My ex-boyfriend broke up with me 7 months ago. It was so painful and so hurtful. After the break up, I wanted to cut all communication so I can move on but he was calling me for the last 6 moths not to do it that it's too hard and we'll loose each other He emailed me a month ago when I was saying good bye that he is so scared to loose me, he is too scared that he is making a mistake, he was very sad to say good bye, he was begging me not to forget him and he was even telling me that he needs to find himself and he can see himself with me in the future. But when I called him last week he didn't have time, he sounded bothered when I called him, he told me he didn't want to spend his time on the phone and he basically finished the conversation in a fast way without giving me the chance to talk to him. and since then he has not called. That's why I don't understand. He basically walked away and didn't call me back when a month ago, he was sending me such email. I just cannot understand?
2007-09-29 21:12:13 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
So sorry baby, but it sounds like "Gee, I want to be free to "find myself" - read experiment, sleep around - but I want you waiting on the side in case I don't find myself something better".
2007-09-29 21:24:09 · answer #1 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's simple: he wanted to leave having the upper hand in the situation. When he broke up with you, you were devastated but you had a successful strategy for recovering: you cut off communication and moved on.
Well, that's not quite what he expected. He wanted your life to dramatically fall apart, showing how utterly indispensable he was. It didn't. You were about to move on and he freaked out, thinking you were actually going to put the relationship behind you and have a great life.
You caved. You called him. He had you where he wants you you - in the role of the person who would like him back. So what fun to be able to be cold to you and show you that he's the top dog in that relationship and as top dog, he's taking his bone and leaving you high and dry.
Yeah, he's a jerk.
2007-10-03 20:42:43 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol..sorry but he sounds very confused, to be honest I don't understand either, but he sounds unstable & unreliable.
I think you wer very wise to want to cut all communication with him. He doesn't sound like he knows what he's doing, If you want to be happy, without emotional ups & downs, then walk away now.
I don't want to sound horrible but he'd be no good for you. He's right, he needs to find himself, just wish him well, thank him for the times you had together & say good bye....
2007-09-29 21:19:20 · answer #3 · answered by glgl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He was probably sitting there drunk when he emailed you ,he is a waste of your time i bet you felt sorry for him when you got his email .well at least you will know better next time you get a message from him send him one back saying you have moved on and so should he.
2007-09-29 22:01:11 · answer #4 · answered by marzypan 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The sad truth is that a month ago he was lonely. Now, he is not. Forget him and move on. He obviously is doing so.
2007-09-29 21:15:21 · answer #5 · answered by lyllyan 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i broke up with my gf recently also and i realized im doing the same thing. i see myself worrying that your gonna get hurt by another guy and thats why we send those i cant be without you letters, but in reality when it comes down to it to talk to you we hesitate and revert to being mad at you or being sad
2007-09-29 21:17:27 · answer #6 · answered by Napkins 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry Violet, but he sounds like a real creep. I think a lovely lady like you is a lot better off without him.
2007-09-29 21:17:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Honey I wouldn't even bother with a man that is "needy" one minute and ignorant the next.
Move on to a better life without him in it.
2007-09-29 21:16:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
There is no human requirement to understand everything. Move on.
2007-09-29 21:17:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it could be this or it could be that..but Im certain he has met someone else and is feeling guilty when talking to you..move on before he breaks up with her and starts calling again..and he will
2007-09-30 01:51:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋