I'm referring to weight gain, illness, losing hair, skin disease, menopause, etc.
2007-09-21 03:35:15 · 19 answers · asked by m23boyz@ameritech.net 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
DO NOT make them your SPOUSE if you cannot accept better, worse, sickness, health, richer and poorer. Weight gain should be a concern more about health than looks. If you love your spouse you will help them be healthy, not sabotage their efforts. As for illness, losing hair, etc., read my first sentence. marriage is not for children or immature people. Just be boyfriend/girlfriend if you can't abide by the first sentence (I am not saying I am a dictator of marriage - those are the standard vows.)
2007-09-21 03:42:54 · answer #1 · answered by Teresa 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I think it does, whether it should or not.
I'll tell you my experience. I went through a period of great stress for a year and a half, and gained 40 pounds. My husband never said anything about the weight gain, but I would imagine it bothered him. He was very supportive about the stressful situation I was in.
I have now started dieting and working out, and I have lost 17 pounds so far. His reaction is - Wow, you are starting to look like yourself again! But really, I know that the weight gain bothered me far more than it bothered him.
Regarding skin disease - if it's treatable, and the spouse affected by it does not get treatment, I know that that will bother the other spouse no end.
Regarding hair loss, it's something that the other spouse gets used to, but it takes a little time.
That's my opinion.
2007-09-21 03:45:32 · answer #2 · answered by Tricia R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In an ideal world, NO. All the things beyond our control, such as illness, hair loss, skin disease, menopause, they should never have a bearing. Weight gain is usually the individual's fault, so some spouses get angry and find their heavier spouse less appealing because they feel they have let themselves go.
2007-09-21 03:41:06 · answer #3 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Yes, physical appearance is great factor. We always look at the physical appearance of a person before we get attracted to a person ,right? It's the law of life. But once you have been bonded by what you call love, the physical appearance becomes secondary. It is the bond of love and friendship that married couples have shared through the years that will make their relationship unbreakable that even old age, hair loss, bad breath or a debilitating disease would make the two of them inseparable.
2007-09-21 03:51:27 · answer #4 · answered by Reycen 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If a persons physical appearance is not up to what it should be due to illness then this is not their fault. But for a person just to let themselves go, gain a lot of weight, have poor oral or body hygiene, then that is just being neglectful and feeling too comfortable with taking the love their spouse has for them for granted.
2007-09-21 03:44:07 · answer #5 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To a point, yes. Taking pride enough in yourself to look as good as possible (watching the weight, etc) should be a priority no matter what the maritial status is. and Most definitely, keeping clean and well groomed.
But beauty should be in the eyes of the beholder and if you truly love someone their physical appearance should not be a factor.
2007-09-21 03:45:24 · answer #6 · answered by wild_orchid_tx36 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not with a spouse, no. When you got married it was supposedly for better or worse, etc. A change in physical appearance is gonna happen as people age, there's nothing you can do about it. In addition to the looks, you married the person and that's the part that will last. =)
2007-09-21 03:43:15 · answer #7 · answered by Vbonics 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think true love trascends the physical aspect of a relationship; but it would be naive to say that looks don't matter. I believe that we should try to take care of ourselves in all aspects, and this includes our physique and our health.
We are human, imperfect and visual. We live in a world where beauty and youth are considered assets, and many people are brought up to believe it's OK to be shallow.
( Don't get me wrong...Beautiful people are eye candy; but I think you can find greater beauty in people who have good feelings and a healthy self-esteem. For example, actress Audrey Hepburn...She was beautiful and successful; and when she was older she did volunteer work for the UN. I think people like her are beautiful both inside and out.)
Age and illness will catch up, eventually..and we will all lose our looks. And people who base their relationships or marriage exclusively on their partner's good looks, will be very disappointed when nature and time take their toll.
2007-09-21 06:41:39 · answer #8 · answered by Nena S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It shouldn't, but I"m sure there are people in the world that let it. You should love your spouse no matter what they look like. If my husband was in a terrible accident and was disfigured or lost a limb, I would love him, and help him cope. Or if he lost all of his hair tomorrow, or whatever happened, I would love him. Looks may be what initially attracted you to your partner, but your love should grow to the point that goes way beyond looks. If looks affect your love for them, then you didn't love them to begin with.
If you found out today that your spouse had cancer, or some other potentially fatal disease, would it affect how you feel for them?
2007-09-21 03:45:14 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some things are unaviodable.
I mean, no one gets out of menopause, man. It's inevitable.
There are probably certain parameters most people would set limits on - if they weigh 2,000 pounds it's a problem for perhaps physical attraction, for example.
But do you still love that person? Of course you do. Otherwise you are fairly superficial, yes?
2007-09-21 03:43:19 · answer #10 · answered by filthy_crumb 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋