why can't i say i love you!?

Question

It kills me right now that i can't say i love you to my family. Why is this?

Answer 1

Depending on how old you are, perhaps you didn't hear it much when you were growing up.
Other reasons of not being able to say I love you can be of fear.
I myself have a hard time saying it to some of my family, not all. I never heard it from our dad, and since our mom had died, that means we never heard it at all, that is why I find it difficult, plus I tend not to say it unless I really mean it because I don't want to be saying it to someone and have them all weird about it, plus I want the person I say it to, to know that I really mean those words, because if you use those words loosely such as "I love this song", it's hard for that person that you say it to, to really believe it. So I want them to really know that i do mean those words.
So if you are anything like me, I find it difficult to say because I didn't hear it when I was growing up. I feel weird saying it to my family but don't have problems saying it to my son (of course, because I want him to grow up knowing I do love him, and to be able to say it later and also know that I do, not only through my actions) and some of my closest friends, but most of the time I say it only if they say it to me, probably because of the fear that maybe they don't feel the same way or even if they do feel the same, that you won't hear it back.
My other fear of not saying I love you is every time I say it, it means that I gave a little piece of my heart to that person, and perhaps not every time, but it's always been taken away from me somehow, someway, and I don't want to deal with that hurt. So you think if you keep those words inside, if that happens then maybe it won't hurt so bad in the future.
I do have one suggestion though, to perhaps make it a lot easier, and to ignore those feelings is this. "You never know what the future brings, you don't know what will happen tomorrow, much less in the next 5 minutes, so believe it's the last time that person will ever hear those words even if it's not, and know with that sense of urgency that they need to hear it for fear they may never get the chance again.
If you really love someone, make sure they know it through your words and actions because you never know what will happen and if you will get the chance again. Be it the most important thing you do on an every day basis, you make sure that those people that you love know that you do, because you never know when it will be the last time you will get to tell them or show them.
I'm not trying to make that sound depressive, that's not how I want you to think when you think those thoughts, just think about them with an urgency and it might be easier to get those words out to them. You don't want to miss those moments, they are the most important ones. Not only tell them, but make sure that they see it through actions as well.
It might be fear, it might be how you grew up, it might be something that has not been named here because I don't know what happened in your life, but fear of saying I love you might just be a little fear of not hearing it said back.
Good luck with it, but just examine your feelings and think about why you can't. Are you afraid of something, if you are then that's probably your answer of why you can't. It's truly something only you can answer, you just have to think about it, and maybe it will take some time, but it will come to you, in the meantime, let all reservations go, and just say it, you might be surprised to see or hear your family reactions. Guarantee it will make someone's day, or it might even bring you closer together. You never know, and I don't know if they say it to you, but if they aren't maybe they are feeling the same way you do. Try it, hope it works.

Answer 2

My Father NEVER said it.
Maybe as a child it wasn't said to him.
Lucky for me my Mother was a very loving
Woman. People knew it just by being in her
company.

Start saying " I Love You " ,
so your Family, and Friends can have
that memory.

Answer 3

Maybe because you never heard it growing up but if it kills u so much try and say it or try and get your family to say it to you

Answer 4

you just might not have been raised that way...some family just arent all into the i love you..thank you think..because your so tight knit..they already know you do....its fine

Answer 5

Probably because you didnt hear it much. Dont let it bother you.

Answer 6

When you find out, let me know.