English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

Is this falling in love think USUALLY and I dont mean ALWAYS but just usually a mutual feeling? I mean if a guy is falling for a girl, is it usually the case that she also is falling for him? There must be a vibe/chemistry before someone starts having the feelings right? Personal experiences really appreciated!!

2007-09-24 06:37:29 · 5 answers · asked by profe 1 in Social Science Psychology

5 answers

Such a good question...I asked it myself a few years ago and did some (internet) research to try to answer it. If I recall, my final decision, based on the reading I did was that, yes, it usually is. Unfortunately, based on the experience I was having at the time, the answer turned out to be, "but not this time!"

I fell in love with someone I had been dating for a couple of months and told him so. He told me, just days later, that he was getting together with a "friend", reassured me that it was not a date (even though I was fine if it was). He then told me, after the "date that was not a date" that he fell in love with her on this very first "date". It actually seemed to me, at the time, that he was lying about the whole thing, that he was just freaking out (this love thing is happening too fast) because it just didn't make sense that this person was not also falling in love with me, because of course it happens mutually. Objectively, all the signs WERE there. I was able, later, to actually confirm that he did get together with this person and so it must have been real, but it REALLY didn't make sense to me at the time, on an internal, intuitive, this-is-the-way-the-world-works level. Falling in love is not rational, but is based on biology, chemistry, reactions to each other in the brain. I thought, I should KNOW, not on an intellectual level but on a physical, human survival-type level, when it is happening and when it isn't. It felt like my humanness had gone haywire. My guess is, the feelings were there, and intelletually, he decided this other person was a better match for him (he and she had kids, I don't; he and she were both runners, I am not; she was more attractive than me; she had horses, who can compete with that!)

I wish I could find some of the info I had come across on-line. I thought I had saved it, but not finding it. It was really interesting.

Good luck and good love! :-)

btw, I should clarify my conceptualization of "falling in love". It is very different than "loving". "Falling in love", to me, is a completely emotional/physical reaction that requires no effort, no action. It is basically the infatuation, lust, connection stuff, though a little more complex and complicated than just "I want to fu*k you". "Loving" is the "real-deal" and involves all that stuff we do to make relationships actually work.

2007-09-24 07:07:22 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa 1 · 0 0

1

2016-05-07 18:21:26 · answer #2 · answered by Randall 3 · 0 0

Lust is a lot more likely to be mutual than love... Love takes work and time.. and while true love I would say is usually mutual.. what people consider love (some state of infatuation I don't have a good word for) is more one sided.

2007-09-24 06:51:07 · answer #3 · answered by pip 7 · 0 0

It might be mutual most times but more often than not one or both persons is afraid of it and "run away".

2007-09-24 07:24:26 · answer #4 · answered by b 4 · 0 0

I reckon you will not prefer to take heed to a male's point of view, yet i'm a undies-fetishist myself and that i placed on g-strings/thongs each and every of the time. i've got been a thonging for extra effective than 6 years. and that i continuously placed on woman thongs/strings as they have the form of huge decision and attainable in form of cloth in comparison to male ones. that's the form of vast flip on for me on each and every occasion I spot g-string/thong traces below even though the girls each and every person is donning on the mall, wellness club,and so forth. I additionally actively test to work out if i will spot undies traces. I additionally am a closet-exhibitionist myself and placed on my stuff in a fashion human beings would spot what i'm donning below. yet i do now not do it to entice women human beings in any respect. i comprehend you wanted women' concept in this, yet my 2 cents.

2017-01-02 15:12:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

fedest.com, questions and answers