my boyfriend is taking this badly..i just learned last night..when we argued.. it's hurting him inside because he keeps it bottled up and i wanna help him but i don't know what to do!! what should we do? should we just not care?
2007-10-03 23:23:25 · 21 answers · asked by ♥MiSSYC♥ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your boyfriend should have a quiet chat with his father to let him know that he's upset about what may or may not be the truth.
2007-10-03 23:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Sally Anne 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
1. Be a good sounding board like you have been.
2. Tell your boyfriend to ask his mom if she wants him to:
......A. Lie to her to keep her happy
......B . Tell her something he suppects strongly that will make her worry
......C. Tell her something he knows to be true that will make her like miserable
And P.S. no one died.
If she wants a hint, tell her it is about Dad. Now she has to answer A, B, or C.
Whichever way she wants to live her life (A, B, or C) is her decision.
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He can ask her why she feels that way, however, just to get some idea of how she thinks. (She make like to think if the words aren't said, it is all pretend, and her ego is too fragile to handle anything else. On the other hand, they may have an "open marriage" and the boyfriend just hasn't seen Mommy when she is out of the house.
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Never let him feel guilty about possibly breaking a family up - because HE is part of the family, too. THEY are the ones who are fooling themselves.
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I think the truth, said kindly and soberly, is better than a lie.
2007-10-03 23:50:52 · answer #2 · answered by Tina Goody-Two-Shoes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's sure his dad is cheating, your boyfriend needs to talk to him, not you. You have nothing to do with this. Neither should you have any opinion about it, since you don't know what's going on. Don't argue about this. In this instance, there is no "what should WE do" to consider. Stay out of it!
2007-10-04 01:02:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend's Dad is not your or your boyfriend's problem, he's a dirt bag and he will end up with a boat load of problems when it catches him, and it will! Stay as far away from it as you can, it will only bite you hard if you stick any part of your body in it, trust me you'll be so grateful if you listen to this advice!
2007-10-04 00:08:19 · answer #4 · answered by want2flybye 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stand by him. What he need most now, other than solutions to his family matters, it will be you. You are one of the ppl that will be closest to him. So no matter what happens, you should be staying calm and not fall. If you fall, he wouldnt have anyone to depend you. And anyway, i dont think you can do much to help to solve out his family matters. But you can do much in helping your boyfriend emotionally in this period of hard time for him. Taking more notice of him helps.
2007-10-04 00:04:25 · answer #5 · answered by Kitano 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend needs to do something about it. If he really loves his mother, then he should do the right thing and that is to tell her what his father is doing behind her back. Another way to fix this is if your boyfriend knows who is that woman who his father is cheating with behind his mothers' back, and knows where they will meet one day, he should take his mother and himself and follow his father to where he is going without the father knowing that they are following him, that way, his mother will know that her husband is cheating on her. All your boyfriend needs to do is just show his mother proof that his father is really cheating on her so then she will believe her son.
Trust me this is the right thing to do, because if he keeps quiet about it, one day, the secret will be out and its gonna hurt his mother alot, so he better act fast before its too late. Good luck with decision!
2007-10-03 23:47:43 · answer #6 · answered by Dark Angel 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Since you and your boyfriend argued, you have to mend this first, and concentrate on your relationship with your boyfriend.
His parents are adults, let them work it out in their own way, and you need to work and mend your relationship from the argument you had with your boyfriend.
Just comfort him, and love him, and care for him, he needs you more than ever, now is the time for you both to learn from his parents mistakes and do not make the same ones yourself.
2007-10-03 23:31:00 · answer #7 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
tell your boyfriend that your there for him any time he wants to talk about it tell him that talking about the problem is good u know that it will make him feel good to let his feelings out better than keep it inside good luck
2007-10-03 23:34:01 · answer #8 · answered by christena 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
We can't tell you if you should care, you're entitled to your feelings. You can tell him that you know this must be bothering him inside, and if he needs to talk/vent you're here. I don't know what more you can do.
2007-10-04 01:55:31 · answer #9 · answered by purplebee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ouch that is bad. i think u should support him and tell him that the parents still love him no matter what. tell him that his dad is doing wrong and he should not blame him himself and he should not argue and i know that he is not taking well and just be there for him
2007-10-03 23:32:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋