When you know the other person doesn't love you anymore, why do you stay in that relationship? Is it because you think you can win them over? I think once the love is gone, it's gone. They might still have feelings for you based on all the shared history, but I really think the *love* is gone for good.
2007-09-21 15:36:51 · 11 answers · asked by Fluffster1 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
finances, children, habit, fear of the unknown, religious views, low self-esteem if they think they don't deserve better, companionship...there are many reasons, not all of them bad ones. just because the love is gone doesn't mean it's a bad relationship, and sometimes staying together just makes more sense than leaving.
2007-09-21 15:50:40 · answer #1 · answered by sleepycatz1972 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hollywood has made Love out to be an euphoric condition where each person is perfect in the other one's eyes. Usually lust and infatuation is really what motivates a person to seek more information which may lead to a feeling of love. They choose to look past their faults. After several years together couples realize their spouse isn't perfect. The bills, the kids, the jobs, oh you know "real life" what you didn't have to deal with in the beginning bites you in the butt. Now, couples can choose to deal with these things together and a love beyond all will form. The flip side is it is easier when the times get rough to find attraction to someone that isn't associated with these stresses. The grass is greener syndrome or hollywood syndrome, "I love them, but I'm not "in love" any more. Really they just want to escape their real life. This is how affairs start. Thinking that the excitement will drowned out all the other stresses in their life. Love has to be preserved and watered. Too many times it is just put on the back burner because of too many other commitments. If people would put their marriage first, the love would not only survive but be unbelieveable. The love is usually still there just in hybernation and yes it can rebloom with communication and realization of what brought you together in the first place. If you are the other woman, you are probably an escape from his "real life". If not, leave him alone, and tell him to come see you once the ink is dried on his divorce.
2007-09-21 23:23:22 · answer #2 · answered by Nicole 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is so expensive....don't really want to go through the whole thing all over....left past marraiges when the love was gone and seems to always end up at this point......those who have spent decades together say marraiges go through some pretty empty and dark spells and if you can burn through it....it's worth it once you reach the other side.
I have no desire to "win" mine back. It's my home so I'm not able to leave....he won't.....and I don't have the money to go through the dramatics of having him physically thrown out. He doesn't work......things are uneventful like 2 ships passing in the night. No hostility....just occational superficial conversations.
Personally.....I'm done with men so it's not like I feel I'm kept from something. And I'm not holding him back if that's what he wants.
Getting too old to think my prince and happy ever after was ever to be a part of my life so it is what it is for now. I've started to beleive maybe I had too high of expectations for marraige and maybe this is all there is. All I know is it feels good to not have to constantly worry about being "good enough" to keep a guy and all the rest.....keep them interested....coz every guy I ever ended up with never put forth the same effort to keep things going. They seemed more interested in thinking about all the things and women they were missing out on.
It's not fun that's for sure......guess I'm too tired of fighting for it and too tired to fight against it.
2007-09-21 23:19:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what is true love anyway? most of the time it is not the love that ends it is the lack of communications or goals are so different that they lose touch of each other in this fast paced world. if given time together to remember what they had and spend time together out of their careers they may see they really do still love each other????
2007-09-21 22:52:54 · answer #4 · answered by studentcounselor 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People stay in marriages, because they vowed before God to stay together for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer until death do they part.
Love is a choice.
2007-09-21 22:49:11 · answer #5 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually when there are kids involved, people are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to stay in loveless marriages.
2007-09-21 22:44:11 · answer #6 · answered by Saia 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
some people stay for financial, emotional, or child related reasons. some people stay for all of those reasons. it not always that easy for people to just pack up and move.
would you believe that some people don't have anywhere to go?
2007-09-21 22:43:00 · answer #7 · answered by renamed 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There could be many reason. Money, lack of self-esteem, no where to go, feeling worthless, being scared, or just thinking things will change.
2007-09-21 22:46:20 · answer #8 · answered by tigerprincess_bee 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Financial security, for the kids. For most part they remain married for the kids or religion.
2007-09-21 22:45:51 · answer #9 · answered by Goodhead 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe its comfort, or out of habit.
every situation is different. there could be a million reasons.
financial reasons, kids, etc etc
2007-09-21 22:40:48 · answer #10 · answered by Brandi M. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋