My husband and i got married for the wrong reason. things are getting worst each time. when he went to his country to visit his family he cheated on me with a prostitute. Before that, there were times that we spended more the six months without having sex, and now, we have two months without it, cause im afraid to get a STD from him. i told him to go to the doc. and get himself check for any disease, he said he would at the beginning, but now he refuses. Anyways, i met this guy over the internet, and we've been chating and on the phone for days now. we did had phone sex, it was amazing, long time didn't felt that way before. Do you think this was cheating? i have 2 kids and don't wanna lose them, can someone be honest and tell me what to do or what this is?
2007-09-29 18:26:25 · 15 answers · asked by Lavender 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes. You are sharing an intimacy with someone other than your husband. It looks like you two have already left the building. Why don't one of you file already?
2007-09-29 18:36:22 · answer #1 · answered by Pamela B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think that what you did is bad and cheating in a way. I think you should try to make your marriage work and if it doesn't then get out and date other men. I would express your feelings to your husband and tell him that if he wants some sex he needs to go to the doctor. Also, I would tell him how what he did hurt you and maybe you could consider marriage counseling. I would pray about what you should do. Don't let your husband refuse to see a doctor. He should be willing to do that for you at least. Stop talking to men online and work on finding a job, getting some money so that if you need to leave your husband or decide to split later you can care for your little ones. Good luck to you.
2007-09-30 01:59:28 · answer #2 · answered by lovehawaii_23 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay to be completely honest with you:YES this is phone sex....which most people will consider "cheating on your spouse"....but IF you and your hubby is doing this and going through this drama,then you don't need to stay married!If there is really nothing between you and your hubby and you two got married for the wrong reason,then you need to get out of that relationship NOW!!!! Because all you two are doing is hurting the kids more than yourself,and the kids DON'T need that.All they are doing is seeing you two go through heck and they are innocent in this situation! IF anything do it for your kids and yourself.Good luck on your situation.
2007-09-30 01:34:10 · answer #3 · answered by bambi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there,
I think that having phone sex is cheating. But by the sounds of it your husband has been very unfaithful towards you, so why shouldn't you return the favour? Revenge sometimes make you feel better. It's normal for us to lust, if we don't get it from our partner it's normal to go somewhere else for affection.
2007-09-30 01:50:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If its that bad I would suggest going to marriage counciling and if that doesn't work, get a divorce. Anyway, cheating by thinking of, touching and talking with the other sex may equally be as damaging to one of the parties. Emotional cheating may be correlated to that of emotional abuse, which to date is treated as seriously in a court of law as physical cheating. With the expansion of understanding of other cultures, there is a wide spectrum of what cheating means. When in a committed relationship, the definition of cheating is based on both parties opinions and both parties may redefine their understanding to match the party at an either lower or higher extreme of this definition.
Many people consider cheating to be any violation of the mutually agreed-upon rules or boundaries of a relationship, which may or may not include sexual monogamy. For example, in some polyamorous relationships, the concepts of commitment and fidelity do not necessarily hinge on complete sexual or emotional monogamy. Whether polyamorous or monogamous, the boundaries to which people agree vary widely, and sometimes these boundaries evolve within each relationship.
2007-09-30 01:30:08 · answer #5 · answered by Sabure 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Yes, that was cheating. As sad as a story as yours is, there is no denying the fact that you cheated on your husband. Two wrongs don't make a right.
You two seriously need to work on your marriage. If you or he are unwilling to even try to fix your marriage, then don't prolong the inevitable.
2007-09-30 01:46:39 · answer #6 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely cheatings if having phone sex not your husband and if your husband never have the knowledged of that conversations you have with another guy.
2007-09-30 04:00:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all great job on making him get tested. i hate to say get a divorce but it seems that its the only way out of this situation. and after that date a little. take your time and make sure your in love befor you get married and the most important thing is to never forget your kids
2007-09-30 01:33:28 · answer #8 · answered by clue-less and gay 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes that is cheating. if i ever found out my husband had phone sex with someone he could pack his **** and go be with her. to me it seems as if it time for you to move on before the situation get out of control
2007-09-30 01:49:43 · answer #9 · answered by fefe03 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I would not consider phone sex cheating. Unless you physically have sex with someone, or have a physical relationship with them, its not really cheating. The way your marriage sounds, I would suggest to just get a divorce. Usually the kids stay with the mother.
2007-09-30 01:31:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋