Can you trust a woman who doesn't want to be pregnant to manage her pregnancy?

Question

If abortion were illegal, that is, or if men had the right to have the woman go through with the pregnancy so they could raise it. Please note: I'm not asking SHOULD you, but rather, is it logical to expect that to always happen? If a woman doesn't want to be pregnant and resents being forced to go through with a pregnancy, can you expect that they'll always do all the things a pregnant woman has to do to ensure a healthy pregnancy, like pre-natal care, abstaining from smoking and drinking, etc? What about drug addicts? Can you expect that they will give up using drugs during the course of the pregnancy?

Answer 1

I don't think you could.

Certainly if I were forced to bear a child against my will as if were some prized mare I would do everything I could to escape my plight.

Women are not brood mares, to be impregnated and made to carry it to term so that another person can have "their" child.
Forcing a woman to be an unwilling "incubator" (which is what you would reduce her to, nothing more than a "vessel") sounds a lot like slavery to me.

Answer 2

It could absolutely be related to stress. If she's lost or gained weight recently, that could effect her period, also. Her exercise routine, the amount of fat in her body, even her diet could effect her cycle, so don't worry too much about it (easier said than done, I know). Women don't actually need to bleed every month. As long as she bleeds at least 4 times a year, that is enough to shed her uterine lining and stay healthy. So missing a period here and there shouldn't be cause for concern. Have her keep a record of when she gets them, how long they last for, and if she has any other symptoms that go along with her period (cramps, headaches, etc.) and her weight and activity level for the month. After a few months, looking back at her record could show a pattern.

Answer 3

Even when abortion has been illegal, women did it.

I like the way you posted this question, as it cuts very close to the subject of caring about people than unborn babies (your other question does also, but I figured I would chime in here.)

While I am of the opinion that you should not run the risk of making babies if you do not absolutely want one, and have the necessary support system to properly raise one, I am also of the opinion that an unwanted child is already at a severe disadvantage.

As a 32 year old male with no children, who is not likely to create any, I may not be the best authority on the subject, but... I don't want children, therefore, I have never made a girl pregnant (condoms and other forms of birth control are, after all, very cheap (and even FREE, if you know where to look and whom to apply to) so why even run the risk?

As a male, I am, of necessity, pro-choice. That ball will never fully be in my court. Should one of my partners be knocked up, she can take the option she wants, regardless of what I wish. If she decides to keep it, then sign me as Daddy, I'll be there. I am fortunate enough to be in a position to responsibly make that choice (the child has a college fund, even though no child is planned nor forthcoming). I've taught children, watched children, and cared for them all my life. If she wants to abort, that is up to her. There is such a difference in the potential life of a child who has been prepared for, and eagerly awaited, and the child who will be talked about in a Dave Chappelle skit for being on a street corner, in diapers, at four in the morning.

Answer 4

I'm a drug counselor in training and so I'm glad you brought that up...I'm going to deviate from the topic somewhat and say that there are plenty of pregnant women out there who DO want their babies and still have a hard time managing their pregnancies. Drug addicts and alcoholics have a very hard time giving up the chemicals, and it's not because they don't "love" their babies, or because they don't care. Drug addiction is a disease, and it is something that is best recognized as such. Pregnant women who have addictions usually need direct intervention in order to stop using the chemicals they are addicted to during pregnancy. Their bodies are physically dependent. They are psychologically dependent, as well. "Denial" is a hallmark trait of this disease. When a person is in denial, they minimize the severity of the problem. They truly believe they are not harming themselves (or the baby) and that is why it's imperative that someone intercede on behalf of the baby and the mother. This is hard to do, since the addict will avoid situations where their addiction might be detected. But let me be clear on this: this can happen to women who truthfully desire a healthy, happy baby. It is a huge mistake to think that the woman does not care what happens to the pregnancy. Addiction is a very complex disease.

Answer 5

I'm not certain there's a correlation. I know that there are women who want children who make irresponsible decisions while pregnant but I also know personally of one woman who was pregnant and under pressure from her pro-life family, kept the child, though she did not want to have a child. She quit smoking and drinking.

I don't think that a woman who doesn't want children is necessarily going to be any less conscientious when faced with the prospect. many might well take the view that, to make the best of a bad situation, they ought to behave responsibly.

I would never assume that a woman wasn't capable of separating the unjustness of her circumstances from the welfare of the child she is unfortunately being forced to carry.

Answer 6

I think it's safe to say some women will not change their habits for a fetus they do not want. I have been told it is harder for a woman to deliver if she has no desire too. And I would go so far as wondering if there would be any affects on the child merely from the mother not wanting them, even if the mother took all of the precautions necessary to keep the child healthy.

Answer 7

There's two sides to this and I think its a question of what kind of person the woman is. If she is loving and nurturing in nature, she will love the child no matter how she was forced or how much it was unwanted. But if she despises motherhood or did not want to be pregnant and have the burden of childre, yes, I would not trust her to manage a healthy pregnancy.

As for drug addicts - its like smokers. If they love this child enough, they will give smoking/drugs/drinking up for its sake. If they are irresponsible or just don't care, again I wouldn't trust them. If they have the will power, they will have the way - there's no excuse. This is human life we are discussing here.

Answer 8

It almost depends on the person.
Sometimes a woman that does not want children and becomes PG turns into a more protective Mother than normal after birth of child.

Answer 9

I expect that if abortion becomes illegal than there will be many children with health problems and special needs.

Edit maybe we will know by comparing in countries where abortion is illegal and legal..how many babys were born pre mature or low birth weights or FAS/drug withdrawl and also small children with development problems?

Answer 10

Actually, women would do what they used to do - get abortions in illegal clinics, where they used coat hangers to kill the babies (and often the women died too.) Or they'd take Rx drugs, drink and/or smoke, and avoid prenatal care in the hopes of miscarrying.