How can I convince my older sister to see my mom who's dying?

Question

I'm 17, she's 24. When she was 14, she made mistakes, joined bad crowds, lied, was mean to me. Our parents ended up giving her a harsh punishment, though she apologized and promised to change. She got devastated because they said she had lost their trust and their trust was very important to her. I remember this broke her spirit, she suffred a lot but my parents were firm and it took months for them to trust her again. She changed, ended up being a great sister, made our parents proud but never made up w/ them, even today she thinks they were cruel, unforgiving, broke her spirit, didn't act as loving parents. Their attempts to make up with her didn't work. Today she's graduated, has a good job, still a great sister but hasn't talked with our parents for more than 2 years. She's about to get married and her in laws love her. Unfortunately mom is dying and wants to see her but she refuses, says it'll be kinda painful for both. I begged but she refused, see no point in this.

I agree my parents were too harsh on her and see her poit, but they thought they love her and to mom it'll be teriible to die without making up with her

Answer 1

Am so sorry, but you can't force it. The pain or the reality of seeing your mother might to much for her to bear. I think she fails to realize that because of that treatment she is the way she is now. If it wasn't for your parents to put their feet down, she probably would of still been hanging with bad company. Since you ask her to many times, go to her fiancee confidentally and ask him to step in and talk to her. Explain to him exactly what you just explain. Maybe this will help.

Answer 2

Sounds to me like your parents did a great job.... Being a parent means doing what is right and not what is popular... Look at the results.. Your sister is thriving....

These are the sacrifices we make for our children and once your sister has children she may begin to understand.... Too bad for her that it will probably be too late and she will have to live with the guilt.... Some people are too blinded by pride to have the maturity it takes to move past certain difficulties... Hopefully your sister will grow up and be able to put this behind her.... But that is not your burden

You did your best...

Answer 3

Sorry your loved ones has continued plenty. tell your sister that residing with be apologetic approximately is a unfavorable ingredient. and each so often you extremely would desire to head away the previous in the back of. tell her to look at her lifestyles top now. Ask her how she thinks she might've became out in the adventure that your father and mom hadn't have been confusing on her? the place might she be as a exchange?

Answer 4

Although you can't force her, you can do your best to try and convince her. It sounds like both your sister and your mother need some sort of closure. That is one of the things you can talk to her about.

Your mother wants to see her and that is a start. Obviously your sister needs to hear this if she hasn't already. They do not need to talk about the past as that would make it more difficult.

I giving this advice because my mother passed away about 8 years ago. I had not spoken with my mother in 15 years before she died due to what me and my siblings went through during our childhood. I did not want to speak with her. I now regret the fact that that I made that decision.

Your sister may regret it later in life as well. Again, do your best to try and convince her but do not force her. Good luck and I am sorry for what you are going through.

Answer 5

In my opinion u should tell her that Parents have the right to tell their kids what's right & what's wrong. When she will become 1 parent as well then she will find out what parents are all about. So for her good sake she needs to come and see her mom before it's too late!
Because if she don't she will regret her whole life!
Hope it works!

Answer 6

so sorry u have to go through this wow 17 is young for a person to lose its parents ur sister obviously has a cold heart and does not appreciate them look at her has a good job and stuff if it wasnt for her parents she would be probably with a kid and working at burger king she will understand wen shes older but itll be a little too late and shell have to live with that guilt i hope everything goes well for u

Answer 7

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. Just don't try to force her, but say, "Hey, Brittany (or whatever her name is), do you want to come with me to see mom? I know you don't want to, but I think you'll really regret not seeing Mom. This is your last chance to make things right. I know mom and dad were a little harsh, but they only did it because they loved you. She loved you so much, and I just wish you would return the favor to her. " I am praying for you that you and your family will get through this together.

God Bless

{peace}

Answer 8

tell her that your mom wants to apoligize. then tell your mom should apoligize just to make everything better. that shoud work

i will tell you a true story.

i was baptized on april 18 of '93. my mom and dad had that choice or the 20 something of april. my grandma attended. my parents went on a vacation to north carolina to camp with with their first kid. well they only stayed a few days when they were gonna stay a week.

why? becuase my grandma died on the 23rd due to a heart attack. my mom was devistated. she was not extrememly close, but it was her mom!!!! she never got to say good bye or i love you.

she still regrets it. my grandpa go t back on his feet and is happily married again. my mom is happy for him. but every time he has a chest pain or something happens, she makes up drop what we are doing and go see him. we have even canceled our vacation twice so that she can be with him incase he dies.

show this story to your sister. dont let this be her case. it crushed my mom and no one should have to live with this. it is a horrible fate. you need to get your sister to your mom so thta your mo does not die without saying good bye and your sister does not have to live with it for the rest of her life.

this should also clear things up with your dad so that she can say good bye to him too when it is his time

Answer 9

i dont have a really good anwser but you should say to your sister that in the bible it says that as many error there parents do they should be forgiven tell her if her mom dyies she will suffer for that action the rest of her live she tell her that u just wish for her to stop behaving that way

Answer 10

Call your sister and let her know that your mtoher wants to see her. Tell her that when you watch someone die its hard. It is even harder when you aren't there and they do die.