My first instinct is to respond rather nonchalantly, as if they has just told me that they're left-handed, and that their sexual orientation doesn't matter to me at all (which it doesn't). But I also wonder if by doing that, I'm completely dismissing any importance of what they're trying to tell me, and ignoring the courage that I can only imagine it might require to come out.
How would YOU prefer someone to respond?
2007-10-01 07:37:58 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I agree, it shouldn't be any different than announcing that he/she is a heterosexual. But I don't make the rules that much of society seems to follow.
2007-10-01 07:51:47 · update #1
Nonchalant is fine, supportive is better, pretty much anything except hostile. It doesn't require much to be said, just something like "Oh, that's cool". Most people don't want to make a big deal about it.
2007-10-01 07:42:53 · answer #1 · answered by Iggy 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The way you handled it is how it should be as these days it is less important than it used to be. The understanding and the fact you listened to them was good enough and the fact that you did not judge them helped them a lot. What could you say or do to make what they had told you any better.
If you seem happy with it and accept it as normal common practise then the person whom had to wrestle with the coming out etc had a easier time confessing their life with you
2007-10-01 08:06:21 · answer #2 · answered by kevinmccleanblack 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friend just told me the same thing. At this point in society I think its natural that you may have questions, opinions, etc. since its not totally accepted yet. If you feel comfortable with it, ask questions, its not something theyre ashamed of obviously and knowing that youre interested and not just ignoring it, will make them feel all the more comfortable and accepted. For example, I asked my friend if I could still point out hot men to her and she just laughed.
If i were a lesbian I would want someone to show their 100% true reaction...if soemone were to just pretend id said something as normal as 'im left-handed' i think i would get the vibe they werent really comfortable and, in turn, i would feel less comfortable with my sexual orientation around them. Homosexuals know it is somethingn that is somewhat taboo still so they will not be offended if you ask questions.
2007-10-01 07:45:47 · answer #3 · answered by shgonzo 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My first thought would be, why would someone, a complete stranger, walk up to me and announce that he was a homosexual?
If it wasn't a stranger, then I probably would know the person well enough to know already why they felt the need to tell me this or I would feel close enough to them to ask why.
Speaking personally, I can't imagine ever making such an announcement to someone who would worry about how to respond in a pc manner.
2007-10-01 07:45:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My general reaction falls somewhere between "who cares" and "so what". Perhaps is it a bit dismissive. However, I really do not care to hear if someone is homosexual any more than I care to hear the details of how my heterosexual friends frolic.
2007-10-01 07:43:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To take the mick but not in a nasty way. Dont react like someone just slapped you. Be very sensative about the whole thing and basically think before you say anything.
2007-10-01 07:42:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be genuine. If you pretty much figured they were, say "I kind of thought you might be". If you had no idea, say" wow, I had no idea. So is it exciting to be coming out?" Those options make them feel like you are supportive of them, and not pretending something that isn't the case.
2007-10-01 07:42:29 · answer #7 · answered by John M 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your attitude is great and your instincts are good. Don't make a big deal out of it, but do let them know that you're glad they respected you enough to trust you with that knowledge.
I like you and I don't even know you!
2007-10-01 07:46:59 · answer #8 · answered by Clint 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that your "instinct" is perfectly correct... maybe you could add.. " I understand how hard it is for some people to "come out" and I appreciate that you trust me enough to say that to me... I'm glad you said something..."
2007-10-01 07:42:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I would say, "Thank you for feeling comfortable enough to share that with me" then give them a big hug!
2007-10-01 07:57:25 · answer #10 · answered by Turtle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋