How many women actually stand to benefit (financially) from "trapping" their Bf's with a pregnancy?

Question

I often find it hilarious when guys say women are doing this soooo often. I dated a guy once who (I soon discovered) had some weird women issues. He once said he often worried a girl would do this to him. It made me laugh- he made about 12 grand a year delivering pizzas. I tried to explain to him that any child support I could legally get from him would barely put a dent in my new baby expenses, let alone give me a dime to spend on myself.

Seems to me the guy would have to be pretty rich for a girl to actually "live off of" the child support. So why do so many men here seem to think that this is such a common tactic?

They say the average child support payment in the US is $250 a month. Seems like that wouldn't go too far even in regards to expenses for the child.

Answer 1

200 dollars a month is peanuts. Having raised five children I can attest to the fact that barely covers the cost of music lessons, shoes, or braces. I don't need a man to support me or my children as I have always had a lucrative career and made excellent money.

Answer 2

Dear oh dear....You seem a little naive about how this game is played....What a woman must do to make this "trap" work is to have multiple men get her pregnant. If a woman has a child or several children by a pizza delivery boy, she is going to be poor all her life. If she has one child by one man, and later another child by another man, and so on, the support checks never end. Also this method insures that if one father turned deadbeat or for that matter dead, there are still others to pay up. If the woman in question also has the insight to "trap" professional men with good jobs, the support checks are much more than $250.00. Done correctly this method can and does provide a six figure income for being a MOTHER.

Answer 3

An excellent point. The way I've always seen it, child support payments are based on the man's income, adjusted by the number of children.

Now, that's not to say I haven't seen vindictive women who will get as much out of the man, hurt-wise, as possible. If that means demanding maximum child support and making sure dad can't visit on the child's birthday, so be it. That is usually where the fear of commitment thing comes in. All of us males have heard stories, if not seen first hand (often from the behaviors of our mothers) how a woman can flip crazily with seemingly no provocation. This is where the fear of commitment comes in, we genuinely fear the duplicity of our potential partner. Overall, men trust women even less (if you can believe it) than women trust men. We have all been warned to look out for the woman who does a 180, as soon as the echo of the vows dies out. To be fair, men often do the same thing, in a very stereotypical way.

Back to topic, I've seen more and more women bitten by their greed as they repeatedly try to get more out of the baby daddy. I've seen girls lose child support, custody, and even visitation rights because they went to court so many times they came under close scrutiny themselves. To me, this only proves that it is only the most petty, uninformed women who try to pull this sort of thing off in the first place.

I think if more women saw this the way you do, it would be far, far less common. While the 'baby trap' used to be very common, I think, like you say, it is far less common these days than many men make it out to be. In those fellas defense, though, if he makes 20K a year or less, it is very unlikely that his GF is a CEO. She probably makes the same or a little less than him, making the trap a very valid fear.

After all, if baby momma lives with her mother and auntie in a 2 bedroom apartment, already, another 200 bucks a month or so becomes well worth it, since she has the baby anyway. At that kind of living standard, 200 bucks a month is like an additional week's paycheck, and that's heady wine when you could eliminate a household bill or two.

I'm not saying this is all that widespread, I'm just saying that it is something to take into consideration, from the male POV. The guy you mention obviously had some trust issues. That said, I think it is of the utmost importance to examine your partner's family dynamic. If he has unresolved trust issues with his mom, he will likely have them with all women, until he faces up to his feelings about his mommy.

I would like to add that the women who do this sort of thing are thinking about a power or cable bill, or getting their hair done, not music lessons, college tuition, or braces. It is a given that the children in the pertinent demographic will never have any of those things.

Answer 4

Actually, you are wrong. According to the US census, the average child support amount *received* was $307 in 1997. It was $320 in 1999.
In 2001, among mothers due support, the mean annual amount due was $5138 ($428/mo); 19% were due $1–$2000 ($1-166/mo) and 35% were due $5000 ($416.66/mo) or more. Among poor mothers amounts due were somewhat lower; the mean was $4,057 ($338/mo), with 28% due $2000 ($166/mo) or less, and 26% due $5000 ($416/mo) or more.

Agreed that $12,000/year is not an impressive amount but considering that any tax-free income (which is what child support is actuality) is a bonus for a woman who wants to play house with a real baby. He is right to be concerned when his income increases (as in upon graduation), child support also increases. This does not take in to account the fact that most states routinely and often raise the percentage of child support to income ratios every year or two. Also, it is not unheard of that judges will “impute” his income, which means the judge sets the amount the judge feels he *should or could be* earning.

And there is no law, rule, regulation or judicial oversight as to where the “child support” money actually goes. For many, it goes to the wants of the custodial parent first, then trickles down to the children.

A good example of this is that of Marcia Clark during the O.J. Simpson trial. This case illuminates how women have been trained to believe they are entitled to everything. She requested an increase in child support based on the fact that she, being in the national limelight, needed more money to buy appropriate clothing for herself, have her hair and nails done, etc. At the time, she was making approximately twice what the father was earning ($90,000 versus $36,000).

Reading through the answers, I am appalled by the lack of factual knowledge (or perhaps outright attempts to misinform).

To more explicitly answer your question "How many women actually stand to benefit (financially) from "trapping" their Bf's with a pregnancy?", the answer is "most of them" and it is through the illusion of getting to play house and have someone else finance the decision whether in whole or in part.

Answer 5

The guy delivers pizza. Give 'em a break. He's not making money with his brain.

I've also seen child support payments that are $3,000 and higher. Which is insane. Some people would be happy to make 3 grand a month at a job. It shouldn't be scaled up so harshly. Good thing I don't have any children out there.

As far as the whole trap thing... I doubt it happens much. But, enough to keep it in mind if you are earning enough money to be a target.

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Oh, on somewhat of a side note. There are also women who would go to a sperm bank and get preg just because they want a baby. But wait! Why not get it for free AND collect a monthly income on it? Morals are the only thing stopping her... the only thing.

Answer 6

I'm not sure

it was estimated that parents spend a little over a million dollars on a single child by the time the child reaches 25 years old this is from the pregnancy test to the last collage tuition bill.
some spend more others less but that is a lot of money.

plus if you add all the court costs for paternity tests, marriage costs, and divorce
i don't see how i would be worth just the "finances"

both the baby and the man costs too much financially, physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally to get pregnant for any other reason than love.

I have kids that were made with love, with my husband for love and i would not have it any other way

for the finances....honestly that makes me laugh

Answer 7

Unless he's a very well-known figure, or has millions of dollars, I don't see why a woman would want to trap him for financial reasons. Trapping a man for emotional reasons, however, I can see happening more frequently. When I was 22 and in love with an ex who was a womanizer and had a different woman every month, I was naive enough to think that if he had a child with me he'd clean up his act. It was just a thought that hit me for a day or two, but of course I never acted on it. He was my second boyfriend and I was pretty desperate to keep him and didn't have much experience about relationships and what keeps a man around. I confused obligation with willingness.

I know of men who have tried to "lock" a woman down by wanting to get her pregnant too. I think a lot of men have wanted a woman or two so bad, they thought of the idea. I experienced something similar in two of personal relationships too, where he thought if I have his kid, I'd marry him and he doesn't have to worry about me looking for other options or leaving.

Answer 8

My Mother did it. She was 'paid' to have Me, then married for money. That is why I was born. Point taken, or would You like all the details and case notes that I have at My disposal? If it is beyond the realms of Your comprehension that is only because You are not being made aware of these acts (crimes) being perpetrated against Men. Ever wondered why so many celebrities are named in paternity actions? Money could never be the reason, could it? When was the last time You read an article in a 'Woman's Magazine' addressing this issue? How many feminist activists are remonstrating and demanding justice for the injured parties (Men)?
Now would be a good time to post a question asking for Men to supply the details of Their experiences. You might learn some valuable lessons about the 'real' world.

Answer 9

I think excluding cases in which the guy is rich or on the verge of becoming rich women only women who are complete idiots would try to trap them for money. Some women honestly believe that if you have a baby the guy will stick around, I think that's the more common train of thought.

Answer 10

And more importantly why would they risk getting fat, stretch marks, droopy boobs and being tied up for AT LEAST the next 5 years and pushing something out their genitals just to get money when yes, like you said, the money isn't just spent on them, so it won't exactly go far. It's not as if a woman just pops a baby out, puts it in the corner in a cot then goes out shopping to buy high heels for herself with the money for the baby's nappies and clothes. (which obviously they grow out of quickly)

Answer 11

Im glad i never have to worry about these issues cause i wont have sex till marriage, and i dont believe in divorce, and the woman i will marry must also believe this way. Imagine bringing a kid into this world with 2 parents split up or even a premarital pregnancy? If you want the best for your kids sometimes u give up a few things beforehand to give them that happiness. People these days only care about themselves(not all, just most).