My best friend keeps telling me that we shouldn't be friends because she is a bad best friend and thinks that she is just going to hurt me. She used to tell me this all the time when we first started being best friends and we'd stop being friends for a day or so and she'd run back to me saying how much she misses me. She hasn't done it for i wanna say 5 months now but last night she did it again. And she called me up and begged for our friendship back, i couldn't say no because she is my best friend. Is she really looking out for me or does she not wanna be friends and shes just saying this to get me pissed off so i'll end the friendship? What does this mean when she does this? Is she insecure about herself and i keep trying to convince her she's an amazing best friend and she won't hurt me but i don't know what to do. HELP
2007-10-02 04:20:20 · 15 answers · asked by iloveyou6 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It's probably true that she is a bad friend but at least she has some good qualities. She's able to admit to the problem that she's is a bad friend but unable to break up with you because of the lack of her own will power. Instead of breaking up the realtionship herself, she's trying to force you to be the one that ends it by making you mad so that you won't have any other options then just to cut off all ties with her. In spite of all this, I suggest you two keep on being friends. The two of you seem to be really close to each other and can't bare to be apart. The quesiton you should be asking is what makes her a bad friend?? For example, if she's bad with money then don't lend her any. If you do, don't be surprise when she doesn't pay you back because you've been warned. Everybody has good and bad qualities. And if you can live with some of the bad, then the relationship shouldn't really end.
2007-10-02 04:39:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's rare in a friendship that you don't get hurt sometimes. The ones we hurt the most are the ones we love the best. It's just the way it goes. She does seem to have some issues with confidence and security. Unfortunately, there will come a time when this game she is playing will frustrate you to the point that you won't be so willing to accept her back. It sounds to me like she is either doing something that she knows would hurt you or she is having serious self-esteem issues. The best you can do is be there for her until you either can't stand it anymore or she gets help for her insecurities. Good Luck!
2007-10-02 04:27:06 · answer #2 · answered by JVar 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh goodness.
Okay to start, i really doubt that she is just trying to piss you off so you will end both of your friendship. That just doesnt seem right, expessially for a best friend.
Well anyways, people are too complex for you to know for sure what she is thinking. I mean seriously! I dont even know what you are thinking.
There could be alot fo reasons...
One could be that she likes someone you like, and doenst want to hurt you.
and if that is the case, if she isnt your friend that would hurt you even more knowing that she would choose him over you.
since if you are not her friend then she doenst have to worry about your feelings.
Been there. seen it.
Another thing is that she might have gotten her self in some kinda trouble. like involved with people she shouldnt be.
Its hard to say.
You should try to talk to her, and find out what is going on with her in he rlife. Tell her she can tell you anything, becuase youare her best friend and would do anything to be there for her, she just has to let you in.
You love her, thats for sure.
Goodluck. :)
2007-10-02 04:28:17 · answer #3 · answered by Bobby 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like she is bi-polar. And she is putting you in the position of counselor for her back-and-forth swings.
If you really are her best friend, why not help her go to a free clinic and help her find out for sure she really is bi-polar? If she is, then it could turn out to be the kindest 'best-friend' thing you could do. Go with her, hold her hand when she gets the real diagnosis, hold her hand when she tells her parents, hold her hand and make sure she takes her medication if that is the truth.
It's wonderful of you to want to love this person despite her odd behavior, but you are not ultimately responsible for the friendship. But I suggest you tell her to see a doctor about the possibility of being bi-polar, and helping her get through that as best you can.
Good luck. It's just a thought and an idea, it may not be the truth but it's a place to start.
2007-10-02 04:29:58 · answer #4 · answered by enn 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What makes her a bad best friend?. I am assuming she does drugs, if she does and you dont take her back as a friend and HELP her get through what ever she is going through then that shows a lack of character on your part.
I think you need to sit her down and talk to her and make her tell you what makes her think she does not deserve your friendship. Obviously it is a cry for help, from what you just told me.
Good luck anyway!
2007-10-02 04:27:12 · answer #5 · answered by bh4rath 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What you're coping with is the terror of achievable detachment and that's making you insecure and inflicting you to concentration on the unfavourable. your people ought to be information of you, purely has you need to be information. ask your self, why might you act the way you probably did and in case you had to do it back, might you. there is not any such ingredient as "getting somebody decrease back". while somebody is out of your life, there is not any question. I advise giving a while and respiratory room. in case you sense such as you have completed what your first strategies tells you to do, you are going to ought to enable the placement pass. have faith your self and your reactions, no count how unusual they may well be.
2016-11-07 01:19:29 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just need to really talk to her. be very sincere when you do it though, if you start joking she wont take you seriously.
sit her down one day and say "i just want to tell you how much of an amazing friend you are.." and then go on from there. tell her the things you love about her.
make sure you dont offend her :)
good luck :)
xxx <3
2007-10-02 04:24:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you've got a boyfriend i think she is defo doing the dirty on you!!
Cannot believe this friend! sounds like a right barrell of laughs for you?
Why do you want her as a friend?
Got to be honest and don't mean to sound like im taking the pi$$ but why would you want a nutter like that in your life?
Its a tough enough place without loons involved!!
Good luck with that though!!
2007-10-02 04:26:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like she has some self-esteem issues or she is "fishing" for compliments. Just be there for her & listen to her when she needs it. Thats what best friends do.
2007-10-02 04:26:43 · answer #9 · answered by Bright 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your friend has a lot of baggage from something that happened to her before. Have you tried talking to her about it? Like, not reassuring her, but asking her -why- she's such a spaz about that all the time? What did she do? She's got a guilty conscience over something.
2007-10-02 04:24:00 · answer #10 · answered by gilgamesh 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋