I found that some of my husband's condoms are missing. I know how many he had last time we went away for a weekend. He keeps taking a supply with him whenever the two of us go away for a night or so. I have asked him why in the past......he gets defensive and says it's for my benefit (so that I don't fall pregnant etc) but we hardly ever use a condom normally. Am I being paranoid? Or am I a fool?
2007-10-02 17:04:12 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
lol...something is up in Denmark! Condoms don't disappear and last time I checked they don't have legs....
Could there be anyone else who might be taking them?...A young adult in the house? He needs to be 100% honest with you otherwise it does create doubt and suspicion like you have. Sit him down and have a good heart to heart and hopefully he comes clean. If he gives you some lame brain excuse put it up on here and we might be able to help...lol..good luck.
2007-10-02 17:13:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless he is jacking off with them to avoid a mess or something stupid like that. Or maybe he is making condom animals at the carnival. Is that how he brings water back from the well?
Honey, you should stop asking about it and do some covert surveillance of his activities. You can't be cheating on someone and not leave a trail of evidence.
But you have to act like there is no suspicion or accusations of cheating. He should think that you love and trust him and don't pry too much into his affairs.
Then when he is away from you, you should have him followed by a friend he doesn't know in a car he wouldn't recognize.
Find out where he spends every minute away from you for about three day to a week. That is a bout how long it takes before he will go back for a little more strange on the side.
Even if the sex is going good at home, men will cheat with other women just to get a thrill or power trip or just cause there is some whole that is making it available.
Hell, I'd be cheating if some sweet young lady was offering it. But I dont' go looking for it. But its out there all over if you are even a little bit of a player. Girls want it worse than guys will ever know.
Bad thing is, once you find out that he is cheating on you, what are you going to do about it?
I would recommend making a plan, so that you come out on top, winning. Keep the apartment, the money in the bank and the car or whatever. don't make a scene when you catch him with halfass evidence that he can explain away too easily.
But do make an exit strategy for leaving the cheat and I am 90% sure he is one. But I can be wrong.
But if he keeps condoms and doesn't use them with you, he's wanting them for a reason and it ain't you. One good thing to say is he is probably trying to protect you from disease in a small way. But he doesn't care enough to be faithful to you.
Even if you can't get evidence against him, his behaviour is suspicious enough to lock in a death sentence for the relationship.
Break your own heart before he does. Make a plan and get your girlfriends to help if they can be trusted. That is usually where men go it to the closest available woman. Sometimes that is the best friend, co-worker, or sister, etc...
BE aware. Wake up and smell the coffee.
2007-10-02 17:27:08 · answer #2 · answered by halfwittcg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, obviously if more condoms are missing than are being used between the two of you, it raises some questions. Not to mention a red flag or two!! It's interesting to me that you don't always use a condom if you don't want to get pregnant. What is the reason to only use it sometimes???
I would suggest keeping close inventory for awhile and make sure you are correct with the numbers. Also, I would use a condom EVERY time just in case. (don't want any STD's coming home, just in case) Plus, you really don't want to end up pregnant on the chance that he really is cheating.
Then, if you are sure the numbers don't add up...it's time to just lay it on the line and say..."I know there were more condoms here, what's going on??"
I'm not sure you're being a fool, but it certainly does sound suspicious. If he is cheating on you...
then he is the fool, not you!
2007-10-02 17:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by ladybug 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do agree to not accuse him of anything...... yet. Get some hard evidence first.
Secondly, if you have a gut feeling something isn't right, then follow it through until you are satisfied that nothing is going on.
I know if my husband had condoms missing and I asked him where they were, he would give me a straight answer. If he has nothing to hide, there shouldn't be a problem.
Someone said do an inventory on the condoms???? Hmm, can't he just go and buy some more at the shops & keep a secret stash somewhere???
Get a friend to follow him.
2007-10-02 17:17:09 · answer #4 · answered by Kylie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't blame you for being paranoid, but if he gets angry when you ask him that, put yourself in his shoes. If he asked you the same question and you were taking condoms with you, and you know you are innocent and don't mean anything dishonest to your relationship, would you answer him back by being angry??
Anger can mean that he is trying to cover up something by not caring about your feelings as a result of his fury, possibly because he knows he is in guilt.
....Besides, if you hardly ever use condoms, why the hell would he say it's for your benefit?
If you suspect anything suspicious, chances are your instincts may be correct.
2007-10-02 17:13:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not being paranoid you have a right to be believe me when you think there not there probley are.if you guys don't really use them which is normal for most married suggest useing some other kind of birth control. and see his reaction. tell him that your sorry you have to ask but you have right to be a little worried since it happens so much know a days dont make him feel as if your not really judging him you just want to know try to really listen to him and see what he says usually they confess to everything then after you heard it all. it all up to you what you do with the info. just try to be calm and really listen at first so you can get the info you want.
2007-10-02 17:15:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well you would know exactly how many condoms he has used on you! but he may just take heaps hoping to get real lucky with you, & also men would not bother to count them out & say one for tonight one for tomorrow night one for later lol they would just grab a handful i would imagine!
plus the ones that are missing may just have got left in the bathroom etc at the last place you were at so
dont be quick to destroy your marriage for nothing & trust him til you have real proof!!
2007-10-02 17:18:03 · answer #7 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u never use a condom and there are some missing it would be a cause for concern if this were my husband.
2007-10-02 23:38:05 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are not being paranoid......let me guess...he is using the condoms as he masturbates right?
2007-10-02 17:13:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hell no you are not being paranoid. Just remember if you go digging you WILL find something. Are you ready for that?
2007-10-02 17:09:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋