It was a muntual agreed upon breackup and we made it as peaceful as can be. She just sold a house and says that she needs to pay other bills with it. She is going to give me $200 tomorrow and $100 a month and then said she will have it paid off bt February. What do you think of this?
2007-09-21 15:32:16 · 28 answers · asked by tony r 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
wow!! listen to all the girls saying that she gets to keep it!! sorry girls, but etiquette says that you return the ring if you both agree to call off the wedding! now if he dumped her, left her at the altar, ran around on her, whatever, then she can dispose of the ring as she sees fit. the giving and accepting of "the ring" is a promise of marriage, not a "trophy" to put in your war chest! and after the marriage is called off, why should you care if he sells it, pawns it, or recycles it? our diamond was returned by the previous owners for an upgrade to a larger stone, and let me tell you, it is one exquisite stone, used or not! diamonds are forever, not forever yours, no matter what.
2007-09-21 15:59:36 · answer #1 · answered by car dude 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not a gift and who ever said it was a gift doesn't understand property law. It is given on the condition of marriage. If she got married to you then it is hers, but before that happens, she is wearing your ring. I would personally want the ring back, but if you work out an agreement then that's ok if she pays for it. I have seen this a lot and most of the time the woman pays for a month or so and then runs. Watch out and be prepared with a lawyer and just so you know, most of the ones I have seen are exactly like yours and the relationship is discribed the same way.
I am editing this to remind all you ignorant women that keep saying the ring is hers and she is under no obligation that there is law that guides this type of event. Please don't make stupid, ignorant, misguiding posts to this poor guy.
2007-09-21 15:42:03 · answer #2 · answered by Eric G 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't think he left because you called the cops. I have been in that place before, and he will be extremely irritable, depressed, discouraged, angry... I can keep going. One thing that could be going through his head is that he can't even do suicide right. He's a failure there too. I think what you should do is talk to his friends and family, get their support. You need to get him to go to an ER. I was evaluated and it was decided that I didn't need to stay at the hospital, but I was referred to the Urgent Crisis Center. I went once a week until I passed what they call the crisis stage where I may harm myself or other. I actually got to see that same woman who I talked to in the ER. So he won't have to go indepth with multiple people and doctors. He is sick. You have to remember that. Don't be offended, don't be pissed at him. It's a good idea to postpone the wedding anyway if he's in this situation. All the added stress and nervousness won't help him at all and will likely push him over the edge. Talk to him. If he won't pick up the phone, text, email, write him a letter. Anything. Tell him that you love him, and you're scared. You want him to be happy, you want to help him be happy. Don't push the wedding subject. Let him know that would want to wait until he was well and safe again. You have to talk him into going to a doctor. If you can't, get a buddy to. If he can't, get his mom to. I don't know if it would do anygood, but you might be able to talk to the hospital. Tell them that he is suicidal, he's breaking off ties and relationships, and that he already attempted to kill himself. He needs you, even if it doesn't seem like it.
2016-05-20 06:55:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not listen to the people saying it was a gift. The engagement ring is actually like a contract between you and your fiance to get married. When the engagement was called off, the contract was broken. You are LEGALLY entitled to get the ring back. Now if you decide that you are okay with her giving you money then fine. Get something in WRITING from her stating she will pay you. Otherwise she is going to make a fool out of you. If she doesn't give it back, then take her to small claims court.
2007-09-21 16:39:43 · answer #4 · answered by alygirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO. get that ring or tell her you will be forced to take legal action. That engagement ring is NOT a gift. It's a symbol of marriage & since it was called off, she has to give the ring back to you. You will end up agreeing to a payment arrangement that she will not follow through with anymore one day. Then your screwed. What? GET THE RING BACK A.S.A.P. Tell her while you would love to help her, you got bills of your own (such as that bill you will be paying for the ring) Her bills are her problem. She needs to be a woman about it & be more responsible to pay for her bills herself & NOT use that ring as her back up. That is shady. What kinda woman is that? consider yourself lucky things happened the way they did.
2007-09-21 15:40:45 · answer #5 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Edit: website
I am a woman. I broke off an engagement. The ring was given back. It is not a gift to keep. It is a token/contract pending marriage, if marriage does not go through you do not keep the ring period. Married/divorced fine. I personally, believe even if you broke it off (if she were my daughter) I would advise her to still give it back.
He wanted it back ASAP. Also I did not want to kep or wear a ring of a man I did not love. To use it for bills-sorry you are not a loan broker. Are they bills she incured/responsible for due to broken engagement-bridal dress, caterer, florist? That is the only reason I could see to use it as $$
Good luck
http://engagementrings.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Engagement_Ring_Etiquette
2007-09-21 15:40:15 · answer #6 · answered by Woman in Red 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I think that the right thing for her to do would be to give the ring back to you. It doesn't belong to her anymore. What she's doing seems disrespectful and chances are, you probably won't get your money back. If she is in a financial position to were she needs to keep the ring you gave her (something that was meant to represent your future together) to pay bills, how is she going to come up with the money to pay you? I would be surprised if she does.
2007-09-21 15:44:31 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Normally if the girl breaks off the engagement, she is to return the ring to you. However for some reason she wants to keep the ring. You should allow her to keep the ring as long as she is paying you for it. I mean what do you plan on doing with it? You would not get the amount you paid for it at a pawn shop, and if you get engaged to someone else in the future, you do not want to use the same ring, so you should just get the money from her for what you spent on it.
2007-09-21 15:41:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
the ring is a promise and if it is broken by the girl then she should give the ring back. do you really want the ring it is just going to cause problems. if she is paying you back then just take the money. you have no use for the ring anyway, because you can't give it to your new girlfriend that wouldn't be right.
2007-09-21 15:41:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What exactly was "mutually agreed upon break up"? The break up or something about the ring...I am a little confused...It almost sounds that the breaking of the engagement was mutual....If that is the case....why do you want the ring back? If she did in fact break the engagement...it would be nice of her to give the ring back...but she is under no obligation to.
2007-09-21 15:51:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋