Well i broke up with him!!! I'm feeling great. I still miss what we had at one time but i know some where out there their will be someone who will never yell at me or call me names. I've been still talking to my ex and he is being so nice! He is still calling me "BABY" "sweetheart" "Darling" i told him i don't think he should call me that anymore and he said i will always be his "BABY" i like hearing him say it but it makes me weak to him when he does. I was talking to him last night and he said "i don't want any other girl then you. i still want to sleep together if your down" I didn't know what to say i've never had a one night stand or be friends with benefits! So please help me do you think i'm asking for trouble and even worse more heartache?
2007-10-02 03:44:03 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He says he wants to have sex with the only girl who makes him happy. he also would never hurt me again.
2007-10-02 04:07:36 · update #1
Like most abusers, he is a master manipulator. Do not get involved with him again. All he'll do is continue to drag you down and destroy you.
Sure he's all sweetness and honeyed words now but you know what he's really like; when he's in a relationship. Keep his real behavior in the front of your mind and stop talking to him.
2007-10-02 03:47:52 · answer #1 · answered by Saphira 3 · 4⤊ 2⤋
Don't be confused. Trust yourself and take care of you. Like you said "I don't want to be hurt anymore", so don't put yourself in a place where you can right now. It is too soon. Allow yourself some space and continue to feel the "good feelings" you have for yourself. Your boyfriend is a loser. He treated you poorly, he ABUSED you. Stop being his whipping post. He is being nice but that won't last long. An abusive man can only change if he gets help....so, has he or is he getting help?? Be strong, you made a tough move in the first place, keep moving forward.
2007-10-02 06:31:06 · answer #2 · answered by jewels 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it Its definitely a road to more heart break. He calls you sweet names because he knows what you like to hear I bet your tone of voice even changes when he talks to you like that, but if he doesnt care enough about you to respect you why would even want to be near him? He is preting on your vulnerable side.You said yorself that he mistreats you and you broke up for a "REASON" you deserve better. If you are sleeping with him and being his whore of convenience how will you meet your Mr. Right. Do not take my comment as an insult I just want you to see what he is trying to do to you. I say this from experience I have been there before and I felt so used and it took a while for me to pull myself together and cut him completely out of my life after so much damage to my heart was done. We women are emotional we are nurturers and thats a gift so you cant honestly be a friend with benefits and not care.
2007-10-02 03:54:22 · answer #3 · answered by ms_sweet_real 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I definitely think you are headed for a serious heartbreak if you play the "friends with benefits" role. What are you going to do if you keep sleeping with him, and then one day he meets someone new and simply decides to end it with you? It is very hard to seperate emotions from sex for women. If you do continue to see him, I would make sure you date others also. Remember, some men will still hold on to you even when they really don't want you because the thought of you being with someone else bothers them. I wish you the best. Stay strong!
2007-10-02 03:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by THE RESCUE LLAMA!!! 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Don't do it. He wants to take advantage of your feelings for him and turn it into pleasure for him. You'll just feel miserable when all he wants is sex from you while your heart wants him to love you. Just let him go. In the long run you will be much happier. There are other guys out there who would love to have you. Let this guy go. He seems like scum especially asking if you two could still sleep together...thats just low and selfish of him. No one deserves to be treated liket that.
2007-10-02 03:52:00 · answer #5 · answered by Jacob's Mommy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
****RED FLAG AGAIN SAMMIE****
DO NOT give into him!!! He is just trying to stay all nice and sweet to you to get a piece of Action.
He may realize he lost a good thing, but him being nicey nice now, after you left is too late.
You must stay strong and avoid temptation, because if you go and sleep with him at his beck and call, that makes you no better than a prostitute (with no pay though) . He is just using you for sex then.
He is just using you.. until maybe he can find another woman to verbally abuse!!
Find yourself a new man who wont do that..
2007-10-02 07:19:31 · answer #6 · answered by linda_c_44 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as always the problem is WILLPOWER. meditate on that and I am sure in your own time you will know the answer. i suppose when a relationship breaks it goes two ways... either get together again and get marrried or separate for ever. random sex with him is inferior to what you had. you can have this with anyone. what i would do? i would say i'm still in love and want a real relationship with out abuse or we have to take a long break to figure things out.
2007-10-02 04:14:07 · answer #7 · answered by sarah kay 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's your ex for a reason. Now he wants to be friends with benefits. He's trying to control you. Respect yourself. Don't allow him to do that. He verbally abused you. You're not together anymore, and you said you're feeling great, that should be reason enough to just not even deal with him at any kind of level anymore. His words are those typical of an abuser, manipulator, player. Going forward with HIS suggestion, will only hurt you more. He's playing you girl.
2007-10-02 03:56:08 · answer #8 · answered by AlS 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why are you still in contact with him? If you don't have children together then stop talking to him. He is a user and knows how to get to your heart ( The love names ). You should never ever sleep with him, he has no intentions of changing he just wants what he wants with no commitment on his end. You will be hurt beyond your wildest dreams...
2007-10-02 03:51:41 · answer #9 · answered by kitkat 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you can work things with him if you have feeling, care about him or love him. Maybe he didn't mean to yell at you but its you to open thing up and tell him your side of your story why you are hurt. The best thing is to meet him and lay all your option on the table. Don't hesitate to ask any question that bothers you and let him answer it honestry. Better communication is the key here to understand one another and solve your differences. Take care of yourself and each other.
2007-10-02 04:08:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The man is being nice, because he wants to continue sleeping with you until he finds another fool. He's even told you that he wants to continue sleeping with you. Don't you get it? Stop talking to this guy. He won't even respect you enough to call you by your name. Under no circumstances should you sleep with this guy. The next time he calls, tell him you're busy and hang up.
2007-10-02 03:59:50 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋