When you were dating you probably thought about what kind of husband and/or father your boyfriend would be right? Were you right about your prediction? Specifics please.
2007-10-04 03:01:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He turned out to be a better father than I expected, but unfortuneltly the husband part was lacking!!
He didn't have his father around when he was growing up, so I always worried that he may have trouble bonding with his kids! That wasn't the case. We have 4 boys and he loves them very much! He coaches their sports, he helps them with homework, he takes them golfing and camping....etc....
However, he has never really understood what it is to be a husband. He hasn't ever been the "man" of the house. All the responsibilities seemed to fall on my shoulders. He was very neglectful emotionally and physically, and unable to communicate. In my opinion, both people in a relationship have to give 100%. There will be times when one feels weak and the other has to step up and be the rock, but overall, you both have to work at making the relationship last. Not the way things worked for us.
2007-10-04 03:17:56 · answer #1 · answered by Kailey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, but i dont think anyone turns out exactly how u thought they were going to be when u were dating because while ur dating your on that giddy cloud nine.. and ur showing each other ur best qualities for the most part, and it takes time and living together before the real you and him come out..
Now i will say.. he is a great dad, one of the things that attracted me the most to him.. he's not perfect.. but u get him around kids and he turns into a big kid himself..
Husband.. he's a good husband dont get me wrong, i just thought it would be different.. im the 2nd wife, and well i didnt realize how far on the totem pole u are when ur the 2nd wife.. always having to accomadate the x wife at times sux.. or being made to feel ur feelings come last to others.. can be very trying.. and i didnt realize just how much of myself i would have to sacrafice until after we were married, even if i saw hints of it prior to, i guess i thought the vows would of made things change there.. but at times it actually just made things worse because now your obligated to , or he counts on you for more where the x and children are concerned.. but with every marriage there is always an obsticle and problems and if u love each other enough u find away to make it work out..
2007-10-04 03:10:21 · answer #2 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was completely wrong. I met my daughter's father when I was 14, he was my first, at 16. (he waited that long). I was so in love with him and you couldn't tell me nothing. He was so nice, and caring, and I just loved everything about him. Well, when I was 17 I got pregnant. I begged him to put up the money for an abortion because I was too young to be a mom, and I hadn't finished high school yet. besides I knew my mom would flip. Well he was saying how he always wanted a baby by me, and how nice it would be, and how he would get a part time job and go to school while I was pregnant and then by the time the baby came, he would have his certification in whatever trade he took up. Basically he had his priorities straight, at least that's what I thought. The entire time I was pregnant, he started sleeping with other girls, the girls would call his house while I was there and they would tell me everything. He would of course deny everything. So I broke up with him. I was 4 months pregnant and didn't see him until I went in labor. he showed up at the hospital high as a kite, he didn't say much to me at all. My sister and his sister was there. I went in labor on Febraury 12, 2002 and had my daughter February 14, 2002. So we where there for quite a long time, not saying anything to each other. One week later, I had a baby shower, It looked like christmas in my house. I had everything I needed, but he didn't buy one thing. He would steal from his family to buy my baby stuff, and I would end up replacing their money feeling guilty. He was then arrested for gun and drug pocession. and never paid a dime of child support. He tried to take me to court for vistitation rights and was awarded every other weekend, but guess what, he is back in jail. I'm doing ten times better my daughter is five now, in school and not missing a thing about him,but to answer your question, hell no.
2007-10-04 03:18:05 · answer #3 · answered by Paradise 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes he turned out to be the husband/father I thought he would. And the best. Although other things when we started to live together was a mess. But in any relationship things always look good on outside but when you actually get to know the person its different just always be ready and figure out how you would work out the flaws.
2007-10-04 03:05:54 · answer #4 · answered by hershey 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got married Friday Sept 28 so I'm not really sure yet, but when we were dating I was a little scared that he wouldnt be mature with his money and that he would be lazy around the house BUT so far in the 6 days we have been married LOL, he has really proven that he wants this and he wants to be a great husband, so far so good!
2007-10-04 03:10:40 · answer #5 · answered by Mrs. Hadaway 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Me and my husband recently got married, it is a second marriage for the both of us. We both learned from the mistakes we made in our first marriage and try to work out and make issues that arise a priority. He is a wonderful, thoughtful husband who is always thinking of ways to be romantic by writing little poems, leaving sexy phone or text messages, sending flowers, remembering special occasions etc etc. So for now, yes I am very happy with him and he also says he is happy with me. We have had our ups and downs but were able to talk it over and come to a compromise.
2007-10-04 03:13:59 · answer #6 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well truth is I saw the signs and behavior so I should have known better.... needless to say.... I always hoped for change..."oh he will change"......hope on top of hope...
In reality...when we dated...
-he never held onto a job- anger problem with bosses and colleagues
-irrational
-short tempered
-controlling
-was even abusive
-was fooling around
-was taking drugs
on and on....
Predicament...hum.... yep...exactly...there were no pretenses ..he was exactly the person he portrayed, only in my mind of fantasy I pretended he was the man he wasn't.
So in this case.. it's a lesson... to share with others -never live in hope...you can never change anyone and you only get what you allow.
Wakey wakey everyone in bubbleland!
P.S... he is my ex.... x file!
2007-10-04 03:17:57 · answer #7 · answered by Say 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
And then some! He's one of those hands on fathers. He's always there for me. He still makes me laugh! I had a feeling about all of this and it's nice to see that I was right. :)
2007-10-04 03:08:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
These all sound good & depending on the situation, they might work. But a sure fire, 100% weapon that we have against women is.......................wait 4 it..........::.........LYING!! It will work each & every time!! That is until u get caught up, then u will lose her forever!! That is unless u come with another lie that she believes AGAIN!! LOL......Now the best way is NOT 2 lie, ignore what I was talking about, & us humor as mentioned before!! Good Luck!!
2016-05-20 22:22:02 · answer #9 · answered by joel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I KNEW THAT MY HUSBAND WOULD BE A GREAT FATHER WHEN WE WERE DATING CUZ HE TOOK GREAT CARE OF MY TWO OLDEST KIDS LIKE THEY WERE HIS OWN,A WHOLE LOT BETTER THAN THIER REAL FATHER DID. WE HAD ONE OF OUR OWN A YEAR LATER,AND HE TREATS THEM 100% THE SAME. WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER 13 YEARS AND MARRIED 10. HES GREAT
2007-10-04 03:34:21 · answer #10 · answered by TABBYKAT34 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋