he says how much he loves me more than anything & how precious i am to him, wants me to have his kids & get married but the actions are : hides his phone, so i do too, he doesnt answer half the time, the the last girl he dated when we broke up in january lives 4miles away from him & his friends say he wants his cake & eat it too... Why is he playing mind games with me? he said he loves me so much. we see each other once a week, @my house, he stays over which includes sex, but we're not an official couple. We havn't been in public in 9 months. Why does he do this to me? Im still in love w him but i know i should cut him out of my life. He blames me for staying away from me so much because of the mean words( which are accusations of being w the other girl, Lindsey) He blames me for everything. How can i be stronger and just ignore this craziness. (it's actually worse than words can describe.)
2007-09-27 19:20:07 · 6 answers · asked by ceecoffee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You are a side dish in the diner of his life.
You are a convenient pit stop.
He has no respect for you or anyone else.
Quit answering his phone calls.
Quit meeting him.
Quit putting out.
QUIT selling yourself short!
2007-09-27 19:25:12 · answer #1 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes when it gets to this point in a relationship it is entirely sabatoged by lonng-term emotional/psychological imprints that stay with you throughout the relationship to a point where it seems impossible to turn around. you may or may not feel this but if it has happened it may be best to let it go. at least give yourself some time and space away from him for a while. ~you should clearly define who you are to him and that you don't agree with the values you have apparently layed out for him in the past, that you have changed and you don't want to carry out a relationship like this any more. it's too hurtful and make you feel too vulnerable and cheap. okay i've been there before, and it came to a point where i realised we had both changed so much we became only friends and quit having sex b/c we could only reflect upon one another the negative that we used to know in eachother but chose to ignore because of the way we had idealised one another so long ago...
Basically I think you need to talk to him and say things are different, kick up with the attitude you wish to embody. you will feel much better when you just allow yourself to be honest, and you'll find out whether or not this guy can have any part of your life any more. tc xXo
2007-09-27 19:36:54 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. Floats_Ur_Boat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you cant ignore him or your feelings for him. So girl, ya gotta deal with it all. You kno in your heart that something isnt right; sounds like it to me too.
You have lots of reason to feel this way ... especially if his friends are telling you so. Games? no, he just wants all of it: you and whatever else he is doing on his cell and the rest of the week.
Not being out in public? for 9 mos?!!!
You sound better than just a once a week shackup at your place. There are so many guys out there willing to give you more, like what you want. And yes, he is trying to hold you emotionally with the love talk. In fact, he may even mean it, but with all this other stuff going on the side, is that the kind of life you wanna live now or down the road??? yikes!!
Dont settle for s*%t girl. Life is too short not to get what we want outa of it if it makes us happy and we arent breakin any rules. Find someone else that will give you that. And kno that there are other guys that will give you just that. For that reason alone - BE STRONG.
If you have to cut his ties gradually as you get stronger and believe you r, then do it that way. Nothin says ya just gotta go cold turkey. Do what works best for u, but lose this one ... enjoy your friends, go out and have fun without him - and show yourself that you can be happy without him. :) Good luck!
2007-09-27 20:00:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow. let me tell you some secrets that i'll never forget. Do you ever wonder why the beginning of relationships are always so great? It is because when you first get together you are looking for reasons to like the person, you are appreciating them. But as time goes on, you find something about them that doesnt please you, and you say " well i dont like that", and as you put your attention upon it, it adds power to it, so you will see more of it. And as you find even more and more things "wrong" with him they will keep showing up. So you have two choices. Either let him go and move on, or make a list of postive aspects of him, in your spare times with a notebook, and imagine him in that way for 2 minutes often throughout the day. In time you will have added power to that and those positive aspects you have written about him will all start expanding. The choice is yours.
2007-09-27 19:27:10 · answer #4 · answered by Keith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is alot going on in that paragraph. Im sorry to hear your going through it.
In my opinon you need to ask yourself a couple of questions.
1. What do you want from your relationship with him?
2. Is he providing what you want?
3. Could you/would you still love him if he doesnt provide it?
and lastly,
4. would you be happy with him treating you like this for the rest of your life?
After you ask yourself that, then you will need to talk to him about it. Tell him how you feel about things, tell him what you dont like, tell him what needs to change for you to be happy.
If he tries, mayby its worth staying till he reverts, if he does. If he walks, you need to be prepaired for it.
It sounds like you have already made up your mind, and your just looking for support.
Listen to your inner voice, be brave, and do what youve been wanting to do.
2007-09-27 19:35:09 · answer #5 · answered by David Parker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DUMP HIM! You can obviously do much better!
2007-09-27 19:53:34 · answer #6 · answered by sazzie79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋