is 62 and this man "Bill" is like 73. He is total opposite of my dad, and he does stupid b.s. to my Mom like if he thinks she takes too long visiting with her family while he is home, he will call up another lady friend and take her to dinner. Anyway, this type of treatment is new to my Mother because my Dad never acted so stupid. The newest thing was yesterday. She called me and said she wanted the picture back of my Dad that I had taken of him up in the mountains in Montana on vacation and had frammed for her after he died, which she gave back to me after she moved in with Bill. I ask her was she putting it up at Bill's house and the way she answered "yep!" I knew it was a revenge move. I said why, does Bill have a picture up of his wife? She said 'yep!" and I told her no, that I wasn't going to allow her to use my Dad's picture for some stupid little immature jealousy game over two people that have died! Then I hung up. Was I right or wrong. Please be honest.
2007-09-30 05:19:23 · 18 answers · asked by Corona 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I agree with you. This is totally childish. What is the sense in using two dead people for your silly disagreements. Sounds rather strange to say the least.
2007-09-30 06:18:48 · answer #1 · answered by goodness 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're right, she shouldn't be doing this out of revenge but mostly she shouldn't be subjected to Bill. What a jerk she must be. Hopefully, your mom will wake up and get out before it's too late. 62 is still young and she can have a lot of good years to be happy and not be around somebody like Bill. She will never find anybody else that is your dad, but there are plenty of good men out there who will love and respect her. Bill doesn't sound like he's that kind of man. As for the picture. It's perfectly acceptable to have pictures of one's deceased spouse because that is part of your past and memories. But it shouldn't be done as revenge.
2007-09-30 05:26:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Katie, I so know how you mother feels, and for that reason? Understand she's not ready to talk...maybe will someday, so you need to get your feelings out through a good grief counselor and believe me, there are some wonderful ones (as I know firsthand myself...) Grief is a different journey for each of us...No two people grieve quite alike Katie...And just because someone gives the appearances of forging on with a smile on their face? Hardly equates to what they may be feeling inside...We humans like to "hide" not bother people with our deepest hurts and troubles...Does that make sense to you? I'm so sorry you lost your Dad honey, I truly am. I was a "Daddy's girl" too and even though far older than you when he died? I cried like a baby for a couple of years after...No kidding. How could I not miss the guy who thought I could do no wrong and took every opportunity to tell me he loved me unconditionally? He was a real sweetheart... I hope you will find a counselor to talk to about your Dad, unless you have an Aunt or Uncle you feel more comfortable talking to and would be willing to do so. You need someone to talk to about this Katie and I hope you find someone soon. God Bless honey... Grace
2016-05-17 09:33:54 · answer #3 · answered by shawn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wrong...That is Ur mom never hang up on Ur mom.. That Bill is an a--hole and need to be put in his place. Your Mom does not have to stoop to his level to get him back just ignore the fact that he is trying to bring things in between them.. She should ask him..Bill do U think that is fair that you have Ur deceased wife picture in own home on the wall or where ever it is. My Dear...
If he gets ugly then U should give it to her and let her put her husband up. and see how he like that. Why did Ur Mom marry this person did she not see the signs.. Don't tell me love. Make a copy and give it to her.
2007-09-30 05:30:03 · answer #4 · answered by oneglook 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The behavior is exactly what should be happenign. Your mother needs to establish a relatioship that he wants from her marriage with Bill. Your mother is old enough to know how she should react, trust her to make the correct decisions for the situation. If things get to the point where she is unhappy, let her know that she does not need Bill, especially if she is unhappy...
2007-09-30 05:30:30 · answer #5 · answered by Boydness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing. The picture would probably end up destroyed by "Bill". They both sound like a couple of juveniles.
2007-09-30 05:35:53 · answer #6 · answered by drewxjacobs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your mom got herself a loser! Revenge games don't work and I understand how you feel about having your father's picture used in this way.
2007-09-30 05:24:40 · answer #7 · answered by missingora 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you were completely right, that is a stupid, immature thing to do. I think you should also sit down with your mom and let her know how you feel.
2007-09-30 05:24:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
totally right. this guy sounds like a total ***. u cant tell ur mom who to marry but shes gonna have to find out the hard way. hes an *** and she will only learn by the way that he will treat her. good luck! im sry!
2007-09-30 05:29:34 · answer #9 · answered by Hannah G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were so right. Don't get involved in their petty games, and don't help her include your father's memory in them either. Just keep out of it as much as possible.
I'm sorry to hear you're having to deal with this. I hope it gets better for you.
2007-09-30 05:24:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋