I have this friend. He is lucky with women. He is in a relationship and hes happy. He has everything. I can't stand it anymore. Im alone, lonely and feel hopeless. Whenever I hear about his luck I feel a rage build up inside me. I talk about him behind his back. I just want him to be as unhappy as I am. Why do I feel this way?
2007-09-21 16:01:03 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Wait a minute - how really lucky is he?
You are comparing yourself unfavorably to someone else, and in this instance you will always come up short.
True love and happiness is not just about luck. It's not about picking just anybody and having what looks like the "perfect" setup.
Let me tell you, I have seen so many "perfect" setups fall apart time and time again because what looks perfect usually never is perfect in reality.
So what if he is lucky in love? Love is not about luck. Love is about really caring for another person, everything about the, not just how they look or how they look with you. If that were true, Hollywood marriages would last a lot longer!
True love is embodied in the kind of people who marry for love and stick together through thick and thin because they want to be with each other. True love is found in the likes of a young man who married his girlfriend even after she was in a horrendous accident that scarred her for life. True love is found in the woman who stayed married to and supported Christopher Reeve even after his accident that caused him to be a quadriplegic. True love is found in the Bible where Jacob continued to work a total of 14 years to marry his love Rachel even after he had been given her sister in marriage and she bore him sons.
True love is moving to the shelter of a picnic table in a rainstorm in the desert and snuggling and giggling at the same time.True love follows the precious baby from the c-section to the nurse's station, offers precious baby her first bottle and wraps her up in her first diaper and follows her to the nursery and watches over her so tired mommy can sleep.
True love sticks around when wife is grumpy from PMS, when wife is throwing up from the flu, cleans up the mess when precious daughter throws up at 3AM, and even washes the dishes sometimes.
True love cares whether or not she comes home at night. True love is interested when she comes home with 3 truckloads of junk and helps clean and fix it all up for a yard sale (made $300 bucks off that junk, by the way)
Let your friend go. Quit hating him. Rip the chip off you shoulder and quit bad-mouthing him. There are other people in the world - to the tune of more than a billion. I think the odds of you finding a decent girl out of a billion in the world are pretty good.
2007-09-21 16:26:14 · answer #1 · answered by enn 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, jealousy. Learn to love yourself first, then you can love others. As you change your outlook, others will be drawn to you. If you send out negatives into the universe, that is what you will get in return.Wanting him to be as unhappy as you are is just counterproductive. And he is probably not as lucky as you think he is. I would wager he puts time and effort into who he is and accepting himself. Others react to that. As a woman I can tell you- looks and money don't matter, confidence- not conceit- caring about people and knowing how to love and not be superficial are what will help you win in love and life.
2007-09-21 16:18:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like Jealousy. Be part from him, and work on yourself. Socialize more and get to know people. Try not to get angry as you are building negative energy and thats what (at least what i think) will keep you down. Be powerful, try to look happy. And be nice.
2007-09-21 16:07:04 · answer #3 · answered by Sun And Sky 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋