My boyfriend and I had plans to purchase a home together. I got the loan because I had better credit and once in the future when he fixed his we would re-fi and add him on the loan. We also agreed he would be on the title because he would be paying half of the mortgage.
Right before closing I came to my senses and decided if he wasn't on the loan then he wouldn't be on the title. It's not that I don't trust him it's taking the safe route.
Well he was furious with me and told me I was a liar. I closed on my house 2 days ago and now he wants me to re-fi and add him on the loan so he can be on the title or else he is not moving in with me.
I'm so hurt he is doing this because I got a really low interest rate and I don't want to start over. What can I do? I told him we should gt married then and he agreed. But I don't want my marriage to be based solely on a house title issue. I feel like I'm against the wall and I don't know what to do.
Cindy
2007-09-30 13:25:04 · 9 answers · asked by Traviesa 2 in Business & Finance ➔ Renting & Real Estate
He wants me to make a desicion now. I love him but I'm so hurt he is chosing to do this to me. Now I either have to find a roommate or convince him to stop being stubborn
2007-09-30 13:53:43 · update #1
Oh my...
Since you have a good rate...don't refinance. You'll end up getting a higher rate and you may be subject to prepayment fees depending on the loan, plus closing costs on the refi.
You'd be better off to have a lawyer draft a note for 50% of your mortgage from your boyfriend with you as the beneficiary. You can add his name to the deed at the same time... Just tell him you've seen too many episodes of Judge Judy and anything can happen... Then you can get married when it's "the right time."
2007-09-30 13:37:03 · answer #1 · answered by Randy L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not have to refinance in order to add someone to the title. Most title/settlement companies can do it for a small fee. However, putting him on the title without being on the loan is a very risky thing. If you two did break up, then he could skip out on making any financial contribution and not have any liability to the mortgage company but he would still own the house. And you couldn't just take him off the title because he moved out.
Consult a real estate attorney about possibly drafting up some type of "rent to own" agreement for you whereby your boyfriend can "rent" from you until he improves his credit score at which point you can refinance (and re-title) in both your names. Or until you get married (but for the right reasons). And to help him feel he's not getting the short end of the stick, perhaps you can work a clause into the contract that if you two don't stay together and he decides to "terminate the lease", then he will get back a portion of the "rent" money. Of course he can't expect to get it all back because after all if he were to rent somewhere else he would only get back his security deposit, not refunded rent.
But getting married now just to resolve this issue is definitely not advisable. And if you are feeling "against the wall" it might not be such a bad thing for the two of you to take some time apart.
2007-10-01 08:26:04 · answer #2 · answered by somerdai 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this man is bullying you already, what do you think is going to happen in the future? It is unreasonable to think that you would 'give' him part ownership of your home. There is a reason he couldn't participate - bad credit often is a result of poor or irresponsible spending habits, and if this is his case, you could wind up messing up your credit too.
If he truly wanted to marry you, he would have asked that from the beginning - not as a threat. There's nothing you have said that suggests he is in love with you - or even has your best interests at heart.
Keep your house, sounds like you got a great deal, and go on with your life. This has the earmarks of an abusive relationship. His temper tantrums and threats also show that he is very insecure and immature. Is this what you want for your future?
It's your decision - please don't rush into it hastily. Getting out can be extremely difficult and costly. Good Luck to you.
2007-09-30 13:40:07 · answer #3 · answered by Alice S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi Cindy,
I think you should make a contract on the side with witness or even an lawyer. You have to have an agreement that is clear and fair for both of you and it has to be written somewhere.
When you decide to get married do it only because of love because otherwise you will regret it one day.
I wish you to find a solution that will make both of you happy.
Sincerely,
Patrick
2007-09-30 13:58:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is what happens when you do things backwards ,
Like buy a house with a BF .
Houses are commitments for families ,
And now you need out but ,
You already closed !
Too late to put him on at this point ,
Might jeopardize your rate !
See how things are going in 6 months ,
Maybe he'll get his $$$$ act together and would be able to qualify .
Not your fault his FICO is bad , is it ?
>
2007-09-30 13:31:27 · answer #5 · answered by kate 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you should have taken more time to decide all this before closing out. I wouldn't want to answer and cause you to mess up you're life so I'll just say ..... Good Luck with whatever you decide.
2007-09-30 13:30:16 · answer #6 · answered by Tim E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What should you do? Nothing...yes Nothing. It comes down to a trust is mostly for you because you are RISKING everything with a guy who clearly isn't too sharp.
Do NOT let him make you feel guilty.. Instead tell him to fix his own credit
2007-09-30 13:36:17 · answer #7 · answered by JOHN 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take time off from him to think things through
2007-09-30 13:36:50 · answer #8 · answered by luvlabs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out while you can
2007-09-30 13:33:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋