Are we doing enough?

Question

......in todays society to ensure our children will grow up safely?
What with gun crimes, murder, neglect etc on the uprise, what more can we do to promote good values in our children so this sort of thing is not what they grow up thinking is the norm?

Obviously we can teach them respect and right from wrong, but can we truely shield them from outside influences?

Answer 1

Hi MiMi - I'm very glad mine are grown. With behavioural differences becoming more pronounced, I can only envisage society fracturing even more. Children are being raised in fairly enclosed environments, where only their own social values are fostered. I had to bring my children up to see outside influences for what they are and deal with them from a fairly early age. If children love, respect and trust their parents, they will not want to hurt them and try harder to keep straight. If, however, they see those same parents living and behaving with double standards and hypocrisy - that is a recipe for disaster.

Answer 2

Of course you can't shield children from outside influences and why should you. You have them from birth and the standards you show them and teach them from birth as basically what they will go through life with. Of course some people have personality disorders but most kids keep the standards set by their parents. Someone said and I am so old I cant remember who "Give me the boy until he is seven and I will give you the man" As to the vast increases in crimes you are so worried about I don't think that is happening. Of course crime goes up as the population increases and patterns of crime change so some crimes increase while other decline but of course the newspapers will only report the increases. (Who believes more that half of what they read in newspapers). Just teach the kids the best values you can, stop worrying about it and get on with life.

Answer 3

I think that the way of the world changes with each new generation and its always going to be for what is perceived as the worse. Its not something that can necessarily be changed, part of it is simply evolution.

Respect, manners and knowing right from wrong are the basics that all parents should teach their kids and I think that it'd do everyone good to remember that we only ever hear the bad stuff, the good that young people and teenagers do today is never headline news. Shame really, the good outweighs the bad probably a hundred times over.

Answer 4

Actually these things are happening no more today than they were many years ago. The Media is what makes people believe it is getting so bad.As far as my son goes i try to not let him watch the evening news or prime time TV. I do however let him watch discovery or history channel. I let him see that yes there are dangerous people and places because i don't want him growing up thinking these things do not exist. And then when he finds out he'd think i was lying.I don't want to put him in a bubble and i explain to him the best i can why some people are the way they are. In this way i think he will be better prepared for the real world.

Answer 5

We are not doing enough in some areas, doing TOO much in others.

Areas such as decent socialisation we are clearly not doing enough. Kids need to be taught morals and values and ethics primarily from good parenting from a mother AND a father, then secondary socialisation from schools, media, church, etc etc.

Areas such as giving them too many rights and wrapping them up in cotton wool through a nanny state, we are doing far too much.

Let kids run around and climb trees, skin a knee or get a bruised head from falling out of said tree.
Let kids get punished by their school and parents, and get a clip from a policeman without the social services and the state getting involved and ruining everyones lives.

That's what we need to do for kids.

Answer 6

No I don't think we can. I have 5 kids 2 teenagers. 1 of my teenagers rarely ever gets in trouble. He is organized does great in school and gives 100% effort in anything he does. My 14 year old is a good kid but gives us the most trouble. He is smart but is lazy at school and sometimes does things just to tick us off on purpose. He is brave because he is not afraid to test us. While the others fear the consequences. He is a follower and seems drawn in to the bad kids at school but never gets in trouble himself. He is really small for his age so it maybe a safety thing I don't know. He doesnt talk much at school and is shy. We are Christians and all of my kids love church he hates it. He is definitely the more rebellious one and while he and his brother are like salt and pepper they have been raised exactly the same. I am hoping this is a fase and just relates to hormones, puberty etc. but I do keep my eye on him closer these days because of the influences at school. The kids he hangs out with outside of school are not the ones he sits with at lunch and talks to at school. Total opposite. I won't allow it.

Answer 7

According to the FBI the general crime rate is down, specifically violent crimes. The immediacy of the internet, plus the constant news channels, makes it seem as it is on the rise but the facts say otherwise.

It is the impression of increasing crime that you are questioning, actually. What can we do to promote good values to our children? This starts in the home, with the parents. We, meaning society in general, do not have the constant contact with your children that you do. We, as in society in general, have practically no control over what your children read, watch on TV, play on the computer/XBox, etc. You, the parent, are in control of this.

In a more rational sense, your question can thus be more properly phrased as "What can I, as a parent, do to ensure my children learn positive values?" Monitor and control what they see and hear. What they read (books, newspapers, magazines), what they see (TV, movies, games, your own behavior) willl influence the values they learn.

To put it much more bluntly and possibly even rudely - it is not our, as in society in general, job to raise your children. It's your job. We, as in society in general, do expect you to do a good job at it. We, as in society in general, are not to blame if you fail to do so.

Answer 8

I think it comes down to the way you raise your kids but you cannot wrap them up in cotton wool. Children need to be taught respect nowadays, when I was a kid I wouldn't dream of talking to strangers the way kids do nowadays. There is far too much gore in videogames and DVD's too for a young audience, teaching kids that guns in reality kill or seriously damage what they are pointed at is a good place to start

Answer 9

Children need to be taught respect and values from an early age. Unfortunately not everyone does teach their children these things anymore and they let them run riot. If children don't have respect for authority when they are young they will never have it when they grow up either.

Answer 10

One of the biggest problems with our society today is lack of parent control. Absent fathers, watching violent movies and no respect for people are but a few reasons for today's problem. Maybe we need laws for bad parenting??