Guy i met online...?

Question

I met a guy online, we've been chatting, we basically know each other's life stories, there is a connection. We have been talking since the end of august, havent met yet, havent talked on the phone either. He seems to good to be true, he tells me the same. I recently found out that he had also been chatting with a friend of mine he met on a similar website! I guess my friend hadnt been talking to him much, and when he found out he asked her a lot about me, said he thought he was in love, etc. She told him well then you two should meet, he said, well that's an understatment.she said, well do it then, he said, well will. SO...why isnt he wanting to meet up? Am i being a fool? Oh yeah his myspace is all women, but he has deleted a few of the people i asked him too

yeah i'm a bit turned off that he had contacted my friend of all people...ugh. I'm 30...getting too old for this.

Answer 1

"Too good to be true" and "Am I being a fool"

The answer to both questions is YES!

Answer 2

It sounds like this guy will talk to any woman that will talk back. Why doesn't he want to meet up? Perhaps he isn't being as honest as you think. Set a time limit and if he doesn't want to meet then stop talking to him. I've seen people in chat rooms get screwed over by people that they thought they had a "connection" with. One guy chatted with a woman for over a year only to find out it was all a big lie. Very sad and a huge waste of time. Meeting online initially is one thing, being able to continue the relationship and move it out of the virtual world is another. If he doesn't seem to be able to do so he is lying about something. You know there are red flags here or you wouldn't even be questioning it. Make note of these things and call him on it. Good luck :)

Answer 3

Hi... BEWARE of men on line... while it's true we don't have a lot of time to get out and meet people, many people who we meet on line can be a little bit goofy... and needy.

I have met a couple of men on line, and one of them i dated for about 15 months... EVERYTHING he said about himself was a complete lie, and the entire time we were together, he was nice enough, but he continued registering for dating websites and put himself "out there" (although he claimed our was an exclusive relationship... ).. duh.

I don't see anything wrong with meeting the guy to see if you have things in common in person. If he won't meet up with you maybe he's a liar too? God knows, i don't.

And i don't see why you'd have to ask this guy to delete people from his myspace? Isn't that a little forward?

What is someone over 30 doing with a myspace page anyway? Seems to me that website is for teenagers? I could be wrong, but i've looked at myspace, and it's not for me.. (i'm over 30).

A person can't be "in love" with someone they never met.

I have heard Eharmony is a good, and safer place to meet people -- probably because there is a fee and many people who go there are looking for a serious relationship; however there are goofballs everywhere.

Answer 4

I cant be the judge of that hon :) But be careful. I too have experienced guys trying to whoo me online. But sadly in the end most just wanted me to web cam and show my body to them. The minute I said no, they were gone. Keep asking this man if he wants to meet you. If he keeps denying then it seems too fishy. He may not be telling the truth. But then he could be very shy and think once youve seen him you wont like him. To talk on the phone or see live pics would be best. Its always good to be honest when in a relationship. Before it gets so envolved that once you see eachother and find that its not what you were told or no connection....you can end the relationship easier.

I have had friends who met online and are married. So things can be good, but you must be cautious as a woman....this world is so crazy.

Answer 5

I have been chatting to a guy on line for about 3 years. I live in Australia and he lives in Canada. There was an obvious connection right from the start. I am going over to the U.S in the middle of next year. Since he has known this he has been a little more obvious. He had said to me, "I want to meet you, but I dont" The reason he doesnt want to meet me is because he is frightened that I may light a fire in him, then I will have to come home to Australia. There is an obvious connection with us both....I feel the same as he does. I guess the simple answer is we dont want to be hurt. That is usually the motive behind someone not wanting to meet someone else. This guy I have been chatting to has been hurt terribly in other relationships. He cannot deny his feelings, but he is also afraid. I can certainly relate to your man's apprehension. We dont know what it will be like when we meet, because sometimes what we share on-line doesnt turn out how we really feel when we meet. The only way both of you will know if you "click" is by meeting. Both of you need to get rid of the fear. Maybe suggest to him that meeting for coffee may be a good start. Don't expect anything...just meet as friends and see where it leads. Don't have any expectations and tell him not to have any either. That way you will feel more comfortable when you meet. As much as you feel for him now...maybe it wont be the case if you meet in person. Just relax....telll him to relax....meet as friends, then decide how you both feel about each other. Both of you need to relax a lot. Meet as friends with no expectations then maybe he will feel more comfortable in meeting with you.

Answer 6

'been talking since the end of august' . that is only a little over a month - that isn't that long. I don't see a need to rush in and meet each other. Why not talk on the phone as friends first? maybe suggest that if you are wanting it to go farther- tell him to call you. (no, you don't call him - if he's a player - he wants the girls to call him). Just say..heres my phone number-- call me sometime if you want. I think that will tell you alot - if he's thinking of moving forward...or, like my space ---etc... to alot of people.. its just a 'game'...or something to do. hopefully you are not getting more into it then him.

Answer 7

He must be just living in his "dream world" and doesn't want to deal with the reality. The other possibility is that he posted a 10-year old pic of himself and looks nothing like it in real life. Or he is married/ In any case, if he REALLY wanted, he would be anxious to meet in person right away.

By the way, 30 is way too young/.

Answer 8

I did (though we did not meet on a dating site. In in the end we still fell for each other. Long story. However it is common for men on dating sites really not to remain friends as they are actively seeking a relationship and do not wish to complicate things with a new gf by having female friends they met the same way

Answer 9

Before you meet someone you talk to online try talking on the phone for a few months first. Unless he's a good actor it's harder to fake things when you're talking on the phone. Sounds to me like he's playing you though, I'd back off a little and see what he does.

Answer 10

You never know unless you meet. That is the only way to answer this question. If he doesn't want to meet, time to move on. I give them 2 tries. I can understand canceling one, but twice tells me you don't want to meet. Or if they always say we should meet but never follow through with nailing down a time or date....that tells me that they aren't really interested in meeting people, but more likely just F*ing around on the net.

Answer 11

Maybe you should be a little more careful, I mean he could be like a 90 year old creepy guy, I mean you never know lol. And maybe he doesn't want to meet up because he has a girlfriend, Just be careful and don't trust someone you don't really know yet.