will i learn to live without him?

Question

been with this guy 4 21years, and have kids and been married for 16yrs, i think i still luv him or do i? he is my security,i have the nice house and cars, we both worked 4, sometimes he is in2 me and other times he his caught up in other things, ive cheated on him more then once he never foundout, i keep trying 2 make things work and stop the cheating but, know i found some1 else who makes me feel alive again, but he is married also and has kids also, im stuck in 2 worlds what should i do and please be honest. afraid to move on!!!

Answer 1

I think you need to get some counseling. The grass is not always greener on the other side. You have a husband he has a wife. Don't destroy to families for lust. I think you got you have lost yourself somewhere along the way and need to find the person you where. Your husband has been good to you and gave you a good life. You said sometimes he is into you sometimes he is in to other things that's called life.

Answer 2

Since you keep asking this question 4 times over and have gotten many honest answers. We don't know if you love your husband or not. The only thing I see here is that you don't know what to do because you want security. Not once have you mentioned any pain you may be causing onto others in this situation and do not be so sure that this man you are having an affair with loves you. First off, you being on Yahoo and meeting other men means you already have your answer, you guys had sex and fell in love. I think you are being extremely immature and keep posting the same question until someone gives you the answer you want. You are afraid to move on to what? I am not trying to hurt you but you suddenly up and make a profile on Friday and post the same question. Just because this other man says he loves you and is saving money for you two to be together could just be his way of leading you on, you are obviously not very concerned about someone you have only know 6 months telling you the truth. You must be two peas in a pod. I doubt that he is going to be leaving his wife and children for you and if this is what he has told you then why are you still there and not with him? You obviously are not trying to make things work with your husband and stop the cheating because you are still doing it and have not taken the proper steps on your marriage such as counseling, being honest, and continuing a relationship with a man who hasn't told his wife and kids about you.

Answer 3

Cheating is never the answer. Of course its exciting now but you both are married with kids! That's horrible think about your kids and the fact that you can't let go of your husband should tell you something. The new guy is fun for now but you need to work on your marriage.and stop taking the coward's way out by cheating!!!! That's what marriage is about its hard work!

Answer 4

Well, how old are the kids? You have a responsibility to them and as an adult should have the integrity to live up to that responsibility. Clean up your act and put more effort into the marriage, a lot of times your disinterest can become self-sustaining, as in once you decide you're going to look elsewhere, you subconsciously care less and less about the marriage.

It's better to get divorced than to cheat. At least then you're not degrading your integrity by living a lie.

Answer 5

You want your cake and to eat it too. Its been that way for you all along and so far you've avoided detection. However never think for a moment that this other guy is someone to leave your present husband over.
If you can't keep things status quo then end the dilly-dallying around and stay home with hubby.
naturally if you continue to have the affair know that sooner or later thiere's always the possibility that one of you will be exposed...thereby selling out the other.

Answer 6

I do not want to sound judgemental, because we all have temptations, but you made a vow when you married your husband. It sounds like you get along pretty well but need to prioritize your lives around each other, not houses and cars. If you spend time doing fun things and being alone sometimes, you may find that spark again between you.

You risk not only ruining your own life but the other guy's if you get involved, as tempting as it is. My advice is don't do it, and work on what you have.

Answer 7

I want to ask you a couple questions. What would happen if your husband found out about your affairs? If he knew and accepted the fact you were unfaithful would you then stop cheating?

I think you should "come clean" with him. I think you should get as honest with him, and require him to get totally honest with you too.

This action will change things. It could make things worst or maybe make things better. Either way you will have an answer to your question.

Answer 8

Well cheating is the never the answer. I mean you have what you need right at home, be thankful and grateful for that. Do you actually think that the other guy is going to leave his wife for you, probably not? if you will invest more in your marriage instead of this adulteress affair then you will feel complete, instead of alive. God Bless you on your decision.

Answer 9

Marriage means YOU ARE WHO I CHOSE TO GET BORED WITH. Seriously, you have cheated twice, so you already know that that new feeling wears OFF with the one you are cheating with. A man who cheats with you only wants to borrow you for a while, then give you back. Your husband wants to KEEP you forever. so you tell me, which is the better man?
If you keep this up, one day you will lose your husband. Maybe HE will get tired of this, or he will find someone who can love him right, and then YOU will be the one out in the cold. Grow up, girlfriend.

Answer 10

see what karma does? it always catches u and its sad that even though u dont feel sorry for the affair that u had, u still want ur hubby back.

ur NEVER stuck! u choose to be there, now why are u messing with someone else's family? honey u know ur going down the wrong path, do u really need to take someone else with u?

let ur hubby be........ let him go! as for u i really hope u come to ur senses, this other guy is going to play u the same way that u played ur hubby.