I think that I may be pregnant. My boyfriend doesn't have a job or a high school diploma. I feel kind of?

Question

stupid for putting myself in this situation. Do you know of any GED programs in illinois or chicago? or can I persuade him to go back to school. He's been looking for jobs and no one will hire him because he doesn't have a high school diploma. What should I do?

Answer 1

first do not get an abortion u don't know what this baby could do 4 u and maybe 4 the humanty some day ,ask ur parents 4 help and before any one ask god for help i'm sure he'll help u ,this is life, nothing is easy and that why should any one get married before having sex ...good luck

Answer 2

Listen, I am 18 and also pregnant (However I did use contraception!)...My boyfriend works and well I do ...until this following Friday as I've just been told told that people are being lay off due to business finance problems, which doesn't help whatsoever! I was in the exact same situation as you 5 weeks ago, I was 4 weeks pregnant and booked in for a check up and to arrange abortion 2 weeks later (at which I was 6 weeks, 7 by the time I would've had the abortion). I've never believed in abortion and felt pressured into it as I didn't want to disappoint my family...but you'll soon realise the support you will get!! I'm nearly 10weeks now and my family have accepted it, and fair enough I'll more than likely have to work part time until the baby is born as not many people take on pregnant women full time, but I will manage! There are benefits in which I am eligable for, but obviously I don't plan on staying on them forever! I want to make something of myself and I will because thats what I want to do...I am completely against council house mums for life! In your situation you should be eligable for Jobseekers allowance until you are heavily pregnant and then it should change to income support (which is exactly the same really). You may be entitled to child tax credit once baby's born, and a Sure Start Maternity Grant of £500 at 28 weeks I think. Also you will obviously get child benefits as every mother does...and possibly healthy start vouchers from 10weeks pregnancy which enable you to buy milk, fresh veg, fresh fruit, powder milk etcccc. But you NEED to talk to your parents about this, and go into your local Job Centre to request about benefits! Ofc It wont be easy, but what would life be like if it was?? If you have the determination to do well then you will do, stop thinking about the negatives and more about the positives...stress wont do anything good for your baby!! Good Luck! =)

Answer 3

I assume by your question that you're planning/hoping to a) have the baby and b) stay with your boyfriend for a while if you really *are* pregnant. So it seems you're looking for a real answer, here.

While I don't have any experience with your area's GED programs, I'd consider checking in some administrative office at your local school district, perhaps, because they might at least have some leads to offer. I've also heard of online/correspondence programs that wouldn't matter where you are, although I have no idea how reputable any particular ones may or may not be.

Good luck!

Answer 4

You can't make him smarter. If you intend to stick it out you need help. If you can't get counseling from either of your parents try community organizations. Someone who can put all the obstacles you face and organize them in some logical way. Someone without a high school diploma who does not realize they need to work hard and get one to get a decent job is never going to dig themselves out of the hole they are in. You need to decide what best for you and your child first and your boyfriend second.

Answer 5

is it too late for you to get an abortion? if your not working and on your own it's not fair to put all this on him, both of you are to blame. use this experience to get your life back and think the next time you get with a guy and use birth control. PEACE.

Answer 6

Yes, you'rejust as responsible as he is for the situation. You cannot make him get a high school diploma or GED; he has to want to do it himself. You can't make him be a man and take the initiative to do whatever it takes to support his child. If he's truly clueless, then do what you can to show him the way. In the meantime, take care of yourself and do whatever it takes to make sure that you're going to be okay in this situation in the event that he bails. Yes, you got into this together, but there's no guarantee you're going to stay in it together. Both of you have to do your part, and the only part that you have complete control of is yours. Stop feeling stupid (the deed is done -- worry only saps energy from today) and start taking action. First, find out if you're really pregnant. If not, start taking precautions to make sure it doesn't happen until you're truly ready. www.plannedparenthood.org
Secondly, if you are, make sure you're going to have access to proper medical care. Do research into what to expect in the coming months. There are plenty of websites if you just type in some common search terms. Try to set up a support system among your family and friends. If you're in school, stay there. A baby is no excuse for dropping out; you got in this situation, and you can come out of it successful -- it will just be a little bit more of a challenge. Check out this story from a Mills College Alumni Newsletter:

THIS DOCTOR MAKES HOUSE CALLS: JULIE VAILS, ’95
by Pat Soberanis

“You can take on a lot,” says Dr. Julie Vails, ’95,
“but you have to break it down into baby pieces
that are easily accomplished.”
That’s just one of the answers she gives when
people ask, “How did you do it?” In a classic
against-the-odds story, Julie went from teen pregnancy
to MD in just 15 years while raising two
daughters on her own. Other answers convey the fierce determination you sense the moment you meet her. “I was
brought up with a strong sense of pride,” she
says. “You either do it right or don’t do it at all.
“Also,” she admits, “I get bored easily.”
A child of poverty, Julie attended San
Francisco’s exclusive private schools on scholarship
until she became pregnant at 14. She married at
16, had her second child a year later, and by 19
found herself a single mother with a high school
diploma, living on public assistance and taking in
foster children to make ends meet. When she
decided to turn her life around, she began in a big
way, by completing a four-year legal-specialist program
in two years at a community college.
Then she came to Mills. Julie credits Mills with
inadvertently guiding her toward medicine. “I
decided to become a doctor when the Mills application
made me put something in the major category,”
she says. In her four years at Mills, she served
as copresident of the Association of Pre-Health
Science Students and graduated with honors.
“Being in classes with 14 people was beautiful for
me,” she says, as was the “incredible” math instructor
who taught the intensive precalculus course she
needed to prepare for her biology major.
Her advice to the premed students she now
mentors is highly practical. “Don’t go to college
till you’re ready to get straight A’s. Work the system
to get what you want. If you’re still deciding
what you want, do it at a community college.”
She chose the University of California, San
Francisco, over Harvard Medical School because
UCSF offered family housing. But when she finally
reached her long-sought goal as a well-paid
physician at a large medical group in Sacramento,
California, she discovered she was profoundly
unhappy.
“There’s an art to medicine,” Julie says, “and
you can’t hear the patient and do it in ten minutes.”
That’s all the time she was given per patient. “I’ve
worked at five or six urgent care clinics, in emergency
rooms, and at a large medical group. All of
them were the same.”
So in November 2002 she took her fierce
determination and strong sense of pride and
opened her own office, Vails Family Practice, in Elk
Grove, just outside of Sacramento. Her 19-year-old,
Genevieve Vails-Dobson, is the office manager, and
her four-year-old, Isabella, flits in and out of the
examination rooms. Her middle daughter, 17-yearold
Gabrielle, recently graduated from high school.
“Here, I can treat patients according to their
own philosophy and their own approach to their
health.”
As anyone who has felt shunted through the
brave new world of managed health care will recognize
instantly, Julie’s approach is her patients’ blessing.
She spends a full hour with new patients and 30
minutes in follow-up sessions, offers cotton gowns,
and takes a whole-person, whole-family approach to
health care. She even makes occasional house calls.
“My patients are extremely loyal,” Julie says
of the thousand or so on her roster. “We have a
very high staff-patient ratio, great customer service,
food and drink, music, back massage, fountains,
tons of plants. It’s comfortable, not sterile.
“We also have a new-patient orientation,” she
adds. “Patients are expected to do their part.
We’re not going to make them take their pill.
We’re not here to get yelled at. If they call and
say their prescription is going to run out tomorrow,
I say, ‘Why did you wait till the last minute?’”
It’s a tradeoff they’re happy to make. “My
office is filled with thank-you letters,” Julie says.
As for the tradeoff all women face—family
versus career—Julie is typically frank. “Dr. Laura
says you can’t do both, and in reality, you can’t.
“My motto is ‘Love the struggle,’ because the
truth is, it’s not going to go away.”