She has told me that she has had lesbian affairs in the past. I know she still does, she admited to me that her and her best friend are more than just friends. She claims she loves me more than anything, but every now and then she gets a craving for a woman's soft touch. I guess I understand to a certain amount, if I was a woman I would definately be gay and her friend is a 10++. However, I am at conflict with the whole situation. I am a open minded person but was raised not to accept this sort of behaivior. I love my wife vut is it time to move on?
We don't have children.
2007-09-24 08:05:44 · 45 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What sort of agreement did you make before you wed? Was monogamy one of the terms? If so, she's violated the pact and crushed your trust in her.
Hardly matters what you call her -- gay, bi-, whatever; the fact is she's not a very honorable person. Your conflicted feelings are entirely appropriate in light of her behavior.
Glad to know you're childless. Keep it that way with her.
Luck to you.
2007-09-24 08:15:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
If she is seeing another person she is cheating on you, whether it is a man or a woman. This a decision that you will have to make but, if it were me I would not stay with someone who was not 100% committed to our relationship (and if she is seeing some one else then she isn't). If you are intent on saving your marriage then talk to your wife/see a counselor... but I am a firm believe of the old saying "once a cheater always a cheater." Ultimately, you must make the decision to stay with her and risk her continuous cheating or to leave her and pursure happiness with someone who loves you and only you.
As for whether or not she is a lesbian- if she loves you and craves the touch of another woman I would say she is bisexual.
Good luck with everything.
2007-09-24 08:16:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
i am sorry to hear of your situation. i believe that if she is a lesbian she may be wanting a woman more than whe will admit to. if she is bi, then maybe you have something to work with. but if she is married to you, and still has affairs, that right there is a total sign off not even fidelity. if you are married you are married to that person, not an affair or fling. even if she was having an affair with a man, its still an affair its still cheating and it is still wrong. if she wants to sleep around and not be connected why is she married and married to you? you dont have to see to have it spelled out to you! do what you must. i am very sorry to hear this. especially since you love her. love is not a easy thing to seperate from. but if its not returned....buddy, you know what you have to do, i just hope it is not as painful to do now than later. good luck. my heart goes out to you....xoxox
2007-09-24 08:19:40 · answer #3 · answered by ing3r im m3 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
your relationship is going to become a love triangle and not exactly a healthy environment to bring a child in I'd say.
So, if you can leave now, you'd better do it.
You'd regret it all your life if you were to have a child and leave it with his mum in such circumstances; but it'd be even worse if you had to stay for the sake of the child while you'd be hating your wife.
So, my conclusion is, to leave now.
She did tell you to give her credit, only you only heard what you wanted to.
She's bi, and it doesn't go away!
2007-09-24 08:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by Kc 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
That's up to you. Can you handle a relationship of three instead of 2? What if in a few years she decides she just wants to be with a woman and not a man? You might feel like you wasted a lot of your life trying to make her happy.
2007-09-24 08:13:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
I say, if she gets a girlfriend, then so do you. You love her dearly right? So in her eyes, it shouldn't be a problem if you get a craving for another woman's soft touch, you should get to act on it too.
p.s. she is bi-sexual, not lesbian. Lesbian would mean she exclusively likes girls.
2007-09-24 08:25:41 · answer #6 · answered by SweetGGirl 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Cheating is cheating and if she will cheat with a woman she will cheat with another man! Its only a matter of time! I think you need to move on and let her and her gf have what they want. If you don't get out now she may end up leaving you for another woman all together! Unless you are open to swinging! Then you could get your cake and eat it too...However I DO NOT suggest this!
2007-09-24 08:13:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
You wife love you very much while she had lesbian with a woman.My friend who was from sugarmommymeet.com montioned to me that you wife maybe has a kind of psychological trouble.You should go to ask a doctor.
2007-09-26 01:04:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer that question. But it sounds more like she is bi than gay. Tell her it's OK to have the affairs, but she should have them at home with you watching. Eliminate the lying, and everyone is fine. The truth and being open will improve your relationship.
2007-09-24 08:14:37 · answer #9 · answered by Kelli 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yes, tell her it is over and she can have all the women she wants when you get a divorce if she doesn't end this affair. You said it yourself, you were brought up to not exept that. When she said I Do to you she took you for who you are, and you did the same. Her friend did not say the vows with you did she?!
2007-09-24 08:13:36 · answer #10 · answered by girlygirlprincessbritt 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋