How to move on?

Question

I'm 21 and going through major growing pains.... I have gotton bad news from a person I love and am learning how to truely forgive for the first time in my life. Please give me suggestions on how to start a future without dwelling on the past. How do I put images of the past out of my head so I have a chance at the future?

Answer 1

You can't put the images out of your mind, you can't forget the past, and don't loss sight of the fact that the future is built on the past, meeting the present. All that aside its time to learn exactly what unconditional love is and weather or not its going to save you by its merit alone, because hunnie it most certain well not. See your dealing with the fact that deep down you don't love him unconditional, not at all, I know you've got lots and lots of love for him. But this incident in the past proves you do have conditions, you do EXPECT certain things from him. He failed and now you hurt, because he didn't live up to them. Now you need to come to terms with the NEW truth behind who he is, can you live with that? can you love that? Because you have to accept that was HIM. And thats what hurts the most, it isn't the dening what he did, its the accepting, which YOU HAVE NO CHOICE! You most accept, thats how you move past it, thats how you insure that chance at a future, thats HOW YOU GROW IN A RELAITOSHIP! Love is a battle where all the scars are worn on our heart.

Answer 2

This is a little hard to answer without more details, but it sounds like someone you love has hurt you and possibly betrayed your trust. It will take time to get over that and to re-establish trust. But if you truly believe the person is sorry and you believe he/she will not hurt you again, then you can move on to a happy future. Realize that as human beings, we make mistakes and we deserve a chance to make things right. However, if this person burns you again, you'll probably have to seriously consider moving on in order to protect yourself and focus on relationships where you both give and receive satisfaction.

Best of luck to you!