We both have kids from previous marriages. We always seem to be fighting about money. He spoils his kids and refuses to give me or my children anything. He earns far more than I do and just won't understand that I can't contribute more than I do. I have never asked anything of him, yet I feel that he could sometimes buy me clothes or other expensive things. All my friends' husbands spoil them.
2007-09-27 03:36:07 · 17 answers · asked by CelesteMoone 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have to add that both his kids are adults and educated (for which he fully paid - they have no study debt) yet they're always leecing off him. My child is mentally handicapped and will never be able to look out for himself. I have always been good to their children. Even in the beginning when they refused to accept me, I was always kind to them.
2007-09-27 03:48:35 · update #1
I'm in a second marriage myself and have a child from the first marriage and I pay child support. My wife has two children from previous relationships and we have a child together. We have separate accounts but I still do for my wife as a husband should. I pay most of the bills and she takes care of the childrens needs.Anything that comes up financially we try to solve these issues together. You husband should not be a financial supporter to adult children,they need to learn to stand on their own.Your husband is not a parent to adult children but a Father,he gives advice to them and only give them help in extreme emergencies.He has a responsibility to his wife and any minor or physical dependent children in the household.
2007-09-27 04:15:07 · answer #1 · answered by Thunder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay think about what you just wrote "we always seem to be fighting about money". Why are you always fighting about money, is this because you have bills and things that have to be paid and your on a budget? If this is the case you cant expect him to spoil you. As for him spoiling his children, he has the right to do that if he desires. Are your children living in the house with the two of you. If your kids are in the house with both of you he probably assumes that him taking care of the financial household is enough, especially since he has guilt for raising your kids daily and not his own. The spoiling of his children makes him feel like they know he is important to him and this is something that emotional he needs. He is a person not a walking money tree and if you wanted a sugar daddy you should of screened your relationship better to see if he had the benjamins falling out of his pocket.
2007-09-27 03:42:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
wow, sounds like talking about "US" wasnt a issue before gettign married. He and You are the new "US" and he should take care of the "US" thing first and foremost. You kids are another story, his kids are another issue as well. First things first needs to be your relationship with each other. Perhaps you all need to discuss earnings and what things are needed in your current home and family setting. This sounds a touch like a "the Jones" type of complaint, and I do not think he is attempting to get into a "spend more" battle with your X on your kids. Yes, he could and should get you, his current wife, the current "US" some of lifes things. You both need to talk before you both become 2nd divorces.
2007-09-27 03:43:26 · answer #3 · answered by Ravin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am on my second marriage....and I take care of the finances. Hubby works while I stay home with our beautiful baby girl. I have 3 teenagers with my ex husband and I am responsible for 1/2 of the educational expenses and 1/2 of any medical bills. My hubby has no problems with me giving my ex the money that I owe him....he knew that when he married me that he would also be responsible for helping me take care of my other children.
2007-09-27 03:45:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The money all needs to go into one joint account. You aren't roomates you are husband and wife. He needs to get over the thing of its his money. Its the families money now. All of the kids need to be treated equally. It doesn't matter who's kid it is. When a couple gets married and there are other kids involved they have to take them and treat them as there own. That is the only way that a true family relationship is going to exist and succeed.
2007-09-27 03:48:34 · answer #5 · answered by The Wižard 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
WEIRD! I'm in my third marriage and my spouse make 5 time what I do we just put it all in one account (which we both have access to).marriage is a partnership not two single people living together(which appears what you are doing)if you don't fix this very soon ,one day soon you will be single again.
2007-09-27 03:43:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What are you and your kids are to him if he refuse to give you and the kids anything??? Partners should share their things together even though they have kids from their previous marriages. Not you you me me situation!!! Move on !
2007-09-27 03:46:29 · answer #7 · answered by babe_of_spanish_gladiator69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
SHARE SHARE SHARE SHARE....what's mine is his, and visa versa....while my hubby brings in most of our living money, I have gotten some as well through inheritance, and over the years I have made sure my stepkids have been taken care of financially....I'm the budget person and bill payer in my house. In fact, I spent $10,000 of my inheritance money on my stepdaughter's car, and recently made sure my stepson has a nice class ring and will probably end up paying for his car too. I see it as part of the package....
I can't understand your hubby at all....
2007-09-27 03:41:12 · answer #8 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok.. first things first... Do not covet what thy neighbor has.... That being said....
In second marriages, most finances are separate due to being screwed over in the first one. So long as you're being taken care of... roof over your head, lights on, heat/ac on, food to eat, etc... AND your kids are taken care of... then where is the problem. Do you need materialistic items to be happy? He is allowed to spoil his kids... they're his! Now, is it fair to your boys? Not really, he should be doing for the whole family. Just my opinion, but you can't ask him to keep up with the Jones next door.
2007-09-27 03:40:49 · answer #9 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
For us, we each chose to have no children in both marriages... at $250,000 each to age 20, no way, and never sorry. So there is always plenty of cashola to do with what we wish. 'Sides, we figured that at 6.5 billion people on this tiny, increasingly polluted planet already, it didn't need any of ours.
2007-09-27 04:19:14 · answer #10 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋