heterosexual males? If so, what does this say about how much men value women - regardless of their sexuality - as *human beings*? Why do I rarely hear women referring to gay males with such a hostile and dismissive attitude?
2007-09-24 07:56:45 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
He is controlled by his hormones and if he can't have sex with a woman, then she is "useless" to him.
This man is an imbecile and not worth another second of your thoughts. It isn't that he doesn't value women as people or even thinks about it beyond his d*ck. He IS his penis.
Sadly, testosterone is a pretty powerful hormone and there are a lot of men who are ruled by their hormones.
It is why I find it funny everytime a man refers to a woman's hormones. We have NOTHING on someone who has that chemical in such abundance in their bodies.
I like the fact that I can get up, think clearly, go about my business and only think of sex when I want to think of it. I am in control of my mind.
I wouldn't delve too deeply into this fella's words because I can tell you HE isn't delving too deeply.
Dismiss him.
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2007-09-24 09:20:29 · answer #1 · answered by KD 5 · 4⤊ 4⤋
It may have been an issue of context. A friend of mine took a girl out several times, he thought they were dates, she thought they were just "hanging out" before he found out that she is a lesbian. There were some things said in anger that I know do not reflect his general attitude of women, he felt taken advantage of.
I don't think that's a common view among most men. At least, none of the ones I know. But I can, to a certain extent, understand where people who have these feeling are coming from. When I was in college I was getting a Liberal Arts degree. I would frequently express the idea that dating or even being friends with someone from the "hard sciences" was a "waste of my time". It didn't mean that I don't value them as human beings or for the advancements they will make in society, but that we think too differently and have so little in common that trying to form a relationship would be painful and probably pointless, so why try. I don't think it is necessarily (although in some cases it might be) valuing someone based on their sexuality so much as their perceived ideology. People want friends and acquaintances which view the world in the same relative terms that they do, it makes for smooth running instead of a constant need to defend beliefs and thoughts.
2007-09-24 16:08:29 · answer #2 · answered by lkydragn 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
On the contrary, even though I was from another time. A time when feminine lesbians stayed in the closet and some not only never came out but lived in denial.
I knew a very openly gay guy, who introduced me to the gay girls. That was an eye opening year for me. Many were my friends , even better than guys friends , letting me in on high school secret crushes. In my youth , I had never considered girls as friends, just conquest, well 40 years later , I am still in contact with two. We were the best of friends. We still giggle over remember whens,
The best time I ever spent. Loved Carol at parties she would always tip me off to interested girls. I just didn't get it myself. She was never wrong. she was also my dance partner.
2007-09-24 16:44:23 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Being bisexual, and usually assumed to be heterosexual because I look very feminine, I've heard a lot of nasty things said about both gay men and lesbians, by not just heterosexuals, but by other gay men, lesbians and bisexuals. I've met gay men who hate women, lesbians who hate men, just like I've met straight men and women who hate each other. (The least number of people I've met are bisexual, so I'll assume that we hate equally!) Most of these people are not feminists, lol.
Since I live in the south and in baptist country, I've heard plenty of nasty things about gay men and women, from both heterosexual men and women. Prejudice knows no bounds.
2007-09-24 23:55:24 · answer #4 · answered by edith clarke 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For one thing, gay men love being around straight women because they have a lot in common. And straight women think its fun to hang out with the gay lads because they never have to worry about getting hit on. I've not known a lot of lesbians who think its a hoot to hang out with straight men. So there's not a lot of inviting going either way. As far as what it says about how much some men value women as human beings - do you really have to ask?
2007-09-24 17:18:18 · answer #5 · answered by c'mon, cliffy 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If a guy is only interested in women for relationships, as opposed to friendships, then his statement is correct. I don't see his view as being hostile or dismissive, but I do believe he is cutting himself short of having a full life - if he does't regard the possibility of friendships with women, lesbian or not...
2007-09-24 15:05:08 · answer #6 · answered by Super Ruper 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Actually I've heard women say something along the lines of, "What a waste." quite a bit when it comes to gay men. Especially if he's "hot"
I can relate to the statement. Most of the women I know are completely uninteresting from a friendship viewpoint. They just don't have nearly enough in common with me.
On the other hand, having only some things in common can bring a nice dynamic into a romantic relationship.
For most lesbians, I'd say the same. Because most people are a waste of time in general due to their inherent stupidity. (That doesn't apply to any of you, of course)
2007-09-24 15:14:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
I am a lesbian but I still don't see why anyone can hate anyone for finding love. Love is the most beautiful thing. Gay men are also SO adorable. I feel no hostility to anyone, for their sexuality or for their anger towards me for being who I am. I just be me. If people don't like it sorry for them but I am not going to change who I am to please anyone else I am going to please myself in the arms of the woman I love. Shes good to me loves my kids and my crazy family, What others think has no meaning in my heart like she does. Their words may hurt but I get over it because losing her would hurt more then the words they throw at me. I have a saying I tell my brother that doesn't agree with my life and is big in Church I use it on him when he trys to tell me that god doesn't agree with what I am doing. GOD SAYS DO NOT JUDGE FOR THERE IS ONLY ONE JUDGE, HIM, GOD, THE MASTER, THE CREATOR OF ALL BEINGS. So don't hate me for loving a person that makes me happy. Don't hate at all just know that I am happy and If theres a problem with that then me and god will talk about when I get there.
2007-09-24 15:12:23 · answer #8 · answered by tammynashton 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're right. This is a foolish and dismissive remark for any male (straight or gay) to make. Clearly he is only revealing his contempt for women in general. I would say a man who could make this statement is, himself, a "waste of time."
2007-09-26 11:28:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not a common view.
If you had been paying to popular culture (which you evidently haven't), you'd know that men stereotypically *like* lesbians and lesbian sexual activity. They don't see them as a "waste of time".
Speaking for myself, I never adhered to this stereotype of finding a fascination of lesbian sexual acts. It does nothing for me.
I treat lesbians and everyone the same, unless they are a lesbian misandrist and/or a lesbian feminist. Being a feminist that just happens to be a lesbian is one thing, but being a feminist BECAUSE you're lesbian signifies a lesbian agenda behind your anti-male rhetoric.
But wait, you talked to a man in person and not on the internet? You being a man-hater, how did that go about? You must've been very hostile to him not just for being a man, but for being a man that made statements that you view as being "anti-lesbian".
And your comment that many women don't have negative views on gay men is completely false. There are plenty of homophobic women that giggle about gay men and make negative comments about gay men. Remember that video of Chris Crocker on YouTube crying about Britney Spears? There were plenty of video responses of women making fun of him, calling him a f@g, and a "queer". There are women that only date "masculine" and "macho" "bad boys", and will openly state that they don't date effeminate or androgynous men because "they don't date f@gs". Perhaps you feminists will one day be able to look at both sides of the issues, instead of being so femi-centric and ethnocentric.
2007-09-24 17:19:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
This sounds like one guy's opinion. I don't think you generalize anything about men from this one idiot's opinion. Lots of men I know have really good relationships with lesbians. I mean, my partner's bestfriend since childhood is a lesbian and they talk about relationships and whatnot together...
The guy who said is just a tool.
2007-09-24 15:21:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋