he tells me that he loves me but he has been talking and being with her for about a month. He tells me he's not in love with her but he cares for her. She works with him. I love him and we have two kids together. He tells me that it will never happen again. Her husband, her, me and him all had a little chat on speaker phone togther and she denied it all. but he has proof to everything. but she stills denies it. they tell each other they love each other. but he says he is just saying it. he doesnt mean it. he also says he wants to work it out. Let me know your opinions please....
2007-09-30 13:27:11 · 14 answers · asked by susan c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tell him he's playing with fire. Everyone has desires, but the promises we make in relationship, in marriage, are important and he can make the choice to honor his vow to his wife. The person your husband should be focusing on is you. If he feels an attraction of any kind to this woman, both you and he together need to work on creating distance from her. Save your marriage. Do it for yourselves and for your children. We are all tempted by what "could have been" or "is the grass greener over there" or "did I make the right choice". But the real nuts and bolts of life is that it is not a fantasy love fling with another woman. It's falling in love with your own spouse, every single day, for the rest of your life. Maybe you should both see a therapist to help him figure out these feelings. Try a marriage encounter too...
2007-09-30 13:38:04 · answer #1 · answered by JustamomnamedLillianNewman 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's denying everything? After your husband has confessed to you and her husband knows everything, too??
I'd tell your husband to stop having any communication with her of ANY kind or you and the kids will be GONE.
I wouldn't care whether she denied anything or not, and I wouldn't waste my time talking to her husband, either. I'd hunt up a marriage counselor and take your husband for a few sessions.
Good luck to you both.
2007-09-30 13:41:29 · answer #2 · answered by bitadkins 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never too late to work on relationships especially when children are involved. He doesn't need to quit his job he has a family to support. Trust is the number 1 thing in this relationship and the trust has been broken. You are aware of where he stands with this woman and he wants to be with her.Always remember if it wasn't this women it would have been someone else. He has no excuses.
2007-09-30 13:47:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is not that he's talking and connecting with another woman. The problem is WHY.
You should try to look into it deeper and find out WHY it happened. What did he find with her that he is lacking with you. If it is something that you are willing and able to provide, then try to do it. If not ...
The same goes for you of course. Do you have everything you need from this marriage? Rather than walk out on it, try to figure out what each of you needs.
2007-09-30 13:40:45 · answer #4 · answered by whuz007 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, you know that he was cheating on you, so who cares if she is denying it to her hubby. even if he and this woman are telling each other that they love each other, it's beside the point. the point is that he cheated on you, everything else is just details about his cheating. you are going to have to decide what you are going to do. you can either leave him or stay and try to work it out. i found out over the summer that my hubby was cheating on me. we have two small children, so i decided to stay. i believe that all people are human and make mistakes, so i gave him another chance. it's very hard to try to get past. we are in counseling and he is doing everything he can to show me that me made a mistake and that he wants to be with me and our family. sit down and talk to your hubby about what you want to do.
2007-09-30 13:41:46 · answer #5 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds real shady . she was obviously lieng because her husband was listening . come on why would he tell her he loves her if he doesn't . if you want to make it work he needs to never contact her again, if that means new job for him or her then so be it .and you need to keep a real close eye on him .also talk to him why was he talking to her in the first place ? i also recommend counseling
2007-09-30 14:16:33 · answer #6 · answered by just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think from what you have told that you two need to seek marriage counseling and get advice from a trained therapist, not people on Yahoo Answers. Good Luck to you and your children.
2007-09-30 13:41:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he should leave his job if he is serious...However, ask him what made him do this in the first place? Who's to say that it won't happen again? What's the REAL problem? New job new woman....Just food for thought
2007-09-30 13:37:48 · answer #8 · answered by Lana 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he wants to work it out so badly make him leave his job so she is nowhere near him. If he comes up with every excuse in the world why he can't leave then he is up to no good.
2007-09-30 13:33:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't be like the Titanic. Look out for the iceberg.
2007-09-30 15:04:11 · answer #10 · answered by Dave S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋