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I was married for 10 years to my ex husband and we have a daughter. I divorced him b/c he began cheating on me with his b/f's wife and would not leave her alone. Its been 10 years and he's still with her. I have since remarried and love my husband very much. I've dreamt about them at least 4 nights a week since we divorced and the dreams get more weird as the years go by. To make things worse, they are currently building a house in the town where I live - 10 mins away. They did live about 45 mins away.

Can someone please help me figure out why I keep dreaming about them. I don't think about them while I'm awake. I just want the dreams to stop.

2007-09-30 12:25:32 · 10 answers · asked by Cathy D 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

10 answers

Dreams is how your mind tells you that you have something bothering you, sub-consciously. It sounds like, there has been no closure to your previous relationship, and it also sounds like your not consciously trying to.

You had a 10 year relationship and a daughter with your ex. There is a history that sounds like, you are trying to deny. I'm not saying you are still in love with him or you should be with him, but that on a deeper level, you are seeking for a better relationship to your ex than you have now.

The fact that you count how long it takes to see each other shows how much you actively try not to come in contact with him. But the truth is, you need to. For your daughter and for yourself really.

If you can fix that, I think your dreams will go away.

2007-09-30 12:36:58 · answer #1 · answered by tim 2 · 0 0

just because your divorced doesn't mean theres not still a place in your heart for him, it could be that your not comfortable with them moving so close. some say when we dream of an ex spouse that our self worth is really high. he's in your subconscious and inside u really don't want to see him or her again, while he was so far away it was okay but now its beginning to bother u. as it would bother most of us who have been hurt and betrayed. usually we dream of someone when theres unfinished business . just say some prayers, and just be glad u have a wonderful husband now and he can't hurt u anymore.

2007-09-30 19:37:59 · answer #2 · answered by jude 7 · 0 0

the dream is a reflection of what is going on in your life now. they are the symbols because it is familiar. take a look at your life and what it may be missing that this symbol is showing. you will dream with symbols that was part of your life for longer that the life you have now... you will find as you relationship with your current husband has lasted longer than the previous one, you will dream about life with him.... confusing I know but my dreams are just about changing now...

going over to them and making friends like adults might help move your subconscious in another direction.

2007-09-30 19:40:04 · answer #3 · answered by just me 5 · 0 0

What is the dream? Rarely when we dream about other people are we actually dreaming about them, as much as we are dreaming about some aspect of our own personna and how it relates to these people symbolicly.

Try getting a dream dictionary or dream encyclopedia to decipher what the symbols in your dreams really are trying to get your waking mind to understand about your own feelings.

2007-09-30 19:33:40 · answer #4 · answered by Xanadu 5 · 0 0

It's unresolved...you need to talk through it and aspects of your dreams with a close friend, or maybe even your ex, once you understand his motivations it will be easier to move on. Our dreams are a reflection of our repressed thoughts, we don't want to think about. Confront it and you'll be able to relax.

2007-09-30 19:33:42 · answer #5 · answered by Amber R 2 · 0 0

You just need to find something to do. Stop thinking about it. Try self hypnosis. You just need a vent. Keep yourself busy. Don't worry that they are moving closer to you. Keep in mind that you are happy with your husband and you don't have a need to cooperate with your ex unless it involves your daughter.

2007-09-30 19:30:56 · answer #6 · answered by Kyrstin R 2 · 0 0

its the subconcious mind. if you didn't find closure or you were never really... ready for it to end. it could cause a problem. i'm still in high school but i had a relationship where the same similar thing happend (but onlyf or a few months). i went to the guy (he'd cheated on me) and was like "you f***ing ba****d i f***ing hate you, you f***ing f***!!!"... anyway i pretty much exploded and when i was done he appoligized said he didn't know i felt that way the dreams stopped and sadly i forgave him (i know i'm stupid like that) and now we're actually pretty close now (no just friends i NEVER date exs). so just talk to him if you can bear it

2007-09-30 19:31:51 · answer #7 · answered by Adelina K 1 · 0 1

I think deep down inside, you really have a fantasy of you and your new husband swinging with the two of them......

That's why you keep dreaming of them...

2007-09-30 19:29:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

what kind of dreams? What do they do in the dreams?need alot more onfo.

2007-09-30 22:07:59 · answer #9 · answered by Dave S 2 · 0 0

the dream your having is what he has done to you. and honesty you still love him fact. in my opion?

2007-09-30 21:01:24 · answer #10 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0 0

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