My b/f of 3.5 years started a fight with me yesterday about the stupidest thing(long story). Anyways, one thing led to another and I asked him if he really loved me. He always told me he did, but then did things to make me feel like he didn't. He asked my why I wanted to know if he loved me. I told him it was a yes or no answer and he told me NO! I have given this man my heart and come to find out he lied to me and doesn't really love me. We live together and I am so mad, I just want to leave, but I really do love him! I just need to know if anyone else has been in this situation and did you continue or leave. I am already looking for places to go as I live in his home. I am just looking for some comfort. Please no mean attacks. I am already emotional. Thanks to all who respond!
2007-09-24 03:29:37 · 12 answers · asked by Independence Baby - 7/4/09 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I suspect the 'no' was the feeling of the moment. I don't believe that anyone lives with another person of the opposite sex for that amount of time and doesn't love or care about that person.
So i'd say it was a 'knee-jerk' response to your demands for an answer. Problem is that once it falls from your mouth there's no taking stuff back. Let him cool down and see what happens. Oh...you cool down too. Part of being in love with someone is being able to comprimise. Once that fails then the relationship is finished.
2007-09-24 03:56:00 · answer #1 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No matter how angry he got he should have never said he didn't love you. That's just a bag of tricks a guy can pull to upset you even more, even when he didn't mean it. I couldn't see any man saying that out of spite but something contributed to his anger to make him do so. I couldn't possibly think that he doesn't love you and he lives with you and you all have been together for 3.5 years? I think there is something there but he refuses to give in and admit it. Only talking will help. Feel better....
2007-09-24 10:43:11 · answer #2 · answered by heathermichelle9 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you had to find out that your boyfriend doesn't love you....Are you sure it was not just the anger in him talking? If he was honest and doesn't love you..then you are doing the right thing by leaving him...one sided relationships don't usually work. I left my first husband...because I did love him...but wasn't in love with him.. I thought it was unfair to him to love me so much when I couldn't return that love...There was far more many things that led to the demise of our marriage....so it wasn't only about not being in love with him. Do not waste time by staying in this relationship because you love him.....you should get out and you will eventually find someone that will love you! Best of luck!
2007-09-24 10:39:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Getting your heart broken is obviously a hard situation to be in. Feelings of betrayal and sadness take over us and makes us confused and lonely. The one thing you have to keep in mind is your well being. Everything you say and do to him can affect your well being so be careful with every decision you make. Ask yourself the question you posted. Would you stay with a person who already opened up to you and admitted he doesn't love you? Keep the people who make you feel better close to you, surround yourself with them and allow yourself to feel better. Be strong. Best of luck!
2007-09-24 10:42:29 · answer #4 · answered by onlinetherapist.com 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did he tell you no because he was still mad and trying to be hurtful? If so perhaps he does love you. However you shouldn't just assume such - you need to find out. If he doesn't love you then you should probably move on. You deserve to be loved, and can find someone better (if he has in fact been lying to you the whole time).
2007-09-24 10:57:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, do you believe in " fate " ? If yes, then lets it take its toll. Also, use your 3.5 years feeling just this time, to judge whether you want this relationship : A Go or Stay ? Best wishes.
2007-09-24 10:57:37 · answer #6 · answered by Capger 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just because he 'started a fight' with you doesn't mean you needed to participate.
There are more issues here than whether or not he loves you.
2007-09-24 10:36:36 · answer #7 · answered by hexeliebe 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
im sorry, but you cant make somebody feel something they dont, and if you love him then you have to let him go, because that is what he wants
2007-09-24 10:36:39 · answer #8 · answered by James 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Listen to kesha cole's Song ..........
I hope you finaly get that he is where he wanna be ....
If he dont wana love you the right way ,than he aint gonna...
If he dont tread you the way he should ,than let it go....
If he aint love you the way he should,than let it go .....
Please take the advice honey and gogogogogog....
2007-09-24 10:49:02 · answer #9 · answered by siggi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you move and and don't see him again, in about 6 months you will have trouble remembering what he looked like.True !
It does not take too long to get over somebody.
2007-09-24 10:40:36 · answer #10 · answered by brian777999 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋