Does anyone think this type of treatment could cause psychological damage to the woman involved? What would cause a man to not want to have sex with his wife? I was in my thirties then. I was still young and pretty.
2007-09-30 05:44:27 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
maybe he turned gay.......was having an affair, or was not in love or attracted to you any longer.
2007-09-30 05:47:53 · answer #1 · answered by Angelbaby7 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it does a great deal of psychological damage to the woman involved. I know. What would cause a man to not want to have sex with his wife? Preference for other than normal sexual activity, be it with another male or a child. Something that prevents him from functioning like a normal male with a woman of comparable age. However, in an effort to disguise their preferences and pretend THEY are okay, they will denigrate the woman they are with until the woman feels inadequate as a woman, and as a human being as well. It affects all aspects of your personal and professional life, in that you lose confidence in yourself and your abilities. You could have been the most beautiful thing walking, and it would not have made any difference because he was the failure, not you. I am glad you say you divorced him. I hope by now you realize there was and is nothing wrong with you.
2007-09-30 05:57:22 · answer #2 · answered by claudiacake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
About five years ago my honey and I had the same problem. Yes we too divorced (Currently living together again)over this. My feelings were just crushed! I took it all personally. Through lots and lots of talking I have come to understand between work (he worked for Ford Glass, VERY HOT in the plant) the heat exhaustion, pressure from me (Yes, I am a whiner) and just stress of not getting "tension release" of his own all compounded the problem. After divorce and being apart a year, a major job change for him, we started talking again (when he picked up the boys)and just doing stuff with the kids a friendship rekindled and one afternoon of some HOT peel you off the ceiling sex, things got restarted. Things are good now.
This happened in a different relationship of mine as well. Turned out man was a pedophile and just didn't like grown ups. Sick I know!
The point I am making is 98% of the time, it is enternal for the man. Nothing to do with you as well as nothing you could have done to improve it. For the 2% that is the women, than the relationship itself was hopless or the men were so selfcentered they were not worth the time and energy to keep it going.
2007-09-30 06:00:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Psychological damage? I guess that would depend on the woman and how good her coping skills are. If a man doesn't want to have sex with his wife, well there could be many reasons. The primary one...he doesn't feel that way about her anymore. Does this matter now that you two are divorced? Learn from it, move on and try not to make the same mistakes the second time around.
2007-09-30 05:47:48 · answer #4 · answered by CC 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think usually in situations like that it's usually the other person who has some kind of interior issues going on with themselves like depression. i can see how it could have damaged your self image and made you feel unattractive, but the odds are good that it had more to do with him than you. if he never gave you an explanation as to why he didn't want to be intimate, then he probably had some inner turmoil that he himself probably didn't understand either. a lot of times when people have depression, they lose interest in a lot of things, including sex, so that could be a possibility in your situation. it's also possible that he was seeing someone else. from personal experience i've noticed that when a person is having an outside relationship they tend to hold off on intimacy with their initial partner. i don't really think that this could cause serious psychological damage in someone that didn't have a predisposition for it. yea, it'd probably bum you out in a big way for a while, but eventually there's going to be another man that wants to be your partner emotionally and physically.
2007-09-30 05:52:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
All jokes aside... he was/is a f**king retard. I never understand any man who turns down sex, or doesn't want to make love to his wife. Either he was cheating on you, or it took him 30+ years to "realize" that he's gay.
It may cause psychological damage to the woman, but oftentimes I don't see how. Even if they're not getting attention from their signifcant other, most women get outside affirmation that they "still have it", whether it's welcomed or not. Men hit on women all the time. Surely you must've encountered this while out and about in your life? At a mall? In a restaurant? Anywhere, while your husband wasn't around? Whatever the case, don't let his rejection harm you too much.
There are a thousand guys out there who would treat you like a queen and give you the attention you deserve.
2007-09-30 05:51:38 · answer #6 · answered by gabound75 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I don't know if it would cause serious psychological damage, you may feel hurt that the fact that he didn't want to have sex anymore. He may have been cheating on you, feeling guilty about it and not want to have sex with you at all. It has nothing to do with you, really.
Some men marry a skinny woman and the woman got bigger during the marriage. Maybe, some men like it when a woman initiates it first. Maybe he had a dysfunction and he didn't want to have sex...there could be numerous reasons why he didn't want to have sex anymore...
2007-09-30 05:50:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
your husband was the one with issues about having sex was he like this before you married or after wards?
I don't think that it was your fault that your husband didn't want to have sex with you he was the one with the problem not you and some times it can be psychological for the woman but, you are not at fault in this so move on and you will find someone that will make you happy mentally as well as physically.
best of luck
2007-09-30 06:00:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He could either...
1. Be impotent, or...
2. Be cheating on you.
If he's impotent, he'd be too embarassed to have sex and even more embarassed to tell you about it. But if that wasn't the case, he could have been seeing another woman, and thus, he wouldn't be interested in having sex with you.
Under the circumstances you described, divorce would seem like a good option.
2007-09-30 05:49:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
He was the one with the problem not you he was either gay , impotent or suffered from a mental disorder like depression and yes that treatment probably did cause psychological damage to you like low self esteem..
2007-09-30 05:56:53 · answer #10 · answered by Confused 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, I don't think that you were the cause or the reason, but I do understand why you might be feeling this way. i think you should see a counselor and talk about how you are feeling. It has obviously hurt you and may affect you in your current relationship (give you sexual hang-ups). Good luck!
2007-09-30 06:24:03 · answer #11 · answered by ladybug 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋