I am having a hard time with my boyfriend being gone. Does anyone have any suggestions about ways to cope? I know the first thing on everyone's mind is to go see a doctor but I have white coat syndrom. So any suggestions that I can do myself would be great. Thank you!
2007-10-02 18:54:13 · 9 answers · asked by Countrygirl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
OK! I'm qualified to answer this question. Time to get out of the house, and find a job. Get a hobby. Deployments suck. I won't lie to you. Ive been through more dets, deployments and work ups then I care to mention. But that's what I do. Ive got 3 kids and a home based business to keep me plenty busy. Workout, get in shape, go to college or vocational school, start a small home based business, go home and stay with your folks. IF you see any bad news about anything military related don't watch it. Go to the family support meetings if you can. That's my best advice.
2007-10-03 02:21:24 · answer #1 · answered by navywife_2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does his unit put on Video Teleconferences so families can see and talk with their Soldiers? If not, ask you FRG leader is the unit can start doing this.
Email, or write to him everyday. Send small gifts...just being n the look-out for a gift will help you. Start planning the Mid-tour leave plans, or the re-deployment party.
Go volunteer! Get involved with his unit's FRG (Family Readiness Group) They're real lifesavers, and everyone's going through the same thing you are! The FRG should be open to Girlfriend's/Significant others of unit members as well. If you moved back home when his unit deployed, consider moving closer to his duty station (unless your family is really helping you out by you being home). Exercise...go to gym everyday and make friends there. Speak with your clergyman, or a military chaplain. Plan the Wedding.
Check out www.militaryonesource.com
Just some ideas. My wife was in Iraq for 15 months not too long ago, so I know what your going through.
Take Care.
2007-10-02 19:55:51 · answer #2 · answered by Greenman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you need is a diversion, something to occupy your mind. Contact with other spouses in the same situation can sometimes help. Try doing something completely different that you have never tried before, like learning ballroom dancing, or becoming a volunteer assistant on an archaeological dig.
If you need something for the long lonely nights, get along to the local sex shop and try something you have never tried before, or take up astronomy and get to know the stars.
Hope this helps, good luck.
2007-10-02 19:22:58 · answer #3 · answered by doshiealan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends on in what way(s) you are missing him. in general, i know, but if its more a sexual thing, i would say a nice hot bath,a p. flick and a vibrator/dildo should hold u over. emotionally, physically, etc. i would say soend more time with his relatives, or even carry pictures around of him. this way u c his face alot and after awhile u wont feel as detached as u feel now. another great idea is whenever u do feel down about him, make a camcording of ur feelings, whether its sexy or just emotional. like a video diary. if none of this helps, u really need to seek help because they are diagnosing spouses of deployed soldiers nowadays with clincal depression because of the same feelings u have, but the women never talk to anybody or try to help themselves fell a lil better to get them by until he comes home. play it smart, so he can have a sane girlfriend when he comes home.
2007-10-02 19:10:20 · answer #4 · answered by Ebony da *Dimepiece* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep busy writing letters to him, also fix care packages, this will help you and him both. try to make friends with other spouses in your position they will understand your needs better than any one.our local troops came home this week, the news was full of wives and husbands talking about how they supported each other, they worked together all year, and they were very organized , the homecoming banners they made stretched for miles, my friend told me as she was coming in how wonderfull it was to read all the signs. people stood out in the heat for hours to cheer these people home. if your location does'nt have a support group, try forming one that should keep you busy, and helping at the same time. God Bless you my prayers are with you!!
2007-10-02 19:12:13 · answer #5 · answered by mother of 4! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing now I can think is about future. If you intend to have his baby when he comes back, don't! Not until after his quarantine period to weed off the immunity injections against any biological agents in Iraq (could be 6months to a year)otherwise you will have severe stress from a highly deformed baby that has to be put down.
If you have white coat syndrome, ask the doctor to wear a different colored coat.
2007-10-02 19:08:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
my brother's in iraq for the second time currently.
it is scary, but let yourself think about him.
keep pictures out, pray when you have spare time.
also, focus on the positive.
when a soldier dies, and it comes on tv, change the channel.
it'll only affect you negatively.
2007-10-02 18:58:11 · answer #7 · answered by cait <3 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to connect with some military wives so you'll have someone to commiserate with. You'll all feel better know ing you're not in it alone.
2007-10-02 18:59:09 · answer #8 · answered by Asked and Answered 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, boyfriends are not spouses. You have to be married to call him your spouse.
No wonder women are so screwed up these days... they don't deal with reality.
2007-10-02 19:04:47 · answer #9 · answered by Mama's on the half tip 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋