My ex bf...when we were together was supposedly depressed and wanted to kill himself, come to find out he got a one nightstand pregnant before we met. He only wanted to talk to me, said he trusted me. Well...when I helped him come to terms with it. He left me to be with the mother of his child, and I found out while I was in the hospital. He didnt even care that I was ill, he told me never to call him again. This is what I got for being there for him. Please tell me and help me understand,...so I have every right to call him and tell him what a piece of **** he is??/ Because I did ...amongst other things I said. I helped him meet his daughter and helped him with suicide and I got huge slap in the face. Mind you, him and the other one are no longer together, but I hate him sooo much for what he did to me. He messed with my mind with the suicide threats that I had to see a therapist. I feel he is an ungrateful sob, is it wrong to feel this way??
2007-09-26 11:06:55 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Also, what would be he best way to handle him and the situation altogether?
2007-09-26 11:08:01 · update #1
There is nothing that you should do to him. Walk away with your head held high knowing that you did what you could for the man.
It's called Karma...and everything that he did to you will come back to him. You need to do nothing.
2007-09-26 11:11:56 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hi...
The guy did you wrong, that's for sure.
Sometimes people come along and put on a really GREAT ACT and pretend to feel a certain way for us, when they don't. It's not fair, it's not right, but some people treat everyone like crap...
We are taking a gamble every time we get into a relationship, and even a friendship... next time, don't be so giving... take your time getting to know the person... let them find their own kids and solve their own problems...
and are you surprised the ex bf and the other girl are no longer together?? I'm not.
Ignore him is the best thing you can do.. take time to heal and adjust.... i hope you feel better, too.
2007-09-26 11:12:52 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you are always entitled to your feelings, however, if you rely on them in every case, they can lead you to react negatively and I believe this is the case. When you were there for him, you did a great thing. You even influenced him to do the right thing by being with the mother for the birth of his child. By just doing that, goodness will come back to you.
In these feelings, you should be proud of yourself. However,
when dealing with a person who feels so low, you are always taking a chance that he is dealing with very serious and tumultuous circumstances. He may not wish to deal with anything but what is troubling his life. Do not get offended and wish to harm or undo the good you did by counseling and being there for your exbf. You should hold strong in your own self knowing that you are a very kind and mature person. Please do NOT undo the good by condemning him. He should owe you nothing as the good you did for him should be enough for you. Do not call him and blast him with your feelings. Remember, he owes you nothing, but he did take your advice. We all should be so lucky as to have a friend to be there as you were! God Bless You in your own illness and in your kindness to your ex!
2007-09-26 11:21:30 · answer #3 · answered by PZ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to handle the situation is to get over him and get on with your life. He may be ungrateful, but you were the one who chose him as your mate. Accept your share of the blame and move on. You have control over how other people treat you; you control whom you let into your life, whom you get close to. Learn to choose wiser. Pain can be a great teacher; get all you can from the lesson, and strive to do better next time. Good luck. This guy doesn't deserve a minute of your time.
2007-09-26 11:20:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Another good woman messed up by an idiot. Honey - you are a giver - you helped him and he turned around and hit you right between the eyes. Don't be angry with yourself for loving and helping - you did good. He is the jerk - a taker and always will be. Chalk it up to experience and don't let it eat you alive and don't do it again. Learn to give and take care of yourself and then you will meet a good man. By the way - he will get his - they always do.
2007-09-26 11:16:47 · answer #5 · answered by Babycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The longer you obsess on it and pay attention to him and call him and wonder about him, the more control he has over you, and KNOWS he has control over you.
Prove to him and to yourself he has no control over you by dropping it, never calling him again, no more emails, no more late night calls to swear, no drunk dialing, nothing. You'll never feel vindicated on that he got his just rewards for being an asshole.
Stop. End it.
Or keep giving him complete power over your very thoughts.
Soon he'll be using as a booty call and don't deny it - you've already thought about that.
2007-09-26 11:15:02 · answer #6 · answered by filthy_crumb 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Best way is to totally ignore him and go on with your life. You are better off without this man and you should be glad you found out before you were the one pregnant or wed to him. He already knows what he is like. Get on with your life and live it to the fullest.
2007-09-26 11:12:41 · answer #7 · answered by pussycat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are so lucky not to be with that kind of looser thank God and continue with your life. Do not worry about why he did what he did it was he who was wrong not you. you did your best and he was not worth enough to be thankful people like that is like a heavy rock on your shoulders through it and go on ,your life is gonna be better
2007-09-26 11:46:55 · answer #8 · answered by sambabe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, you gave him gifts--your time and energy. However, since they were gifts, don't be an Indian giver and expect to be paid back. You made and investment and it didn't pay off. Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose so let it go.
2007-09-26 11:16:51 · answer #9 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
omd im so sorry, thats a man for ya.....ugggh hate them all if he evr contacts you please dont let him back in your life if you still have feelings for him be strong ok he is obviously like a lunatic ewwwww you can do better and keep your head up its okay to feel like that my ex used me left me a month before our wedding and just did mad crap to me and im still not over it but im doing way better its been a yrand im still not myself but i wont go back to him in a million yrs i desreve much better
2007-09-26 11:14:48 · answer #10 · answered by Liana P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋