I have really bad anxiety. I was trying to help this woman that was in an abusive relationship. Talked to her after work at a coffee shop a few times. Mostly just listened ( what I do best{listen})and warned her that he would escalate with the abuse. Had the biggest urge to kiss her then any girl before( Didn't thankfully) Now she wants to rebound on me and one day called me 3 times. Phone calls have stopped finally but has e-mailed me almost every day once if not twice. I have no responded to a single one this week. My friends say I should just use her. (Not that type of guy) for you know what. All I wanted to do is help now I can't stand her. She is just totally love drunk and just wants to rebound with me and jump right into a relationship. I not getting my heart ripped out again. No rebound relationships. So what do I do ignore her totally? I do see her everyonce in awhile at work. I really wish I never expressed myself with her. I only did it to see if I could to be honest.
2007-09-21 15:39:19 · 5 answers · asked by Vin 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Sounds like this girl was in trouble...you were attracted to her...and now the feeling is more than mutual. So ask yourself, what was your initial reason for lending a sympathetic ear? Were you really just trying to be a good friend, or were you hoping for more?? I find it odd that you jumped from being attracted to her to "I can't stand her" so quickly. Too bad for her. That said, you don't really owe her anything. But it would be kinda jerky to just wimp out on her at this point. If you really have no feelings for her, then tell her you want to be her friend, not her lover. And keep that sympathetic ear open. On the otherhand, rebound relationships are not always the worst thing on earth. My cousin jumped into one after getting dumped by her fiance whom she dated since junior high. She married the rebound a year later, and they have been married for 15 years. Happier with him than she ever was with the first guy. And FYI - What makes you think a non-rebound relationship will be any easier on your heart? You have to LIVE life, and that means getting hurt sometimes. It just makes you appreciate it when it finally happens for good all the more. :)
2007-09-21 15:52:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you don't want a relationship right now and that you want to see other people and that she should do the same. Using her is a baaaad idea! If you can't tell her, write her a e-mail explaining how you feel. You don't have to be mean to her, just move on and encourage her to move on and encourage her to stay out of a relationship with anyone else for a while and figure out what is best for her, perhaps she could use some counseling.
2007-09-21 15:50:11 · answer #2 · answered by LaptopJesus 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are either going to have to TOTALLY ignore her, I mean no hi's or bye's nothing. Or you will have to tell her that you arent interested in a relationship with her. She will be confused either way but I would say that if you chose the ignoring (which I think you will :)) just make sure you dont say one word, nothing at all so you dont confuse her even more!! good luck
2007-09-21 15:48:59 · answer #3 · answered by Sherie D 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Just explain,,you just want to be friends
2007-09-21 15:47:59 · answer #4 · answered by 4 strings 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nitro Girls
2016-05-20 06:57:36 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋