. He just had to see how far he could go and what started out as friends became lovers again and again...such is the story over and over with so many of my Friends. And it works the other way too, women cheating on their faithful husbands.
If you do have a strong relationship, I'm happy to hear it. It gives me hope that there are more men like you. Hopefully you will have sons and raise them to be faithful too!
Thanks for giving us skeptics hope!!

Answer 6

That's because they are in a non-trusting relationship and are very insecure. I really don't like the fact that a lot of folks on yahoo answers feel that once your married you can't have friends anymore.

Two adults are capable of going out and having a good time without wanting to sleep with each other. By the way my wife has more male friends than girlfriends. Why, because she hates weak women.

Answer 7

You sound genuine in what you say and if your relationship with your partner is good and she is ok with it stuff what others think.

On the other hand WHY WE THINK THINGS - I was out of town last week visiting my best friend we have had a horrible year both loosing our parents to cancer within a month of each other and needed some time out. My partner said he just went out with his 2 mates for a few drinks (no problem there) and that he sang karaoke (unheard of) but later on the story comes out that it happened to include one of his single female business clients who was a having drinks for her birthday at the same place (no coincidence she invited my partner and his mates) just amazing that something always comes up like this if I am not around but never any other time, I would be ok if all amicable and he did not act so suspiciously, he deleted all but one of his messages from her and when I asked him he said i didn't want you to be upset... but truth is I am more upset because he tried to cover it up... rather that he was honest about it as perhaps you are with your girl. no wonder we don't like the whole female friends thing! now you know why we are funny about this!

Answer 8

That's about 1 in 10 will honor the bond and total loyal to their partner.

Most has a second thought or fantasy, about 9 / 10 . Almost 1/3 will cheat if opportunity presented. It's human nature, especially in the western liberated world.

Answer 9

Because most men do cheat and they say "It's a friend" !!
But there are honest , respectuful man that are in love with their wife and do respect that love... But put it the other way around wouldn't man be thinking the same if wife have lots of male friends, co worker and they are just friends..Ofcourse man will be the same.. I just belive if in a marriage there is respect , trust and love then wife or hubby shouldn't be worried about who he or she talks too.. It is just how Good marriages work out trusting, respecting & lots of LOVE!!!

Answer 10

Well, unfortunatly for me, my husband cheated on his girlfriend of 6 years to be with me, then married me, I was in love and he told me he has NEVER been faithful to any woman, but then he has never married any woman before so now that he is married he is totally faithful, so when i start to see him behave in the same manner he did with his ex while I was seeing him too, I start to think, hummm, could he be cheating on me too. and the answer is more than likely yes!
(and yes I know that I should have KNOWN better but, I was blinded by love!)