ok! it has been 3 weeks!!!!since my mother in law the b-tch!!...?

Question

ok! it has been 3 weeks!!!!since my mother in law the b-tch!!...spoke to my hubby declaring she wants nothing to do with me, i am counting the days eager to see her or awnser the phone.... what are ways i can tell her to **** off !! i mean ive benn with my hubby 11 years and she still does not accept me! only creates problems. she wants my husband to leave me! but my hubby loves me and wont have it! but she tires me!!!! she had one of her son's divorce allready! i just want to say it right! "she is mad" becuase she believes i took her son from her!!! "lunatic"

she is single has had more than 6 relationships and wont settle down! 48

Answer 1

If your mother in law was older I would say we could have been related. Mine did the same with my brother in law. My ex sister in law could not take it any more and they are now divorced. Since then she has broken up his last 2 relationships. I can relate to you and best advise is that I will tell you what works for me.

My mother in law is not part of my world. I do not see nor speak to her. If she wants to call her son then great. If he picks up his cell for her or calls her back then, good for her.
I do not do drama. What my mother in law thinks, feels, comments, or wants is not important to me. I don't care. Since your husbands pays no attention to her request to divorce you and your married for 11 years. Why are you allowing her to take away your peace? Best way to tell her to
get lost is have a happy marriage and life with out her in it. Let your husband deal with her. I can honestly say that hearing his mother constantly bitc* about you gets old after a while and he will start to cut her off and hang up. I don't think you need to spend your time with your husband talking about his mother. In a way you might have to feel a little bad for him look at what he was raised around.

You are correct, she has no life and is alone therefore this is how she acts. You can't reason with Crazy.

Answer 2

Well if this is how you act and talk around her I can see why she wouldn't be to accepting. You have an awful mouth on you.

A loving mother is happy when her son finds someone to love him. BUT......she still is his mother and always will be. Most moms still want to be part of their son's life including her daughter-in-law. To many daughter-in-laws think of their husband as "their property". They are still, sons, brothers, uncles, cousins, ect. long before the wife came into the situation. I keep hearing over and over how the mom is upset because the wife "takes the son away from her". Do any of you stop and think that just maybe you do. You need to keep your husband's family included in yours lives, as I'm sure you do your own.

If you can't stand her that much I would think you would be very happy she has had no contact for 3 weeks.

Answer 3

You should always try to make a concerted effort to get along with your in-laws/outlaws. The main reason to get along with your MIL is because she is your hubby's mother. He came from her womb and he will always be closer to her than you, though he will never admit it. And you would be stupid to try to interfere. The best that you can hope for is something along the lines of a distant friendship. Do not give her any reasons to bad-mouth you. Stop the cussin' (though I completely understand it), and stop those demands that you are putting on your hubby NOW. Go & apologize to him this minute! This has been tearing him apart for all these years and he's been keeping it to himself. Encourage him to confide in you and take his side all the time for a while. The poor guy needs a break! If you are reading between the lines here, you will see that your hubby will soon feel relaxed enough to confide in you and tell you things. NEVER SAY A BAD WORD AGAINST HIS MOTHER AGAIN! Be his lover, friend, buddy, confidante, a grown-up version of a womanly wife who is also hot! Take better care of yourself & don't get so stressed. Take comfort in the fact that your MIL at least doesn't live with you. Win your hubby over to your side and I think you are grown-up enough to keep him there. Weren't you taught to always respect your elders? ;-) ;-)

Answer 4

Her power thrives on annoying you Simply kill her with kindness Do not give her the satifaction of getting upset This is what she lives for Take her power away and then turn on the answering machine If she is really annoying turn down the volume When she rants or raves simply tell her I am sorry I can not and will not speak to you when you are acting this way if you are on the phone simply say call back when you are ready to speak to me in a respectful way If she is in your home tell her you will have to leave until you can act and speak responsibly in my home Then simply show her the door If you know your husband loves you and cares for and will stick by you this will be no problem His Mother needs to cut the apron strings get some counseling for her controll issues and let her children lead there lives If she does not she will become a lonely miserable old woman be consistant with this She sound like she has major issues and needs major counseling

Answer 5

It is surprising that you could not win over the heart of your mother-in-law in the long period of 11 years. Now,you want to show off your head. What will be the result ? She will retaliate with more force and bitterness in relation will go deeper. Where shall it end ?And who will be benefitting with all the quarrels and animosity ?No one. the three of you should sit together in an amiable atmosphere and talk out all the issues and come to a peaceful conclusion,so that all of you lead a happy life. This is going to be difficult but you have to search a way to do it.

Answer 6

wel im in your position. i thnk you should jt have it out with her, that's the only wy i got my mil of my back. i mean she stil thinks the worst of me, apparently we didn't consumate the marriage cause we didn't have a honey moon, an now our marriage will be dne in the next year. even though we have a daughter. stupdi stupid woman!!!
seriously have your say in a calm way,and let her know, nothing is going to stand in your marriage. not her or any other person.
let her know that if she keeps on going on the way she is, there wil be no more visits from her son or his family,
tell your hubby, if he wont stand up o her, you will, and if you do, things are going to get nasty!!!!

Answer 7

As long as your husband stands his ground this woman will never succeed at breaking your marriage up... its sad to a point because instead of trying to win her son back she is losing him and losing special moments that she could be sharing with you as her daughter in law and her son, your husband should just tell her look until you stop this I am not coming around or calling.....

Answer 8

i have the same problem, the solution was to talk to my husband about the situation and how i'm feeling. i had one major fight with my mother in law and that was it, i avoided her as much as i can. i try my best not to pick a fight with her because i know it would hurt my husband, since no matter what happens, she is still, after all, his mom. however, my husband and i have a very clear understanding that we would not let her get in the way of our relationship and that we would always resolve our problems ourselves, without any interference. i also told my husband that i love him and that if he would let his mom get in our way, then that is his call, but i would expect better from him, since we are both adults already. i also told him that i expect him to talk to me first and confirm something first before he starts believing any of the stuffs that his mom is telling him. that's what i did and so far it worked. i hope it works for you too :-)

Answer 9

If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you then don't have anything to do with her, stay away, don't rant and rave and swear as she will use that as ammo against you, it's HER loss if she doesn't want to get to know you, but if you prove you are a decent person in your actions then she hasn't got a leg to stand on. If you swear at her your husband will see that perhaps she has a point, being rude could work against you.

Answer 10

I know this is hard but try to talk to her and find out why she does not like you. You didn't take her son away from her. Blood is alway thicker than water. Tell her she is insecure and needs to grow up. Besides your husbands happiness should be the most important to her.