My husband has a really good job now but he is looking to work at a bigger hospital. He interviewed last week in CA (we live in Florida) and was so excited about the job. He said the interview went great. Well they called today and told him they offered the job to someone else. He said he is fine with it but I can tell he is bummed..What are some encouraging things I can say to him?
2007-09-27 09:42:14 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is the directory of pharmacy here at a small hospital and would like to go to a large hospital.
2007-09-27 09:51:52 · update #1
In all of life, nothing happens by accident ever! Where one door closes another one opens. I have had alot of things like that happen. Everything happens just as its supposed to happen, everything is perfectly as it should be. That is not encouraging just practical if you can see past what has really happened. Some people may say its spiritual and in a way it is but that is the way the universe does things. If he really wants to move to California, there will be plenty of opportunity to do so, I know he will have more offers. Do not fret, it will come sooner than you think.
2007-09-27 09:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by soniaatcalifornia 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There are lots of cliches......better luck next time, must be something better out there for you, it's not important, be thankful you have a good job because not everyone does, their loss, etc. But I think the most important thing any man wants to hear from his wife is that he is still HER choice no matter what happens. Of course he will be "bummed", and you can share a moment or two of being "bummed" right along with him. Then remind him that the only choice he has in the situation is to decide how he's going to feel about it, how he's going to let it affect him. The best response to any disappointment is "pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again." With your help.
2007-09-27 09:51:24 · answer #2 · answered by transplanted_fireweed 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am currently in a similar situation and have come in second on a couple of job offers. In fact I was called in on one job offer five times before they decided not to hire for the position and it took me awhile to get over it.
You can ask if he wants to talk about it, but give him his space if he doesn't. Tell him there are many people competing for jobs now and he did well on the interview. I would also keep in contact with the people he interviewed on the chance that the person they hire doesn't work out or another opportunity arises.
Also consider the cost of living in California is usually higher than Florida so he needs to be sure he is properly compensated.
2007-09-27 09:51:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that there was a reason for it which you might never know. Maybe the trip there would have been a disaster, or CA will slide into the ocean next week (I hope not since thats where I am), or something better is waiting for him. Im not sure if he has a religious belief, or one in karma, or just a belief in signs and destiny.. but any of those would make an answer like that feel right.
2007-09-27 09:47:46 · answer #4 · answered by Gandalf Parker 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep letting him know that you beleive in him and that the right thing will come along. Some guys, however, don't like hearing the old if it's meant to be adage, but you could surprise him with something nice like his favorite dinner or a romantic night and let him know it is because you are so proud of him for all the things he does. The fact that you went out of your way to not only tell, but show him, will surely mean a lot.
2007-09-27 09:46:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough one because for some men, they want to drop it and move on, other's need to hear the reassurance from their wives and for others, nothing helps.
personally, I wouldn't adress the specific job unless he brings it up, but I'd make sure to remind him how much you appreciate all he's doing to better the life for your family.
Men define themselves by how well they provide for their families in a lot of cases, so make sure he know how great your lives are because of what he is doing. Often, I have to remind my husband that God has a plan for us and it's not up to us to know what it is but if he didn't get "that job" it's only because there's something else God has in mind.
2007-09-27 09:48:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That hospital is missing out because you and he both know he would have been perfect. Now some better hospital will be able to experience his expertise. Everything happens for a reason!
2007-09-27 09:46:24 · answer #7 · answered by reCcup 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Say that even though it paid well, the cost of housing is triple and the traffic is horrible. Just look on google earth at any CA city and see how many houses there are crammed together. It might make him feel better.
2007-09-27 09:46:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When things like that happen to me it is a bumming moment but one thing that first pops into my head when things dont quite work out the way i had hoped was a saying that my mom said things happen for a reason
2007-09-27 09:47:55 · answer #9 · answered by Vanessa 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that he was a great candidate, so if he didn't get the job, it's not because he wasn't good enough - it just wasn't meant to be. I've found that "When one door closes, another door opens," is not just a saying.
Most importantly, let him know how much you respect him and appreciate what he does for his family.
2007-09-27 09:47:01 · answer #10 · answered by Lacta-intactivist Mama! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋