What do you think of my new poem?

Question

Black Rose.

The fragile black rose,
Alone in the street,
Frightened to move,
But brought to its feet,
By a mystical mind,
Hidden in shadows,
Reluctant to stir,
In the mist of an arrow.
Taking her petal,
By his right hand,
Feeling its texture,
A rough contraband,
An emotion so high,
His hand did run deep,
Relating his fear,
Of never to sleep.
By its thorn it did prick,
Poising syrup for him to sip,
Goodbye to the stranger,
The clock has struck twelve,
Into the shadows,
It did delve.

Actually the arrow represents the everlasting image in the mind of the attack, a symbol of anothers bling rage over you and all that it entails.

Answer 1

I really, really like this poem. It has a smooth flow and I love the first sentences "The fragile black rose, Alone in the street, Frightened to move, But brought to its feet," A very strong sentence.
Great poem.

Answer 2

This image of arrow is simply anomalous and awkward:

Hidden in shadows,
Reluctant to stir,
In the mist of an arrow

How and when can an arrow have mist?
"Poising"???

This opening is quit well thought out and marvelous:

The fragile black rose,
Alone in the street,
Frightened to move,
But brought to its feet,
By a mystical mind,

Answer 3

I have mixed feelings on this one.
It sounds good.
It's a bit confusing.
Seems to ramble a bit.
In places it seems the subject was obscured in order to get the rhyme.

Answer 4

Someone who publishes such things takes great risks. Have you ever read Vogun poetry?

Answer 5

that was absolutely excellent!! I really like that.I use to write poems but not as good as yours. Press on!!

Answer 6

This is good, really good. Great job!!! Can't wait to read more of your poetry.

Answer 7

i like it . its deep