How do you handle this?

Question

Okay here's the story...about a year ago my husband went on vacation back home without me. A friend of his introduced him to his girlfriend and her friend who's husband was deployed so she hung out with them a lot. I guess the couple this girl and my husband went out together on several occassions, which I wasn't a huge fan of. She then sent him a friend request on myspace and after he got home proceeded to email him a lot. I told him how much I didn't like it and it seemed weird that she got so 'friendly' after hanging out for like two weeks...he agreed and that was that. Then, just the other day I was taking a peek at my husband's myspace account and this chick had sent him an email out of nowhere (she hasn't been in touch with him for at least 6 months or so). The email, in my eyes, was incredibly inappropriate. She told him how she never ever has sex dreams, but had one starring him and she thanked him for putting a smile on her face all day and hoped that it made him smile too. Seriously?? Oh, and this girl is married. I'm pretty peeved about the email and was wondering what you guys think of the situation? I can't really say anything to my husband cause then it just looks like I was snooping in his myspace....bad I know....

Hahaah, I thought the same thing...but her husband doesn't have a myspace, I looked. They didn't go out together alone, they went out with his best friend and girlfriend. But still, I know what you are saying. He didn't respond because he doesn't have access to his account and hasn't for about 5 months or so.

Answer 1

I think you need to let him know. What did your husband write back to her and it was extremely innapropiate that she was with him the whole time in the 2 weeks vacation. You should go on her myspace and find her husbands myspace and foward to him what she wrote to your husband. You never know if they have kept on talking or not. I mean its very easy to press delete on myspace. You need to write her back yourself and tell her that what kind of married women is she to be all over a married man the way she is.

Answer 2

How can a wife be snooping when you are suppose to share everything you keep no secrets from each other. So what idiot told you that you were snooping. Any wife knows in order to keep your husband and your marriage together there is some snooping going on. I know you heard the saying (The wife is always the last one to know) It's the ones who doesn't snoop that are the last ones to know or the ones who say i never saw it coming i thought we had a good marriage . You need to ask him what the hell is going on with you and this other girl. If he says to you, why was you snooping in my space say to him why are you keeping secrets from me your my husband your not suppose to have secrets specially with another woman. If i were you,him getting mad at me would be the last thing on my mind or worried about. He really can't get mad because he is total in the wrong here and if he does that is a sign of guilt right there. The only thing you are guilty of is trying to save your marriage. You say she has not been in contact with him for 6 months and out of the blue there she is talking about a sex dream with him and that should put a smile on his face for the whole day.You really don't know if they have be in contact. Does your husband have a cell phone and if so couldn't they be texting one another. Look something is going on with the two of them and if you believe what your husband is telling you you are definitely going to lose him to her. Stop listening to him and do something before it's to late. Please don't think that your husband wouldn't cheat or leave you for another woman because i am living proof that they do. I like you did not want to believe that my husband was capable of hurting me like he did but he did.

Answer 3

You have every right as his wife to look on his my space, his emails, his phone messages..........what ever. He is a married man and when it comes to other women, you are entitled to find out exactly what he is doing and saying. Get a key logger or a web watcher and find out everything he is receiving and sending.

You don't have to sit with blind eyes while he cheats or another woman puts the make on him.

I would tell him I read her email and that you are very angry about it and now you are suspicious that he may have had sex with this woman while on his trip back to his old home. I would also email her and tell her not to have anymore contact with your husband.

I agree with Carol above, find her husbands my space and forward her email to your husband to him. Definitely. He has the right to know what his sleazy wife is doing too.

Answer 4

You should be talking to your husband....there was or is far more going on with this stupid woman then what you think....Your husband went out with her several times alone! HELLOOOO!!! Yes you were snooping....but now you need to fess up to it and ask your husband just what the hell happened those two weeks!

Answer 5

Obsessive much? I agree about the vacation thing, but snooping on his myspace? I think you need to take a good long look at what you're doing. Because if you keep it up, you're going to destroy your marriage because of jealousy and not trusting your husband to do the right thing.

Answer 6

are you sure nothing happened between them ? you positive he hasn't ben talking to her in any other way? sounds weird after 5 months outta the blue she is just gonna email him . to bad if he gets mad you are looking you obviosly have good reason to . i think you need to tell him to write her back and tell her she is being inappropriate and he isn't interested in her , and block her from his page, or you e mail her and tell her to find her own man