Is it hard for shy guys to REBUILD a relationship...?

Question

with the girl they care about the most, when they have ONE main focus?

let's say this girl is someone he truly cares about and after all the drama, he has this chance to rebuild the friendship and start things slowly BUT he's so focused on saving money to get a "big investment" (house, car, etc...)

Is it hard for guys? Will they rather wait til they acheieve their goal and then rebuild things with her?

(my understanding is this: with girls, they don't wanna get started on reading a magazine when they know they'll have interruptions but will start once they know they'll have the rest of the night without any distractions...)

so it's like he doesn't wanna "kind of" being there for her but "fully" - he will give her his full attention when he's finished with this main goal and focus...

it's a fact that when men are soo FOCUSED on getting what they want, they can only think of that and they are very driven...

Answer 1

With shy guys, there's a self-esteem/confidence issue that they have to deal with. They help build that confidence by accomplishing goals, like buying a house, etc. Sort of like building up the courage to ask the girl out.

Unfortunately, this often gives them tunnel vision, in not realizing that the girl waiting in the wings doesn't care that he hasn't "gotten that house" yet, or what not - she already loves him for who he is. If you want to intermediate, just tell the guy that she wants him, and he might just hold off on his silly little diversions.

Answer 2

It sounds as if this shy guy is hiding behind this so called focus and really afraid to rebuild the relationship for whatever reason here. Maybe hes been burned before and simply chooses this other route because its easier and less painful. In this case,it willbe interesting to see what happens when he accomplishes his goal and then what excuse he can come up with. It is hard to rebuild any relationship but especially hard if one has been hurt previous and is unwilling to to get hurt again which is understandable and everyone reacts differently to that situation. So if this girl has the time to wait him out then thats what is going to have to happen or time has come to move on and find someone new here.