It's been 3 years since they offically broke up but in the past, while we were together, she would attempt to break us apart and make our lives miserable. I would find old pictures of her here and there which my husband would delete but it still upsets me. She finally got engaged and married but I still hate her with a passion. It's so bad that I have nightmares about her trying to interfere with our relationship. I've never spoke to her before but she still makes me angry. Why can't I get over it?
2007-09-26 14:20:06 · 15 answers · asked by Sweetybab3 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can't get over it because us women are territorial creatures and she is a threat to you. She will probably always remain as a threat to you becasue of her LACK OF NO MORALS OR VALUES!!! I too would be APPAULED if my husbands ex tried to attempt to break us apart, it is WRONG and it is DISGUSTING...want me to go on? People like this FLOOR me. I am sure you are a person with HIGH MORALS and VALUES and you feel threatened and appauled because you wouldn't do this to someone...treat others how you would want to be treated? Why doesn't she? Don't worry...as the old saying goes...what comes around goes around...
2007-09-26 14:40:23 · answer #1 · answered by Stacie S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are still angry because she was threatening something important to you, and maybe you felt just a little insecure that she might accomplish what she set out to do. What she did was so bold, ugly and disrespectful that you are having a hard time letting go of it. But it's time to. Just fight past it and forget about it. She is somebody else's prtoblem now, and you are the one who got the guy.
Personally, I love my husband's ex-girlfriend, even though I have never laid eyes on her. If she hadn't been so selfish and manipulative, she'd be his wife and I'd be single. Her driving him away was the best gift anyone has ever given me. (And no, I didn't break them up; I didn't even meet him until after they were over.)
2007-09-26 14:28:33 · answer #2 · answered by julz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many others have answered this question, stating true facts... jealous, get over it, insecure... etc....
BUT HOW DOES ONE GET OVER IT??
I have always found that reverse phycology is the best. If you focus so much on not liking something, guess what after a while you will and chances are you can't even remember initially why you didn't like it. It goes both ways...
Focus on sending her positive loving energy while your meditating. Work hard at it if you truely wish for the entire issue to dissolve. Perhaps it may take even weeks or months. Take a step back while your focusing and see what it is that really make you feel negatively towards her. You might find out something about yourself that is the cause. Like most of us.
2007-09-26 14:46:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She left 3 years ago and now that her ex is happily married and moved on with his life she conveniently shows up to be part of this family. I don't blame you for the way your feeling especially since this woman has a sexual past with your husband. If the family is aware of this they should consider how you could feel about having her shoved in your face all of the time. Your husband needs to understand how uncomfortable this all is on you and have a personal talk with his mother to put things in their proper place. He does not even have to bring you into it but make his mom aware that he is not happy with her being included because he has a hurtful past with her and does not want to be reminded of that since he has a wife and doesn't feel that it is appropriate. Tell your husband to tell his family to continue what relationship they want with her outside of the family and out of his view, I am sure that his mother could understand this if she wants her son to visit and be part of family gatherings if she values him and their relationship over hers? You may trust your husband but it is her that you may not be able to trust? Becoming her friend does not mean that your territory will be safe with this ex girlfriend because even best friends that have never had a sexual past with your husband have been known to cross that line or sometimes try to. This is your life and your marriage and you should not have to be worried or stressed or even feeling the way you do. She walked away from this family and she needs to do your husband a favor by walking back out of it.
2016-05-19 04:05:24 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that what makes you hate her with a Passion, is the way she behaved, because she used to be your Boyfriend's Girlfriend before you, and she did not let you or your boyfriend alone, since as you say she always was trying to come between you and him. Now, here is my Advice to you, you need to forget that she ever existed, because if you keep on brooding about her, and what she did to both of you, you will never be happy with your boyfriend and eventually he will decide that the relationship between you two, is not going to work, so, if you Love your Boyfriend i would suggest that you forget her, and try to come to terms with the memories you have of her, Anyway the one that won was you, your boyfriend chose you, and that means he loves you a lot, so don't you think that is not enough? I would think it is. Good Luck, in the future, with him, and try not to let anything come between both of you.
2007-09-26 14:43:28 · answer #5 · answered by a.vasquez7413@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only people that likes the lovers ex is someone that does not have good sense. its normal for people to hate this person. i have a bad feeling about everyone that my husband has dated, but you have to focus on you and your. and just know that if she gets him that she must have something that he wants that u don't have, and u don't need anyone that u don't have enough for. people that worry about another women feels low about who they are
2007-09-26 14:27:56 · answer #6 · answered by peachestommyleasia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did the same thing when I married my hubby and I will tell you what still makes me mad after all these years even now that we are separated I get pisses and think what if he left for her. I have nightmares pure psycho nightmares and in the end they are not in her favor lol. I don't know just unresolved hatred maybe if you had gotten to talk to her or confront the situation better because he was with her when he was with you you would of been able to get over it better. But you do need to get over it. she has a new life and you need to concentrate on yours. good luck
2007-09-26 14:26:50 · answer #7 · answered by youcandoit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy? If she's married and all that, you've got nothing to worry about. Don't let one woman interfere with your life.
2007-09-26 14:24:30 · answer #8 · answered by Cindy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
after 3 years, i still hate her. she destroyed my marriage, and i still have dreams of her, something unresolved that's still in our subconscious and u will be angry for a long time. but now she is married, and u did not loose the man u loved, so u need to put the energy in making your marriage work, not giving this home wrecker power over u. she tried to destroy your marriage but wasn't successful. what happened can't be undone but what u do have control over is your future, and u did not loose him to her, so put her where she belongs, in the past. don't live in the past, its over with, and your destiny will be controlled by how u handle all this, have a little self confidence and self esteem, he chose u in the end not her. its unfortunate it happened but it did. u really have alot to be thankful for here, could have just as easily gone the other way and u would really have something to grieve than. good luck.
2007-09-26 14:41:44 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jelousy. You should consider some therapy. It's not like your husband hung on to her pictures.
2007-09-26 17:14:32 · answer #10 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋