My current B/F of two years is being harrassed by his ex wife to keep me away from the kids. Him and i have had altracations in the past & now we have been working on getting back together. His ex id now threatning that if him and i get back together that she will file to keep me away from them. Can she do this? Him and I HAVE had arguments but NEVER when the kids are around.
2007-10-03 02:42:29 · 16 answers · asked by Curious 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yep, it's possible. I've seen it happen. If she can convince a judge that being around you is bad for the child's emotional or mental well-being, they might order you to stay away. It probably won't be permanant, but it can happen.
2007-10-03 02:54:11 · answer #1 · answered by greeneyes_bjb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why, oh why? would you want to confuse these children? You'd be an adult figure in they're regular lives -- yet perhaps gone in say, 6 months? (or however long, a whole year?) as before -- U don't think those kids felt that conflict then? They've already went through a household split. Now they get to see Daddy w/ some lady he's intimate with. Then on bad terms w/ ... then back w/ again ... Be real!!!
I'd love to know my ex is seeing someone -- so he won't get nosy when I do. Yet, imaging my son sitting in Daddy's house with 'some lady' -- irksome! and awkward. Why should she even be in my child's life too?
Do you know how much time a Mother worries over her kids relationships w/ teachers, neighbors, other kids? And you just waltz into a child's life ... right into their living space and boom@! Don't think that's much impact? Just picture a new neighbor co-worker for yourself -- now picture them walking into your bedroom when you're reading; or knocking on your bathroom door -- or asking you questions you wouldn't expect, cause; who it this person again? and who invited them?
Have some feelings for others lives, which you could disrupt; and not just your relationship w/ a single Dad. Make 'your time' just as his kids get & keep it seperate until it's understandable and solid to everyone.
2007-10-03 03:44:30 · answer #2 · answered by Ann 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she has PROOF that you are a bad influence or threat to the KIDS, then she CAN demand supervised visitation and make him pay for that, but that is about all she can do. If you were a convicted pedophile, rapist, murderer or something like that, she might be able to yank all of his privileges - - she obviously does not like you and does not want you around her kids - why not head her off before she starts spending a bunch of your money too, and just tell her you will gladly go somewhere else on the days the kids visit - - kill her with kindness and cooperation.... then she does not have REASON to get the courts involved -
2007-10-03 03:31:20 · answer #3 · answered by BikerChick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No she can't. When the kids are with him he can take them around whomever he chooses to as long as he is not putting them in danger. The only way she could keep you away from the children is if you were endangering them or if there is a specific clause in their divorce decree saying something to that effect. His decree might say something about "each parent agrees not to have overnight guests of the opposite sex in the presence of the minor children" then you would want to be careful about spending the night but there are ways to go around that as well- you are a roommate, not a guest, etc.
She has no case- I find it hilarious how some ex's waste so much time and energy making the other miserable, or at least trying to!
2007-10-03 02:54:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sour grapes!! People know what buttons to push in any circumstance. She is using the kids as a pawn trying to get through them to him and then to you. And it's working! Some together time between you and him is needed to get to the bottom of this and try to work it out. Her threats are showing her ignorance and she's being very petty. If he loves you and wants to be with you he will ignore what she's attempting to do. Scare tactics and threats can be dealt with legally. ( Remember Judge Judy? She would have her kicked to the curb in a heartbeat. ) His ex needs to grow up and consider the children's feelings. Talk to someone who knows what reality is, and when push comes to shove, you can shove back.
2007-10-03 03:01:13 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she can depending on your state, but to file a restraining order- she has to have just cause. If she has full custody status, full care giver status and visitation is not set in stone- she can. May have to set up supervised visitations for a while? but depending on age of children, may have to go to court- she can do whatever as long as she believes in best interest of children, courts will then decide if best interest of children. Unfortunately you have NO rights. (that is unless you get married).
My hubbys ex doesn't like me, but because we are married and share this home, she has no choice.
Yes, she was gonna try being an evil wench, but- the child is older and would be more detrimental to herself to keep child away from father. Child old enough to decide now who she wants to live with. So his ex has no choice but to keep the peace. Still withholds Fri, refuses to meet up with me for pickup, but my hubby and I have talked to her somewhat about situation. We did comply and provided her own bedroom here at great expense to ourselves.
2007-10-03 02:59:39 · answer #6 · answered by tbird 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you didn't do it in front of the kids and you haven't harmed or threatened the kids I don't see how she can. He must have gone back and told her about the altercation which was a bad Idea. Sounds like she it trying to keep him away from you. Are you sure he is finished with her?
2007-10-03 03:09:58 · answer #7 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she has a valid reason why she doesn't want you around them and can proof it then she might be able to do so....Also, if the kids are the ones who doesn't want to be around you then thats a bigger reason why she may consider not wanting you around....With me and my "ex-husband", our children have a very hard time wanting anything to do with his girlfriend and as it may be alittle unfair to her, my children do come first and have no part of her what so ever....It's a hard sutuation to be in but, that is what being divorce with children means...Hopefully, you can be civil with one another and come to some resloution but, remember the children will always be FIRST....
2007-10-03 03:24:55 · answer #8 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Altercations, have these been filed with any authorities? If so, there would be record that either of you may be unfit to be around the children. It could make for a case.
2007-10-03 02:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His ex can't control who he associates with, and unless she can prove you to be life threatening to her children or dangerous, then no... this is rediculous of her, also.
You aren't alone in this sort of behavior by an ex... she is bitter and expresses it by being bitter when it comes to the ex spouse's life... well, sorry!! they are divorced, and who your boyfriend associates with isn't her concern, or business.
I haven't heard of a judge granting an ex wife control over her ex husband's friends. And i worked for attorneys for many years.
I think that your best bet is to gather your dignity, act like a lady and IGNORE the boyfriend's ex. please don't let her control your mood and emotions.. i'm sure you have other things in your life to attend to. and take care
2007-10-03 03:19:47 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋